Bionic man
Author
Discussion

Jetl3on

Original Poster:

1,409 posts

226 months

Monday 6th October 2008
quotequote all
Helping my nephew with some ideas for a project after reading about the dog which had a bionic leg fused with his nervous system (and keeping it clean), if you could have one part of your anatomy replaced with bionics what would it be and why?

Schmeeky

4,301 posts

247 months

Monday 6th October 2008
quotequote all
This is going to go downhill fast....

hehe

Jetl3on

Original Poster:

1,409 posts

226 months

Monday 6th October 2008
quotequote all
Schmeeky said:
This is going to go downhill fast....

hehe
Oh dear frown I shouldnt bother ask to keep it clean as there is no chance of that.

V8mate

45,899 posts

219 months

Monday 6th October 2008
quotequote all
I've written and deleted several ideas. Decided to stay schtum now.

smile

ofcorsa

3,546 posts

273 months

Monday 6th October 2008
quotequote all
my skin

Mars

10,144 posts

244 months

Monday 6th October 2008
quotequote all
Skeleton

Pigeon

18,535 posts

276 months

Monday 6th October 2008
quotequote all
My entire digestive/nutritional/excretory system.

Especially right now, it is currently pissing me off by trying to make me eat something, and I'm not ready to eat something until I'm about to go to bed, so that I can take advantage of the saltiness of the food to stop me needing a piss every five minutes while I'm trying to get to sleep. I eat a sufficient quantity of food that I maintain a constant weight and I can fking do without this constant grief from my digestive system trying to make me eat it at inconvenient times. Listen you stupid bloody piece of biology, you get fed once a day, and once a day is all it's going to bloody be, sodding well get used to it.

I would replace the intake side of things with something that can assimilate straightforward, cheap materials that don't require any messing about. Half a pint of diesel per day is enough to satisfy the energy requirements, it's much quicker to drink half a pint of liquid than it is to eat something and diesel is a fk of a lot cheaper than food. Another possible alternative would be a power cord that I could plug into the mains and recharge myself while I'm asleep.

I'd replace the internal processing bit with something that is capable of recycling and reforming the necessary chemicals, instead of pissing them out or burning them and then demanding that I eat new ones.

Having done that I would no longer need an ahole so that's another problem sorted. What is it with this business of having to spend 10 minutes trying to have a st when every other bloody species on the planet takes 10 seconds and doesn't have to wipe its arse?

And while we're at it I'd replace the brain with something where I could bloody well edit the software and the data like I can on a proper computer. I'd be able to change it so I didn't spend the whole time getting pissed off with every bloody thing in the world bar one, and I'd be able to get rid of the memories that I don't want instead of having them keep popping up at the least desirable moment.

In fact, sod it, just make me into a Cyberman, where do I sign up?

Jetl3on

Original Poster:

1,409 posts

226 months

Tuesday 7th October 2008
quotequote all
Pigeon said:
My entire digestive/nutritional/excretory system.

Especially right now, it is currently pissing me off by trying to make me eat something, and I'm not ready to eat something until I'm about to go to bed, so that I can take advantage of the saltiness of the food to stop me needing a piss every five minutes while I'm trying to get to sleep. I eat a sufficient quantity of food that I maintain a constant weight and I can fking do without this constant grief from my digestive system trying to make me eat it at inconvenient times. Listen you stupid bloody piece of biology, you get fed once a day, and once a day is all it's going to bloody be, sodding well get used to it.

I would replace the intake side of things with something that can assimilate straightforward, cheap materials that don't require any messing about. Half a pint of diesel per day is enough to satisfy the energy requirements, it's much quicker to drink half a pint of liquid than it is to eat something and diesel is a fk of a lot cheaper than food. Another possible alternative would be a power cord that I could plug into the mains and recharge myself while I'm asleep.

I'd replace the internal processing bit with something that is capable of recycling and reforming the necessary chemicals, instead of pissing them out or burning them and then demanding that I eat new ones.

Having done that I would no longer need an ahole so that's another problem sorted. What is it with this business of having to spend 10 minutes trying to have a st when every other bloody species on the planet takes 10 seconds and doesn't have to wipe its arse?

And while we're at it I'd replace the brain with something where I could bloody well edit the software and the data like I can on a proper computer. I'd be able to change it so I didn't spend the whole time getting pissed off with every bloody thing in the world bar one, and I'd be able to get rid of the memories that I don't want instead of having them keep popping up at the least desirable moment.

In fact, sod it, just make me into a Cyberman, where do I sign up?
Interesting as your digestive system is, not quite the material we were aiming at for school yikes

But thank you mad

Einion Yrth

19,575 posts

274 months

Tuesday 7th October 2008
quotequote all
Eyes. Presbyopia is a pain.

thebluebus

3,558 posts

247 months

Tuesday 7th October 2008
quotequote all
Einion Yrth said:
Eyes. Presbyopia is a pain.
Is that when everybody looks like "The King"?

Ledaig

1,808 posts

292 months

Tuesday 7th October 2008
quotequote all
Jetl3on said:
Pigeon said:
My entire digestive/nutritional/excretory system.
Interesting as your digestive system is, not quite the material we were aiming at for school yikes

But thank you mad
All joking apart, every body will have the usual eyes legs arms etc, but the digestive system could be quite unique.

Think of the advantages which could be considered -

Make it a cheap system, it doesn't need to think or feel, just process.
It could run off virtually any available source of raw material which could be processed.
Food poisoning would be a think of the past.
People could be 'modified' at birth. A little further development could see a system which could grow with the human body.
Third world hunger could be more easily controlled (they may still need food, but it could now be in any form).
Global energy costs could be reduced (why bother heating/cooking anything)
Food wastage would be reduced/eliminated as items need no longer have a shelf life.
Given that you can control what is going in you can control the end waste product and its usability.
Etc.....

smile

Jetl3on

Original Poster:

1,409 posts

226 months

Tuesday 7th October 2008
quotequote all
Ledaig said:
Jetl3on said:
Pigeon said:
My entire digestive/nutritional/excretory system.
Interesting as your digestive system is, not quite the material we were aiming at for school yikes

But thank you mad
All joking apart, every body will have the usual eyes legs arms etc, but the digestive system could be quite unique.

Think of the advantages which could be considered -

Make it a cheap system, it doesn't need to think or feel, just process.
It could run off virtually any available source of raw material which could be processed.
Food poisoning would be a think of the past.
People could be 'modified' at birth. A little further development could see a system which could grow with the human body.
Third world hunger could be more easily controlled (they may still need food, but it could now be in any form).
Global energy costs could be reduced (why bother heating/cooking anything)
Food wastage would be reduced/eliminated as items need no longer have a shelf life.
Given that you can control what is going in you can control the end waste product and its usability.
Etc.....

smile
Printed and checking its applicability as we speak.

Thanks

Adam_W

1,098 posts

230 months

Tuesday 7th October 2008
quotequote all
For me it'd be eyes, to see like a hawk/falcon would be awesome!

Edited by Adam_W on Tuesday 7th October 15:39

Marf

22,907 posts

271 months

Tuesday 7th October 2008
quotequote all
Have to agree with Pigeon, my digestive system. Nearly a solid month of acid reflux is not fun redface