Blonde moments
Discussion
Two of my friends at uni are somewhat "blonde", changing a light bulb presents a challenge!
I was round there the other night, went to use the bathroom sink and found it blocked and full of water.
Apparently, one of them was burning a bloody huge candle and either some of it spilt or she just decided to get rid of the wax, by pouring it down the sink...
I was round there the other night, went to use the bathroom sink and found it blocked and full of water.
Apparently, one of them was burning a bloody huge candle and either some of it spilt or she just decided to get rid of the wax, by pouring it down the sink...
Another genuine blonde moment involving a candle as reported to me by my wife who worked in the customer service dept of a certain moose-loving furniture chain:
Customer (blonde of course) demands a refund for a candle she bought.
Wife: What's the reason for the return?
Customer: The candle melted.
Wife: Do you know why it melted?
Customer: Because I lit it.
Wife: <pause> What did you expect it to do?
Customer: I didn't expect it to melt the way it did.
I'm still trying to persuade my wife to write a book on her experiences with the utterly insane customers she's had to deal with - this, along with the hormonal 4'10" tall woman who kidnapped not one but TWO 6'+ tall delivery drivers and the woman who, on asking what colour a white wardrobe was, got abusive and threatened to sue when she recieved the reply "err, white..." are just a few of many...
>> Edited by branflakes on Thursday 15th December 11:55
Customer (blonde of course) demands a refund for a candle she bought.
Wife: What's the reason for the return?
Customer: The candle melted.
Wife: Do you know why it melted?
Customer: Because I lit it.
Wife: <pause> What did you expect it to do?
Customer: I didn't expect it to melt the way it did.
I'm still trying to persuade my wife to write a book on her experiences with the utterly insane customers she's had to deal with - this, along with the hormonal 4'10" tall woman who kidnapped not one but TWO 6'+ tall delivery drivers and the woman who, on asking what colour a white wardrobe was, got abusive and threatened to sue when she recieved the reply "err, white..." are just a few of many...
>> Edited by branflakes on Thursday 15th December 11:55
I did a similar thing. Had been on a date, got her upstairs, lit a candle on a bookshelf, started my highly erotic pre-mating dance, then she mentioned something about a burning smell. I replied with a "Well you're not the first woman to say that my dear" sort of line, looked round and noticed the shelf above had caught fire.
Try as I might to get back into the Stringfellow Zone, I found myself giggling every couple of minutes
Try as I might to get back into the Stringfellow Zone, I found myself giggling every couple of minutes

Went camping with some mates once... we were all sat round in the tent ("We could all be sat round...") with illumination provided by eight candles in a metal pie dish, all flickering merrily away.
After a while the heat melted the candles, so what we then had was a metal pie dish full of molten wax with eight wicks sticking out of it, all still flickering merrily away as if they were still part of complete candles.
But the heat continued to build up, until it got to the point where the dish of molten wax was hot enough to generate a combustible concentration of vapour by evaporation direct from the surface without the help of the wicks. All of a sudden we had a huge great flame as if the dish was full of petrol. It's remarkable how quick you can get stuff out of a tent when you really need to, and we managed to limit the damage to the door flaps, which had massive holes in.
After a while the heat melted the candles, so what we then had was a metal pie dish full of molten wax with eight wicks sticking out of it, all still flickering merrily away as if they were still part of complete candles.
But the heat continued to build up, until it got to the point where the dish of molten wax was hot enough to generate a combustible concentration of vapour by evaporation direct from the surface without the help of the wicks. All of a sudden we had a huge great flame as if the dish was full of petrol. It's remarkable how quick you can get stuff out of a tent when you really need to, and we managed to limit the damage to the door flaps, which had massive holes in.
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good i have a day job!