Change of Career

[rich1231]

Looking for advice on a change of Career.


I want to become an Arms Dealer/Broker.

Some background first..

I have no qualms about selling weapoms of any sort to Despotic regimes. In fact kids carrying guns is quite cool.

I like the idea of being wined and dined by the most dangerous people in the world.

I enjoy the idea of having the tale of my life being made into film in a few years time.

I like seeing things blow up.

So apart from politics, what career could could be better for the morally bankrupt. Any of you in the industry already, please email me so I can arrange to bump you off and replace you. ta

[Swillsy]

Who just watched lord of war:P

[rich1231]

Swillsy said:

Who just watched lord of war:P

Watched it a few years ago.. not the instigator of this process.


Joking aside...

I'd want to do it in a more legit fashion..

[mark69sheer]

Not a career for the naive I wouldn't have thought.

[chris_w666]

I think its like dealing drugs, you start small selling starting pistols and replicas to council estate pikeys from the back of an old range rover.

[sadoksevoli]

rich1231 said:

Looking for advice on a change of Career.


I want to become an Arms Dealer/Broker.

Some background first..

I have no qualms about selling weapoms of any sort to Despotic regimes. In fact kids carrying guns is quite cool.

I like the idea of being wined and dined by the most dangerous people in the world.

I enjoy the idea of having the tale of my life being made into film in a few years time.

I like seeing things blow up.

So apart from politics, what career could could be better for the morally bankrupt. Any of you in the industry already, please email me so I can arrange to bump you off and replace you. ta

Best way is start small-time, selling stanley knives and screwdrivers to children under 10, then learn how to rig deactivated firearms to function how they were originally designed to and sell these to teenage gang-members. Eventually you'll have enough money and connections to buy yourself a proper "piece" and sell it on for a small profit. Then wehn oyu ahve saved up for the airfare (and if unlucky doen a 5-10 stretch in a UK jail) go to Russia, walk into any dodgy looking bar and starting asking around for anyone who wants to do "deals", if you don't end up with your throat slit then you may get offered a few T-72s with a couple of hundred AK47s - find a ship, pay off the somali pirates, send ship to Africa, and find someone who is prepared to pay money for the dodgy diamonds that go for currency in most war-torn parts of Africa. Oh and be prepared to have your shirt-lifted by Mandelson in return for official British accreditation as a bona fide arms dealer - if he really likes you he might even introduce to a few of his Russian "friends".

Simple.

I'm bored too.

[Mr POD]

BAe Systems is one legitimate way of selling death/defence/weapons* They are recruiting at the moment.

• Delete, depending on how you view the 'Attack' Industry.

[roboxm3]

I know of a little boat with a few weapons on board...if you facy a challenge ;o) ;o)

[scotal]

Have you consideered your target market Dickie? There will be a fair number of militant Islamic Militias in there (I'm thinking across the rougher parts of the middles east, large bits of africa, the rump of the ex USSR, some bits of the far east.) I'm not sure they are going to take a natural shine to you.
I also think the boys and girls at Mossad are going to want a quiet chat about your new activites.

[sadoksevoli]

roboxm3 said:

I know of a little boat with a few weapons on board...if you facy a challenge ;o) ;o)

I think they're waiting for one of the little feckers to start playing with the tanks, blow a hole in the side of the boat and sink it.

[Timmy35]

Rich you'd be wasted in the arms trade.....come and set up a brothel on the beach in Vietnam instead. Far more fun all round.

[gti-ted]

Chap who lives directly opposite actualy sells weapons for a living. You would not believe some of the stuff that the army has at it's disposal

[rich1231]

Timmy35 said:

Rich you'd be wasted in the arms trade.....come and set up a brothel on the beach in Vietnam instead. Far more fun all round.

I have diversified business entities... arms is the next on the list


Rich1231's Tanks and shooters.
Coup funding and arming a speciiality.

[Fidgits]

seriously, like any change in career, id reccomend working for a large company (H&K springs to mind) to build up contacts and experience in the market before setting out on your own..

[speedy_thrills]

Easier to produce your own? Made in seperate parts by different companies using children in China, sell the parts in lots of 1000. Don't sell them anything too good or they'll kill each other before you get to take all their money/assets/women/camels.

[Timmy35]

In a few years time I'm going to setup a people smuggling operation, I'll specialise in illegal emigration, after Labour have bolted the exit doors in the name of national security.

[Kuroblack350]

Mr POD said:

BAe Systems is one legitimate way of selling death/defence/weapons* They are recruiting at the moment.

• Delete, depending on how you view the 'Attack' Industry.

Oi, cheeky fecker

... and it's BAE Systems, not BAe

I suspect the pay/perks aren't quite in line with what the OP is looking for though

[cornishgirl]

You are trolling for MI5 to see who responds AICMFP.

[rhinochopig]

There is a big market for "Dirty Bombs" Make your own and then sell them on to certain terrorist groups. All you need is a lead lined suitcase with a LED count-down timer on the outside and filled with something heavy. The buyer would not be able to open it to check what was in it.

This may upset a few people, but you'd be helping to defend the realm by reducing the amount of money the terrorists have to spend on arms. Everyone's a winner.

[Timmy35]

rhinochopig said:

There is a big market for "Dirty Bombs" Make your own and then sell them on to certain terrorist groups. All you need is a lead lined suitcase with a LED count-down timer on the outside and filled with something heavy. The buyer would not be able to open it to check what was in it.

For a more budget option try a bag of dogst and a banger ( one of the good ones you can buy in French hypermarkets )