When has your baby shown you up?
Discussion
Now we've all done it haven't we? Either blasting down a sunny serpentinne country lane by ourselves, or when attempting to show a friend we can achieve the perfect tail-slide a-la Tiff Nedell. Just push it that bit too far and end up making a right dog's breakfast of it. My own personal experience came late one night when blasting over the Christchurch port-hills in the TR with a mate in the passengers seat after I found out the Mrs had been getting nookie elsewhere for some time (NEVER the best state of mind to drive in!). 250m straight leading into a 35km/h hairpin right, throw her in, compression lock the rears momentarily to kick the tail out, holding the drift perfectly though the corner, feeding the power in then BAM!.... I hit a white line in the middle of the road still wet from recent rain and she starts to go around. I spin the wheel and catch it but over-correct and decide that it's best ust to give up at this point. End up sliding to a halt with the rear tyres parked on the apex of the bend with the car facing radially OUTWARDS (I challenge any of you to lose it and end up in this position because to this day I have no idea how it happened.). thankfully my mate was rather inebriated and he was rather impressed and even asked me to do it again! I declined and then drove home rather slowly......
c'mon guys..... surely I'm not the only one to have been shown up like this before am I?
c'mon guys..... surely I'm not the only one to have been shown up like this before am I?
A friend of a friend offered me a go in his HSR chevette about 9 years ago , never one to say no i had a go , Lost it big time on a bend that seemed to open out but tightened up and lost it big time tried opposite lock etc , just sat there for a second laughing , one of the best cars ive driven (doesnt say a lot does it 
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>> Edited by dennisthemenace on Wednesday 25th September 00:09
) >> Edited by dennisthemenace on Wednesday 25th September 00:09
quote:
A friend of a friend offered me a go in his HSR chevette about 9 years ago , never one to say no i had a go , Lost it big time on a bend that seemed to open out but tightened up and lost it big time tried opposite lock etc , just sat there for a second laughing , one of the best cars ive driven (doesnt say a lot does it
>> Edited by dennisthemenace on Wednesday 25th September 00:09
The HSR Chevette was 'one mean mota' and matched the Lotus Sunbeam for fun, 150bhp and RWD in a lightish body.
In my early 20's driving my BMW, country lane on Hayling with girlfriend (now wife) decided to give it large round a 90 degree bend in the damp. Superb tail out slide all the way round and held it nicely along the straight, got too cocky gave it a little more and completed a full 180 and continued back the way I came.
We were both suitably impresed and she asked if I could do it again, being the gentleman that I am I was happy to oblige, except this time I got part way through the bend the rears gripped and catapulted me head-long into the hedge right on the apex. Quick reverse out and nothing damaged except a bit of pride!
We were both suitably impresed and she asked if I could do it again, being the gentleman that I am I was happy to oblige, except this time I got part way through the bend the rears gripped and catapulted me head-long into the hedge right on the apex. Quick reverse out and nothing damaged except a bit of pride!
December 1988 near Winchester. On a Motor Club Treasure Hunt with Portsmouth Poly. (the college, not a sailor's parrot). Thought my rear tyres looked a bit flat before we set off but was running late so just left them. About 10.30 pm, freezing cold conditions I gave it large around a left hand bend a 'la rally style' having already successfully hanging the back on numerous other tight bends that evening. Except....the back went a bit TOO wide on this go. Steered into the skid, over corrected, car skids the other way. Perfect 180 degree spin, and then slid off the road down the side of a hill below the bend. Managed to park my lovely Vauxhall Cavalier 2000 GLS Sports Hatch ( an Opel Manta by any other name) - on its side - right between two oak trees.
A well off passer by was driving by and we managed to flag him down. He was the first person I had ever met who had a carphone. Soon after our treasure hunting colleages arrived at the scene - followed by 3 panda cars, 1 traffic car and an ambulance.
Embarrassed to say the least. But I still came off better than the person who wrote his escort off on the Halloween Treasure Hunt and arrived in casualty dressed as Dracula. Oh to be a student again.
