Does this sound silly to you?
Discussion
I was at the bar in a pub waiting for my turn when the chap in front of me, who had bought a pint and a short, opened his wallet, took out a £50 note and gave it to the barman. “You got to be joking.” he said. “I aint got change for that.” After checking through all his other pockets he turned to me and said. “If you pay for my drinks, I’ll give you a machine that’ll change your life.”
I asked to see it and he took me over to where a nice looking bit of stuff was sitting at a table, on which there was this box. “That’s it.” he said. My doubt must have been obvious ‘cause he said, “I’ll show you what it does.”
He took a piece of paper, pushed it into a slot and turned a small key on the top. After a few seconds a piece of paper came out the other end. He picked it up and gave it to me, saying “It’s a bit damp so don’t run you fingers over the ink.”
It was a £50 note. Apart from the ink glistening a bit it looked indistinguishable from the real thing. I’m not stupid, so I said, “I’m not stupid, that was in there already.”
He gave me another piece of paper, told me to initial it in the corners and then pushed it in the machine. He went through the same rigmarole he did before and out came a £50 note. When he gave it to me I could see the marks I made in the corners.
I said, “Thanks very much, but you pay for your own beer.”
He said, “But don’t you want this machine?”
I said, “What for? I’m a plumber.”
I asked to see it and he took me over to where a nice looking bit of stuff was sitting at a table, on which there was this box. “That’s it.” he said. My doubt must have been obvious ‘cause he said, “I’ll show you what it does.”
He took a piece of paper, pushed it into a slot and turned a small key on the top. After a few seconds a piece of paper came out the other end. He picked it up and gave it to me, saying “It’s a bit damp so don’t run you fingers over the ink.”
It was a £50 note. Apart from the ink glistening a bit it looked indistinguishable from the real thing. I’m not stupid, so I said, “I’m not stupid, that was in there already.”
He gave me another piece of paper, told me to initial it in the corners and then pushed it in the machine. He went through the same rigmarole he did before and out came a £50 note. When he gave it to me I could see the marks I made in the corners.
I said, “Thanks very much, but you pay for your own beer.”
He said, “But don’t you want this machine?”
I said, “What for? I’m a plumber.”
Having just had to pay a small fortune for a minor bit of plumbing I might well sort through all the mags as they are posted just to delay those destined for Mid Essex. This would make me feel better but, unfortunately, no richer.
Sprint's been printed and is with the despatchers. However there might be a slight delay as there is a little something extra in this month's Sprint.
Hope you like it.
Sprint's been printed and is with the despatchers. However there might be a slight delay as there is a little something extra in this month's Sprint.
Hope you like it.
Derek Smith said:
Having just had to pay a small fortune for a minor bit of plumbing I might well sort through all the mags as they are posted just to delay those destined for Mid Essex. This would make me feel better but, unfortunately, no richer.
You lil ol spoilsport.......
It's just that Ray has his Evo......I need my Sprint!!
And anyway.....there was no 'where's my Sprint' thread
someone had to do it....
For goodness sake don't tell Podie of your minor bit of plumbing.....if he gets wind of it...you're stuffed
Seriously though....hope you're okay.
...//P//
Oi! Derek! No! You did that last month 
.
Yesterday was a bad day for me as my lad went down with what we think is mumps. I caught it for a second time when I was 35 and it was extremely uncomfortable so I'm a bit nervous at the moment. I suggest you read my articles with care as they might be infectious. Men my age are safe enough as we read at arms length in any case. For me it was a case of wearing glasses or getting longer arms.
Mind you, my mother always told me to leave my articles alone.
I was 'lucky' according to the doctor as my dose of mumps only affected the glands round my neck. One night I woke up after a muscle went over the swollen gland and got stuck! I could only just breathe. If that was lucky . . . They injected the muscle to relax it and my head all but fell off. They all thought that was funny. The medical profession are a wierd lot.
I do, of course, hope that none of those who have contributed to this topic catch anything.
Mind you, my mother always told me to leave my articles alone.
I was 'lucky' according to the doctor as my dose of mumps only affected the glands round my neck. One night I woke up after a muscle went over the swollen gland and got stuck! I could only just breathe. If that was lucky . . . They injected the muscle to relax it and my head all but fell off. They all thought that was funny. The medical profession are a wierd lot.
I do, of course, hope that none of those who have contributed to this topic catch anything.
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