Where's Basil Fawlty?
Discussion
Tonight I'm staying at the worst hotel in Britain, I think! I won't be specific, other than to say I'm near Darlington. Allow me to explain:
1) On arrival they're not expecting me - I have an email and ref no. The receptionist is irritated by my presence!
2) The key doesn't work.
3) All the wall paper is falling off the wall.
4) The TV doesn't work.
5) The phone doesn't work.
6) There's no hot water.
7) They won't serve me food at 9:15, despite last orders supposed to be at 9:30 (chef's got a problem?)
8) The red wine tastes like malt vinegar.
9) The alarm clock stopped at 12:00.
10) The room's like a sauna and the radiator can't be switched. Can't open the window because of the noise outside.
I don't think I'll be rushing back - and I think I might have a quiet word with the manager in the morning!
1) On arrival they're not expecting me - I have an email and ref no. The receptionist is irritated by my presence!
2) The key doesn't work.
3) All the wall paper is falling off the wall.
4) The TV doesn't work.
5) The phone doesn't work.
6) There's no hot water.
7) They won't serve me food at 9:15, despite last orders supposed to be at 9:30 (chef's got a problem?)
8) The red wine tastes like malt vinegar.
9) The alarm clock stopped at 12:00.
10) The room's like a sauna and the radiator can't be switched. Can't open the window because of the noise outside.
I don't think I'll be rushing back - and I think I might have a quiet word with the manager in the morning!
srebbe64 said:
I've got an "Xda lls palm top" thingie. Great piece of kit, actually!
srebbe64 said:Still, at least you got a bed and an "Xda lls palm top" thingie.
On arrival they're not expecting me - I have an email and ref no. The receptionist is irritated by my presence!
srebbe64 said:Still, at least you managed to get to your bed and play with your "Xda lls palm top" thingie.
The key doesn't work.
srebbe64 said:You could always just play with your "Xda lls palm top" thingie.
All the wall paper is falling off the wall.
srebbe64 said:Can't you look at porn on your "Xda lls palm top" thingie?
The TV doesn't work.
srebbe64 said:but you've got an "Xda lls palm top" thingie?
The phone doesn't work.
srebbe64 said:Hot water is for puffs that don't have an "Xda lls palm top" thingie
There's no hot water.
srebbe64 said:Can't you phone out for a take away or pizza with your "Xda lls palm top" thingie
They won't serve me food at 9:15, despite last orders supposed to be at 9:30 (chef's got a problem?)
srebbe64 said:Check out some late night establishments on your "Xda lls palm top" thingie
The red wine tastes like malt vinegar.
srebbe64 said:Doesn't an "Xda lls palm top" thingie have an alarm clock?
The alarm clock stopped at 12:00.
srebbe64 said:Take a cold bath/shower?
The room's like a sauna and the radiator can't be switched. Can't open the window because of the noise outside.
srebbe64 said:
alfaman said:
didn't see Basil though , but Marion the receptionist is MUCH more attractive than Cybil![]()
I think I can safely say that is definitely NOT the case at this particular facility!
Have you considered using Premier Travel-Inns (or similar )when / where you are unsure of the local hotel ? - I have always found them to be a decent standard and consistent .
TheExcession said:
srebbe64 said:
I've got an "Xda lls palm top" thingie. Great piece of kit, actually! srebbe64 said:Still, at least you got a bed and an "Xda lls palm top" thingie.
On arrival they're not expecting me - I have an email and ref no. The receptionist is irritated by my presence! srebbe64 said:Still, at least you managed to get to your bed and play with your "Xda lls palm top" thingie.
The key doesn't work. srebbe64 said:You could always just play with your "Xda lls palm top" thingie.
All the wall paper is falling off the wall. srebbe64 said:Can't you look at porn on your "Xda lls palm top" thingie?
The TV doesn't work. srebbe64 said:but you've got an "Xda lls palm top" thingie?
The phone doesn't work. srebbe64 said:Hot water is for puffs that don't have an "Xda lls palm top" thingie
There's no hot water. srebbe64 said:Can't you phone out for a take away or pizza with your "Xda lls palm top" thingie
They won't serve me food at 9:15, despite last orders supposed to be at 9:30 (chef's got a problem?) srebbe64 said:Check out some late night establishments on your "Xda lls palm top" thingie
The red wine tastes like malt vinegar. srebbe64 said:Doesn't an "Xda lls palm top" thingie have an alarm clock?
The alarm clock stopped at 12:00. srebbe64 said:Take a cold bath/shower?
The room's like a sauna and the radiator can't be switched. Can't open the window because of the noise outside. ![]()
Post of the month so far for me Ex 
Having given the matter even more thought.....
Can you get a software developers kit for an "Xda lls palm top" thingie?
Can you see where I'm going here? All those lonely nights away in hotels, what great opportunity to develop the next Killer Application.
I'm thinking something coupled with GPS and a list of all the known garages in the world... Then when you get out of the car at a filling station and approach a pump it rings a little reminder bell, up pops a picture of each of your cars with a little picture of a particularly relevent pump handle next to it...
This Application could save people a small fortune in costly fueling mistakes....

Can you get a software developers kit for an "Xda lls palm top" thingie?
Can you see where I'm going here? All those lonely nights away in hotels, what great opportunity to develop the next Killer Application.
I'm thinking something coupled with GPS and a list of all the known garages in the world... Then when you get out of the car at a filling station and approach a pump it rings a little reminder bell, up pops a picture of each of your cars with a little picture of a particularly relevent pump handle next to it...
This Application could save people a small fortune in costly fueling mistakes....

Staying in a 'Scandic' hotel (part of Hilton) in Uppsala, Sweden last night.
Great hotel! About £100 for the night, including free (yes FREE) wireless internet access. Everything's wooden, everyone speaks fluent English and breakfast, part of the cost, was incredible. No bath though, just a wet room with shower...

Great hotel! About £100 for the night, including free (yes FREE) wireless internet access. Everything's wooden, everyone speaks fluent English and breakfast, part of the cost, was incredible. No bath though, just a wet room with shower...
TheExcession said:
BliarOut said:
Post of the month so far for me Ex
cheers mate... how are the guts holding out?
Maybe shrubbery44 could look up some cures for you on his old "Xda lls palm top" thingie
They're fine now thanks... Even eating chicken again
Any excuse to bump this for anyone that's missed it!
Well I've since left the said hotel and have since had a meeting with a client (oh how we laughed!)
This morning I went down for breakfast, and ordered a 'full English breakfast + toast. Anyway, breakfast arrived with no eggs - because they've run out!
Finally, I complained to the duty manager who suggested I write a letter to the main man. I asked for his/her name and she said she can't tell me because of the "data protection act" - at which I replied "what a load of cobblers!"
I will, however, be dropping a letter to the hotel. And, more to the point, I'll get my PA to report my experience to the particular agency she used.
This morning I went down for breakfast, and ordered a 'full English breakfast + toast. Anyway, breakfast arrived with no eggs - because they've run out!
Finally, I complained to the duty manager who suggested I write a letter to the main man. I asked for his/her name and she said she can't tell me because of the "data protection act" - at which I replied "what a load of cobblers!"
I will, however, be dropping a letter to the hotel. And, more to the point, I'll get my PA to report my experience to the particular agency she used.
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