>> Edited by bryanlister on Wednesday 25th September 09:37
>> Edited by bryanlister on Wednesday 25th September 09:39
A well off passer by was driving by and we managed to flag him down. He was the first person I had ever met who had a carphone. Soon after our treasure hunting colleages arrived at the scene - followed by 3 panda cars, 1 traffic car and an ambulance.
Embarrassed to say the least. But I still came off better than the person who wrote his escort off on the Halloween Treasure Hunt and arrived in casualty dressed as Dracula. Oh to be a student again.
>> Edited by bryanlister on Wednesday 25th September 09:37
>> Edited by bryanlister on Wednesday 25th September 09:39
At an ACU testing day on a circuit I knew very well with a friend who had only just got his race license, had never been to that circuit before and was having a few problems getting the lines right. I gave it the big I am, been here before dozens of times and came out with the the quote "just follow my lines" went out on a fresh session straight into a gentle right followed by long start finish straight, gives it large 130+ pops up from behind screen hits front brake followed by tarmac/sky/tarmac/sky/grass.....As I slid on my arse I can remember making eye contact with him following me still upright eyes bulging with look of sheer terror. Got back to the pit lane to be greated with much laughter and the quote of "do excuse me for not following that line". Two lessons learnt that day 1) never gob off about how quick you are and 2) always plug your tyre warmers back in after a session and check they've done their job !!
2000, when we had snow, I found a nice huge car park in my GTIR. It was Bolton Wanderers stadium and the snow was a good couple of inches thick, unfortunately the Nova boys had found it too, so while they spent their time on on section driving up to silly speeds and then making the car spin and spin, I found an empty part of the car park and carried out some beautiful ballerina like power slides, perfect circle donuts and the like, with the little R popping and crackling like the little b*tch she was. Shortly after I decided to make my way home. All trhe Nova boys were suitably impressed, as were me and my mate, it had been an absolute hoot. Anyway, with everyone looking on in awe and admiration, on my way out I brake while putting my seatbelt on, all four wheels lock up on ice and I slide at 5mph into a kerb. Two scratched wheels and a big dent in the pride.
As for my baby letting me down, in the integrale, lots of boyracers around and an Escort cosworth pulls up next to me at some lights. The lights are straight into quite a long off camber sorner. I very successfully dispatch of said cosworth with a lovely controlled slide after the road goes off camber, compared to his braking as he shat himself. Anyway, I turn off into a side street on the way to the pub and then it happens, the car just dies, nothing. Turns out to be a fuel system problem. The showing me up part came when I was towed past all the Maxy P Kn*bs, including the Escort 
As for my baby letting me down, in the integrale, lots of boyracers around and an Escort cosworth pulls up next to me at some lights. The lights are straight into quite a long off camber sorner. I very successfully dispatch of said cosworth with a lovely controlled slide after the road goes off camber, compared to his braking as he shat himself
. Anyway, I turn off into a side street on the way to the pub and then it happens, the car just dies, nothing. Turns out to be a fuel system problem. The showing me up part came when I was towed past all the Maxy P Kn*bs, including the Escort I was the passenger in this one. Was second year of uni in the late 80's, mate borrowed his moms bmw 323 and decides to give to large down a slip lane onto a 4 lane road out of Durban with plenty of spectators stopped at the traffic lights. Car went very sideways in a great powerslide then snapped around in a perfect 360. Best part was having everyone keep there distance from us for the next few kilometers.
Only a spectator for this but worth a mention none the less.
Walking into the train station yesterday I am struck by the fact that as I walk along the pavement theres some kid on a 50cc scooter comming directly at me. Now he's approaching the kerb at 90 degrees about 25 mph. At this point I realise I am next to the motor bike parking bay and he's just about to park an is giving it some to prove his coolness. Any way he yams on the back brake and does one of those Russ Swift 180's ending with him going backwards in the motor cylce bay. Pretty cool I think. Didn't know a moped could do that when his back wheel hits the kerb and throws him on his arse on the pavement in front of me.
