Moving back

[smifffymoto]

I’m considering moving back home,the dream is over.

Last week Mrs S passed away aged 52. We live here with our 2 children 22 and 24 years old and Nic’s Dad.

I don’t worry about moving back as such,I worry about what would happen if something happened to me.The kids couldn’t afford to run the house anymore than my FIL,so would forced to sell and have no support.

TBH my thoughts are scrambled at the moment and I have no plan,we just started a new business which I don’t want to do on my own,it was our business but then,everything was “ours” not mine or yours.

I will probably add to this when my mind isn’t a jumbled mess.

[LastPoster]

Hi smiffy

I’m sorry to hear of your loss. Been in the same situation myself (lost my wife last year, not the thinking of moving part) I think the best piece of advice I could give you is to not do anything in a rush. As you say (and it’s to be expected) you are all over the place. Don’t do anything at haste you might regret

Take care

[rdjohn]

So sad to hear of your loss. Yours was the dread scenario that encouraged our return last year age 71. We did not have kids to consider.

Life is far from a panacea in the UK, but a 3-week holiday back in France in June did not make us think we had made a bad decision.

You are entering another phase of your life, you need time to think hard to think about what new opportunities may lie ahead, for the whole family.

Best wishes

[harrycovert]

Sorry to hear about your loss I would echo what was said before and don't do anything in haste How do the children feel about going back do they have friends in the UK ? Bon courage.

[Mr Magooagain]

So sorry to read this Smiffy,please accept our condolences.
I've been thinking about you and your wife this last week or so after you had mentioned about her in another thread.

My only advice at this moment is for you to make sure you are briefed up on the inheritance situation here,act quickly and get advice if you haven't done so already.

All the very best.

[Muzzer79]

Sorry to hear about your loss.

Being as it was so recent, my only advice would be to allow yourself some more time before making big decisions like re-locating.

[leyorkie]

So sorry to hear this Smiffy, last I read she had been taken in to hospital.
I’m same age as Rodger and we’re looking to sell soon, I had a hospital scare 2 years ago 10 days in intensive care in Le Mans hospital.
That made me think how my wife would cope with selling up etc, it’s not as simple as buying.
We’ve just had the fosse inspected and then we’re upgrading windows for the energy report,
What was acceptable 20 years ago isn’t nowadays.
You have got to think of the kids but please don’t rush into anything.

Best wishes for the future

[LesXRN]

Sincere condolences Smiffy.
I think the advice given so far is correct.
Bonne chance.

[smifffymoto]

I will give it a bit and see how I feel but I and the kids don’t really see France in our future.

[Fatt McMissile]

I'm so sorry to hear of your and your family's loss and join the others on here in offering my thoughts and condolences.

Everyone's situation is different and I have no advice to offer save to echo those who say take your time before taking the big decisions.

Steve

[WyrleyD]

Rick, very sad to hear your news. We will be down to the Haute-Vienne/Dordogne borders at the end of the month if you want to chat. we moved back to the UK in 2019 after15 years in France so have recent experience.

[Mike-tf3n0]

Really sorry to read this, we have a couple of friends here who are in the same position and are helping to prop up one of them who is not coping well so are familiar with your situation. As others have said take your time. We wish you well in whatever direction your life will now take you.

[smifffymoto]

Well things are moving along now.

We accepted an offer for the house and are in the UK house hunting for a week.

We started packing up months ago as it gave us something to do and it also helped us with our grief and loss.

So,Cheshire here we come!

It’s been an eventful 15 years but I’m ready to leave it all behind and start fresh,only taking my good memories and selling all the crap we accumulated.

[LesXRN]

Good luck with the move. Cheshire and all it has to offer is the thing we miss most living here in France.

[rdjohn]

smifffymoto said:

Well things are moving along now.

We accepted an offer for the house and are in the UK house hunting for a week.

We started packing up months ago as it gave us something to do and it also helped us with our grief and loss.

So,Cheshire here we come!

It’s been an eventful 15 years but I’m ready to leave it all behind and start fresh,only taking my good memories and selling all the crap we accumulated.

So pleased that you have things sorted and are slowly returning from the abyss.

Good luck with your future plans.

[harrycovert]

Good luck, I hope everything goes well for you

[Mr Magooagain]

All the very best Smiffy.

[smifffymoto]

Well ,here we are,back in the UK.
On Thursday last,I got the call from my solicitor we would complete on Friday.The cleaner was already in so all was good there.I made the decision that was it,Friday was D-day,I was off.
Got up at the crack of dawn and started loading the van.
I was done for 12.30 but the cat had other ideas,she waltzed back in at 2.30 and was promptly bundled into the cat carrier.

That was it,I locked the door and left.

I stopped at Vierzon for fuel and booked the 1.16 tunnel which actually left at 12.30 because there was only 4 vehicles on it( not a typo).
I had to stop a couple of times because I was nodding off but better safe than dead.

My french house should have sold last week but the buyers bank are playing silly buggers so who knows when it will go through. I have to go back for the acte final,it’s a pain but hey ho.

I have been back a weekend,to the same Cheshire village we left 15 years ago and it feels right,everything is familiar and my family all live here.
I don’t have any regrets moving back,it’s the right thing for me as life in France just wasn’t the same without Mrs S.

[rdjohn]

I hope that everything goes well for you and family from hereon. The change of home should help you get over the loss of your wife.

The only regret that we have is the weather in Cheshire. When you are retired it is so important and, so far this summer, it has been pretty dire.

We holidayed in France during June and the warm weather was such a pleasure, driving top-down.

Anyway, you are back just in time to vote, “things can only get better”.

Bon chance!

Edited by rdjohn on Wednesday 3rd July 13:58

[Esquire]

smifffymoto said:

Well ,here we are,back in the UK.
On Thursday last,I got the call from my solicitor we would complete on Friday.The cleaner was already in so all was good there.I made the decision that was it,Friday was D-day,I was off.
Got up at the crack of dawn and started loading the van.
I was done for 12.30 but the cat had other ideas,she waltzed back in at 2.30 and was promptly bundled into the cat carrier.

That was it,I locked the door and left.

I stopped at Vierzon for fuel and booked the 1.16 tunnel which actually left at 12.30 because there was only 4 vehicles on it( not a typo).
I had to stop a couple of times because I was nodding off but better safe than dead.

My french house should have sold last week but the buyers bank are playing silly buggers so who knows when it will go through. I have to go back for the acte final,it’s a pain but hey ho.

I have been back a weekend,to the same Cheshire village we left 15 years ago and it feels right,everything is familiar and my family all live here.
I don’t have any regrets moving back,it’s the right thing for me as life in France just wasn’t the same without Mrs S.

Good luck with everything Smiffy