Kids, you're so busted.
Discussion
Kids eh, a few years ago, when mine were about three and four they were bickering as usual at bedtime. Then suddenly there was a bit of extra commotion above the general hubub. Daughter A now claims daughter B has just bitten her, but daughter B's protestations of innocence seemed very genuine.
I had a look at the bitemark and it didn't look right
Right thinks I, time for this.
Daughter A looks at me blankly.
Daughter A still looks at me blankly, but with a hint of defiance thrown in for good measure.
So I lift her arm to her mouth, and sure enough, the match is good enough for a conviction.
She was well and truly busted at that point. These women can be evil things
So who's got any good tales of their kids getting well and truly owned?
I had a look at the bitemark and it didn't look right
Right thinks I, time for this.
I said:
Daughter A, did you know everyone has different teeth?
Daughter A looks at me blankly.
I said:
And if I line that mark up it will either match your teeth or daughter B's
Daughter A still looks at me blankly, but with a hint of defiance thrown in for good measure.
I said:
Did daughter B really bite you?
Daughter A said:
So I lift her arm to her mouth, and sure enough, the match is good enough for a conviction.
I said:
Look, those teeth marks exactly match your teeth.
Daughter A said:
The Spanish inquisition said:
So, did daughter B really bite you?
Daughter A said:
She was well and truly busted at that point. These women can be evil things
So who's got any good tales of their kids getting well and truly owned?
anonymous said:
[redacted]
You don't know kids very well do you. I used to steal chocolates from the cupboard and hid the wrappers in a crack in a wall in the bathroom so the evidence couldn't be found somewhere obvious like the bin (first place they'd look). Parents never could figure out who was taking them, until they renovated the bathroom and I was done
. Learned my lesson and never got caught again Never under estimate a child
BG junior is very reluctant to eat his cereals in the morning. This morning he very cunningly left the weetabix box opened and on the kitchen worktop, put an empty bowl in the sink and then put some milk in the water along with crumbs from the box. All to make it look like he had had some breakfast. Going to all that trouble he may just as well have had some real breakfast.
Balmoral Green said:
BG junior is very reluctant to eat his cereals in the morning. This morning he very cunningly left the weetabix box opened and on the kitchen worktop, put an empty bowl in the sink and then put some milk in the water along with crumbs from the box. All to make it look like he had had some breakfast. Going to all that trouble he may just as well have had some real breakfast.
I used to do that as well!!
Ali_Kat said:
BG junior is very reluctant to eat his cereals in the morning. This morning he very cunningly left the weetabix box opened and on the kitchen worktop, put an empty bowl in the sink and then put some milk in the water along with crumbs from the box. All to make it look like he had had some breakfast. Going to all that trouble he may just as well have had some real breakfast.
I used to do that as well!!
Yup - I did that a few times when we only had "healthy" cereals in the house.
Friend of mine has the child from hell living next door. At the age of 4 she was caught putting gravel in his disc brakes, killing goldfish etc. Now (11) she just bursts into his house, throws things about and steals money. Last week she fired a toy BB gun at his coffee-maker and smashed the glass jug. He's too nice to do much about it - I fitted a new lock on his front door but he still lets her in. 
>> Edited by simpo two on Wednesday 21st December 10:23
>> Edited by simpo two on Wednesday 21st December 10:23
I used to avoid eating vegetables by simply hiding them in the pocket of my schol blazer that always hung conveniently adjacent to the table in my parents' breakfast room.
Then I'd dispose of the evidence in a hedge on my way to school.
Eventually I outgrew the blazer but it still hung there, so I switched to stashing the veggies and moving them later when parents were out/ plumped in front of telly etc.
One day I forgot to shift the evidence and a few days later my blazer had mould growing all over it...
Took some explaining, I can tell you
Then I'd dispose of the evidence in a hedge on my way to school.
Eventually I outgrew the blazer but it still hung there, so I switched to stashing the veggies and moving them later when parents were out/ plumped in front of telly etc.
One day I forgot to shift the evidence and a few days later my blazer had mould growing all over it...
Took some explaining, I can tell you
I was in a lengthy war of attrition against my parents and the dentist over wearing braces on my teeth. I used to take the foully uncomfortable things out the minute I was out of sight, and several of them got "accidentally" broken. After a couple of years of pointless torture, I won. Relief...
Pigeon said:
I was in a lengthy war of attrition against my parents and the dentist over wearing braces on my teeth. I used to take the foully uncomfortable things out the minute I was out of sight, and several of them got "accidentally" broken. After a couple of years of pointless torture, I won. Relief...
...said Pigeon:
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