Nearly wet myself laughing, and boy was he upset.
>> Edited by adamb on Wednesday 25th September 10:55
Walking into the train station yesterday I am struck by the fact that as I walk along the pavement theres some kid on a 50cc scooter comming directly at me. Now he's approaching the kerb at 90 degrees about 25 mph. At this point I realise I am next to the motor bike parking bay and he's just about to park an is giving it some to prove his coolness. Any way he yams on the back brake and does one of those Russ Swift 180's ending with him going backwards in the motor cylce bay. Pretty cool I think. Didn't know a moped could do that when his back wheel hits the kerb and throws him on his arse on the pavement in front of me.
Nearly wet myself laughing, and boy was he upset.
>> Edited by adamb on Wednesday 25th September 10:55
While driving along the coast road into Malaga in an XJS in the pissing rain I ignore the sign saying slow dangerous bend, thinking "I am not in a euro shitbox I'll be fine" To cut a long story short, I lose the back end completely, add lots of opposite lock and stop it spinning into the concrete wall, but it takes a couple of hundred yards to get it back into control.
I had thought that the two passengers were sleeping, and looked round to see they were OK, Both were now wide awake with eyes like dinnerplates. One simply said "nicely caught, don't do it again"
Lol, the dumb stuff you get up to in cars:
Its Scotland, 2 foot of snow, and in a residential area. I'm out in my Dad's landrover (due to snow) enjoying the fact that im one of the only vehicles out. Im driving down a modern residential area and it starts snowing, cool. Out of nowhere comes this white corsa, never saw it. I slam on the anchors and a couple of tons of steel turns worryingly quickly into a 90degree slide...for the micra. Luckily, it turns further, drifting off the street into a garden, it comes to halt, nothing but pride damaged. Very embarrassingly wave "sorry."
Its Scotland, 2 foot of snow, and in a residential area. I'm out in my Dad's landrover (due to snow) enjoying the fact that im one of the only vehicles out. Im driving down a modern residential area and it starts snowing, cool. Out of nowhere comes this white corsa, never saw it. I slam on the anchors and a couple of tons of steel turns worryingly quickly into a 90degree slide...for the micra. Luckily, it turns further, drifting off the street into a garden, it comes to halt, nothing but pride damaged. Very embarrassingly wave "sorry."
I also got caught put by a patch of spilled diesel on Wood Street in the City. It was just where the road makes a nice sharp 90 degree bend.
I was following one of those big LDV police transporters full of City police. As he went round the corner he caught the diesel and began to spin, just as I was looking at him spin and thinking that this was a story for the pub, the same happened to me - I should mention I was in Spitfire at the time so once spinning you are really just along for the ride - I was carrying a little more speed into the corner so passed the spinning coppers who looked like socks in a washing machine at this point and came to a halt a good turn and a half later facing the wrong way in a parking bay. The police van hit a lamppost.
Turned out that a truck had hit a traffic island and dropped a tank of diesel, nobody thought to clear it up as it was the weekend.
I was following one of those big LDV police transporters full of City police. As he went round the corner he caught the diesel and began to spin, just as I was looking at him spin and thinking that this was a story for the pub, the same happened to me - I should mention I was in Spitfire at the time so once spinning you are really just along for the ride - I was carrying a little more speed into the corner so passed the spinning coppers who looked like socks in a washing machine at this point and came to a halt a good turn and a half later facing the wrong way in a parking bay. The police van hit a lamppost.
Turned out that a truck had hit a traffic island and dropped a tank of diesel, nobody thought to clear it up as it was the weekend.
Different baby but makes me laugh every time...
Was stood in the queue at the post office with all the old folk getting their pensions etc and in front of us was a young Orthodox Jewish man wearing traditional black clothes, hat and of course ringlets and full beard. My then 5-year old found the whole spectacle quite fascinating and the young man asked if she was looking at his clothes and his hat etc. He went on to explain why he dressed that way and also why he didn't cut his hair, hence the beard.
