Humans? Doomed to stupidity?

Humans? Doomed to stupidity?

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Discussion

Podie

Original Poster:

46,644 posts

281 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
Bit of friday cheer! As proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity and that natural selection doesn't work... here's proof! (can you add any?)


On a Sear's hairdryer "do not use while sleeping"oh, my bad

On a bag of Doritos "you could be a winner! no purchase necessary, details inside!" shoplifter special?

On dial soap "use like regular soap" er..?

Swanson frozen meal "Serving suggestion: defrost" but it's only a SUGGESTION!

Tesco's Tiramisu (printed on the bottom) "do not turn upside down" d'oh!

M&S bread and butter pudding "Product will be hot after heating" oh, I thought...

Rowenta iron packaging "do not iron clothes on body" so THAT's where I've been going wrong!

Boot's Children's cough medicine "do not drive a car or operate heavy machinery after taking this medication" phew, that'll stop all those 5 year olds!

Nytol (sleep aid) "Warning: may cause drowsiness" nuts, I'm taking this because...

Sainsbury's peanuts "warning, contains nuts" ?

American Airlines peanuts "Instructions: open packet, eat nuts" 3... fly BA

On a child's Superman cossie "Wearing this garment does not enable you to fly" I blame the parents here..

On a Swedish chainsaw "do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals" OK any Swedes like to explain this one to me?

People eh?

plotloss

67,280 posts

276 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
My favourite one of these:

On Sunmaid Raisins.

'Why not toss over your favourite breakfast cereal?'



Matt.

mondeoman

11,430 posts

272 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

My favourite one of these:

On Sunmaid Raisins.

'Why not toss over your favourite breakfast cereal?'



Matt.



WOuld you like cream with that sir?

marki

15,763 posts

276 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

On a Swedish chainsaw "do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals" OK any Swedes like to explain this one to me?





I am English but live in Sweden , if you lived in Sweden you would understand

loudpedal

3,928 posts

275 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

My favourite one of these:

On Sunmaid Raisins.

'Why not toss over your favourite breakfast cereal?'



Matt.



ROFLMFAO!!!!

scruff400

3,757 posts

267 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

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Source: Only in America topic, July 2002.

Podie

Original Poster:

46,644 posts

281 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
I once got asked by one of my American colleagues if the Cotswold's closed on Sundays...

Nevin

2,999 posts

267 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
The Peanuts may contain nuts warning is actually quite sensible, as it is not usually peanuts which cause anaphylaxia, as they do not contain the right compounds, but the traces of other nights which do contain these compunds with which the peanuts inevitably become contaminated when being packed in a nut processing plant.

You see.

Chainsaws and genitals though???

Podie

Original Poster:

46,644 posts

281 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

The Peanuts may contain nuts warning is actually quite sensible, as it is not usually peanuts which cause anaphylaxia, as they do not contain the right compounds, but the traces of other nights which do contain these compunds with which the peanuts inevitably become contaminated when being packed in a nut processing plant.

You see.



Hmm.. sort of. Still you'd HOPE that people would have enough sense to put 2 and 2 together... peaNUT = nut

Fer

7,731 posts

286 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:



Hmm.. sort of. Still you'd HOPE that people would have enough sense to put 2 and 2 together... peaNUT = nut



Didn't we cover this one a few weeks back? peaNUT <> nut.

Podie

Original Poster:

46,644 posts

281 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

Didn't we cover this one a few weeks back? peaNUT <> nut.



Nevin

2,999 posts

267 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
Admittedly, it shoudl probably say, "May contain traces of other nuts".

Although I seem to recall that a peanut is not strictly a nut anwyay. Hmmm

toyracer

177 posts

268 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

quote:

Didn't we cover this one a few weeks back? peaNUT <> nut.






no idea - but peanuts are not strictly nuts. unlike some people i work with.

www.hungrymonster.com/FoodFacts/Food_Facts.cfm?Phrase_vch=Peanuts&fid=5589

Podie

Original Poster:

46,644 posts

281 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

Although I seem to recall that a peanut is not strictly a nut anwyay. Hmmm



Can... open.... worms... everywhere...

Nevin

2,999 posts

267 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
Hah, beat you to it toyracer

Gaffer

7,156 posts

283 months

Friday 20th September 2002
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I remember setting fire to them in biology.

I only like the coating on Honey Roasted Nuts.

Just thought you would like to know.

Fer

7,731 posts

286 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

I remember setting fire to them in biology.

I only like the coating on Honey Roasted Nuts.

Just thought you would like to know.


Let's hope Mr Mungo Knob gag is not around, I am sure he would have something to add to this. (OK, I would normally too, but am in hiding from Ted in case he disconnects me.) I will try and save the jokes for the Sean C thread.

Fer

>> Edited by Fer to correct his terrible grammar on Friday 20th September 12:15

>> Edited by Fer on Friday 20th September 12:16

Podie

Original Poster:

46,644 posts

281 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:


Let's hope Mr Mungo Knob gag is not around, I am sure he would have something to add to this. (OK, I would normally too, but am in hiding from Ted in case he disconnects me.) I will try and save the jokes for the Sean C thread.

Fer



I dropped in an offend "knob gag" in another thread and got binned...

:getscoat:
fftohaveacoldshower:
:crawlsunderhisrock:

toyracer

177 posts

268 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
quote:

Hah, beat you to it toyracer



warning: toyracer may be nuts.

GrahamJay

5,420 posts

265 months

Friday 20th September 2002
quotequote all
I had a classic microsnot balls up a couple of weeks ago:

Keyboard not been detected, press F1 for help!

Classic!