neighbour/wall
Discussion
have a boundary wall between my back garden and my neighbour's front garden/driveway/garage (they have no windows windows overlooking the wall).
the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbours today, they were very unhappy, tears (not used on purpose, not obvious, I just noticed them), threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbours today, they were very unhappy, tears (not used on purpose, not obvious, I just noticed them), threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
Edited by PlywoodPascal on Monday 3rd March 08:10
PlywoodPascal said:
have a boundary wall between my back garden and my neighbour's front garden/driveway/garage (they have no windows windows overlooking the wall).
the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbour today, they were very unhappy, tears, threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
There are some odd people about, some just don’t like change whether it actually impacts them or not. I doubt you can work out a strategy until you know exactly what they object to. Did they actually give you any reasons?the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbour today, they were very unhappy, tears, threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
PlywoodPascal said:
have a boundary wall between my back garden and my neighbour's front garden/driveway/garage (they have no windows windows overlooking the wall).
the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbour today, they were very unhappy, tears, threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
Although you have the right to increase the height and you might it feel it gives you more privacy, it will also reduce light to both properties. Why not simply fix a trellis on the existing wall. Gives privacy and helps prevent your garden looking like the inside of a prison yard.the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbour today, they were very unhappy, tears, threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
JQ said:
There are some odd people about, some just don’t like change whether it actually impacts them or not. I doubt you can work out a strategy until you know exactly what they object to. Did they actually give you any reasons?
no, no reason(s) given. they are asking to see planning permission/building whatever, of course this is not needed.they (probably reasonably) object to quite short notice I have given them, but at the same time, I have been trying to speak face-to-face since I knew it was happening. I did not want to do it by text or whatever because I recognised it could be delicate.
I have called off the planned work (I will pay the builder for the lost day, in fact), to be able to speak again with neighbours again before, if we can agree, resuming.
Bobtherallyfan said:
Although you have the right to increase the height and you might it feel it gives you more privacy, it will also reduce light to both properties. Why not simply fix a trellis on the existing wall. Gives privacy and helps prevent your garden looking like the inside of a prison yard.
the garden is walled all the way around, in nice old stone and brick. A bit of trellis on top looks (IMO) naff. the wall is on the north side of the garden, and against a side of their house with no windows in, so (I thought, perhaps neighbours feel differently) lost light would not really seem a problem, the additional height blocking light as it would only from a wall of the house.
joshcowin said:
Just get on and build it, ensure you are withing your rights and that planning/approval isn't needed.
You will never please them, they sound unreasonable.
Yep. If you cave into this episode of waterworks simply because they don't like it they will start to mistake your kindness for weakness. I can't imagine with such an old style wall that you are just going to adding height with concrete blocks so the fact they threw a tantrum without articulating what the issue is just tells me they are just being difficult.You will never please them, they sound unreasonable.
It does rather depend on how you value the relationship with your neighbour. You have the right to do what you want and they just have to lump it, on the other hand it depends if you think it will irreparably damage the relationship and whether that matters or not to you.
Personally if they express rational, calm reservations then I’m much more open to consider their opinion than if they exhibit histrionics and threats.
However, adding more courses to an old wall will never blend in well - it will always look like what it is. Have you considered a foliage based screen?
Personally if they express rational, calm reservations then I’m much more open to consider their opinion than if they exhibit histrionics and threats.
However, adding more courses to an old wall will never blend in well - it will always look like what it is. Have you considered a foliage based screen?
PlywoodPascal said:
have a boundary wall between my back garden and my neighbour's front garden/driveway/garage (they have no windows windows overlooking the wall).
the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbour today, they were very unhappy, tears, threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
Sounds like this may be subject to the Party Wall Act, mind how you go!the wall is on my land, and has been with my house since it was built, 100+ years before the neighbour.
the wall is about 5ft tall.
I have/had plans to build it up to the allowable 200cm tall. because it is currently quite low, our garden does not feel very secluded.
I mentioned it to neighbour today, they were very unhappy, tears, threats, etc.
they object to the idea of it, and want to know why we want to build it higher.
of course, we have the right to do it, but it may unwise to do so given their strong feelings.
talking to them again tomorrow.
any suggestions for how to handle this?