When he'd finished my daughter said to him:
"My Mum has a beard.... in her pants!"
You should have seen the faces on the folk in the queue - priceless
Was stood in the queue at the post office with all the old folk getting their pensions etc and in front of us was a young Orthodox Jewish man wearing traditional black clothes, hat and of course ringlets and full beard. My then 5-year old found the whole spectacle quite fascinating and the young man asked if she was looking at his clothes and his hat etc. He went on to explain why he dressed that way and also why he didn't cut his hair, hence the beard.
When he'd finished my daughter said to him:
"My Mum has a beard.... in her pants!"
You should have seen the faces on the folk in the queue - priceless
I was heading down the A1 towards Harrogate for the RAC rally in the TR7. It was the year there was loads of snow on the Sunday. As we were going slow, everyone following the single tracks, a couple of people decided to overtake albeit at around 25-30mph.
I too pulled out to overtake. As soon as I hit the fresh snow, the car promptly snapped its ar5e end and we ended up going down the A1 at 90 degrees to the road.
Luckily I managed to hold it and recovered back into my original place in the line of traffic and kept it at a steady 20mph.
The GF (now wife) was NOT impressed.
I too pulled out to overtake. As soon as I hit the fresh snow, the car promptly snapped its ar5e end and we ended up going down the A1 at 90 degrees to the road.
Luckily I managed to hold it and recovered back into my original place in the line of traffic and kept it at a steady 20mph.
The GF (now wife) was NOT impressed.
A little argument with the Mrs, nothing serious but enough to put me in a bad mood, and off I set to work with the bit between my teeth. Work my frustrations out by blasting past a numptie. Feeling calmer take my favourite tight (oo er) right-hander on the way to work slower than normal.
It had rained hard the night before and as I came out the corner I went through standing water all across my side of the road (never been there to that degree before or since).
Back steps out completely unexpected and I control my bowel and apply opp-lock. I slide sideways down the road waiting for it to grip and swing the other way. However, only the back grips and she plows straight on across the road despite opp-lock (lucky no oncoming, or even worse a cyclist) and gracefully spins to a standstill in hedgerow. Rather surprised numptie comes round the corner to see me parked facing the oppositng direction.
Bashed three sides of the car that cost the insurance man serious money to put right (only 6 months old too).
Morals of the story:
1) driving and bad moods don't mix.
2) driving and showing-off don't mix (though I've have so far got away with all the close one caused by this failing).
3) 4WD doesn't mean you can completely ignore the weather.
Maf
It had rained hard the night before and as I came out the corner I went through standing water all across my side of the road (never been there to that degree before or since).
Back steps out completely unexpected and I control my bowel and apply opp-lock. I slide sideways down the road waiting for it to grip and swing the other way. However, only the back grips and she plows straight on across the road despite opp-lock (lucky no oncoming, or even worse a cyclist) and gracefully spins to a standstill in hedgerow. Rather surprised numptie comes round the corner to see me parked facing the oppositng direction.
Bashed three sides of the car that cost the insurance man serious money to put right (only 6 months old too).
Morals of the story:
1) driving and bad moods don't mix.
2) driving and showing-off don't mix (though I've have so far got away with all the close one caused by this failing).
3) 4WD doesn't mean you can completely ignore the weather.
Maf
Hehehe just remembered this one... was in my mates rally car, just put the new suspension in so we took it for a test drive..... out in the country, pissing down with rain... he's got some old crap road tyres on instead of his usual gravel tyres..... come to do a u-turn, pulls off the road (large grass verge on either side) and then begins the u-turn, off the grass, back across the road onto the grass on the other side (racing perpendicular to the road) he plants boot to swing it round and the bald road tyres sledge instead of swinging the tail round, he backs out and dabs the brakes and manages to slide at about 5mph for about 10 metres until we hit a lamp post..... to this day he still gets upset when i remind him about it :P
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