What's it made of? Matching old stone or brick and mortar may be difficult and a bad job will stand out like a boil in the middle of your forehead. That said tears over 18" of wall seems a little over the top, unless next door's garden is a postage stamp and the extra shade will affect a favourite lounging spot. Perhaps mock it up with some sticks and string to show what it will look like?
hidetheelephants said:
What's it made of? Matching old stone or brick and mortar may be difficult and a bad job will stand out like a boil in the middle of your forehead. That said tears over 18" of wall seems a little over the top, unless next door's garden is a postage stamp and the extra shade will affect a favourite lounging spot. Perhaps mock it up with some sticks and string to show what it will look like?
It will never match - you and a PhilboSE are correct. This wall is old imperial brick up to about 3ft, and then there are about 6 courses of modern brick on top of that (done abut 30 years ago), which obviously don’t match. Thats why I’m relaxed about building it up further, the walls are already a mismatch, in a way I like how you can see the visible stages of their evolution elsewhere we have 6ft brick walls, 9ft stone ones, and even some 6ft stone ones with couple of feet of imperial brick on top.
I am not aware that the area adjacent to this wall is a favourite spot for them, it’s not their back garden, and I haven’t noticed them using it much, but then I have not looked or watched them closely, because I value such privacy myself.
The request from the neighbour that is most revealing, perhaps… “we want to know why you feel the need to do this”. Clearly the act would have some meaning for them that it doesn’t for us, I guess.
We moved in recently-ish, and their previous neighbours were I think fairly close friends, and had been here a long time. We are also not from the area. It’s hard to feel these factors are not playing in to this.
I think I would approach them cordially and say that the standard fence heights are 5ft and 6ft, legally you can go up to 2m, and you want to increase privacy in line with normal accepted standards, however you understand they have some reservations so can they explain how this would affect them?
Then if they come up with something valid you can decide whether to factor it in to your decision, if it’s all emotive and threatening then I’d just say something along the lines of “you haven’t given me a reasonable justification for not going ahead, so ill be making my own decision.”
People are wierd. I’ve had neighbours express extremely strong opinions about what they think I should/should not do with my property - I just tell them firmly it’s my property and (ensuring I understand the legal position) I can do what I like.
I would never dream of telling my neighbours what I think they should do to/on their property to maintain/improve my amenity, but from experience a lot of people (mainly older ones IME) seem very happy to do so. I’ve even had it twice on the day I was moving in - first contact with a neighbour was them asking me to address some petty grievance they had with the previous owner over a tree/wall/fence etc.!
Then if they come up with something valid you can decide whether to factor it in to your decision, if it’s all emotive and threatening then I’d just say something along the lines of “you haven’t given me a reasonable justification for not going ahead, so ill be making my own decision.”
People are wierd. I’ve had neighbours express extremely strong opinions about what they think I should/should not do with my property - I just tell them firmly it’s my property and (ensuring I understand the legal position) I can do what I like.
I would never dream of telling my neighbours what I think they should do to/on their property to maintain/improve my amenity, but from experience a lot of people (mainly older ones IME) seem very happy to do so. I’ve even had it twice on the day I was moving in - first contact with a neighbour was them asking me to address some petty grievance they had with the previous owner over a tree/wall/fence etc.!
Chrisgr31 said:
Why doesn’t your garden feel private if the wall is 5ft high. Only anyone standing very close to it will be able to see over it in to your garden.
Because the arrangement on the other side of the wall is such that everything is very close to it. But also, FEELING private and secluded is not the same as BEING private and secluded.
Just the possibility of being observed, rather than the likelihood or actuality of it, removes the feeling of privacy.
You need to work out a simple equation, which is more important to you….
1) relationship with neighbour
Or
2) you own desire for the wall
If (1j you then have a secondary question about whether you will stop your plans completely to please the neighbour or reach try to reach a compromise.
If it were me I would be very clear in my own head about my personal red line and then move from there.
My approach would be to speak with the neighbour, telling them that I am going to build my wall but wanted to understand what their concerns were and seeing if I could perhaps incorporate something that would help them out. Clearly if this meant it costing more they would no doubt want to contribute to that additional cost.
1) relationship with neighbour
Or
2) you own desire for the wall
If (1j you then have a secondary question about whether you will stop your plans completely to please the neighbour or reach try to reach a compromise.
If it were me I would be very clear in my own head about my personal red line and then move from there.
My approach would be to speak with the neighbour, telling them that I am going to build my wall but wanted to understand what their concerns were and seeing if I could perhaps incorporate something that would help them out. Clearly if this meant it costing more they would no doubt want to contribute to that additional cost.
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