Sourrounded by spanners
Discussion
Does anyone else seem to be sourrounded at work by people who talk bollox all day at the top of their voice and basically get on your nerves. There is one bloke in particular, who looks like a cross between Mr Bean and Wendal Spanswick. He just pontificates all day louder than anyone else and I want to stab him with a pick axe.
why cant I work with normal people.
why cant I work with normal people.
Yep - there's a bloke opposite me who talks to himself all day... and when he talks to me, it's at the same volume in the same tone, so I never know if he's talking to me or not.. I gave up...
I just wear headphones now (with or without music playing), which provides me with the perfect excuse to ignore him completely.
I just wear headphones now (with or without music playing), which provides me with the perfect excuse to ignore him completely.
quote:Everything. I loathe and detest them...
what is it about 'open plan offices' that is so hateful?
(i) Background chatter
(ii) Telephone conversations
(iii) Mobile Phone stupid musical ringtones
(iv) People eating (usually smelly) lunch right in your face
(v) One size fits all temperature
(vi) Piss poor flourescent tube lights
(vii) Difficulties concealing extensive PH patronage
Ill swap you - and give you a choice from the wonders of my office
yr spanner for
1) Joe Ninty - Billy Bunter cross who thinks he owns the company large girth and mouth to match
2)couple of just left school larger louts who know everthing about anything - spend a lot of time on their moblies though
3) a nice lady but a bit of a lush - picks her spots, tweezers hairs out of her legs and uses my scissors to cut the hard skin off her feet or cut her toenails (yes this is performed in the office usually just before lunch as after she gets her cusion out and sleeps for an hour)
yr spanner for
1) Joe Ninty - Billy Bunter cross who thinks he owns the company large girth and mouth to match
2)couple of just left school larger louts who know everthing about anything - spend a lot of time on their moblies though
3) a nice lady but a bit of a lush - picks her spots, tweezers hairs out of her legs and uses my scissors to cut the hard skin off her feet or cut her toenails (yes this is performed in the office usually just before lunch as after she gets her cusion out and sleeps for an hour)
quote:
3) a nice lady but a bit of a lush - picks her spots, tweezers hairs out of her legs and uses my scissors to cut the hard skin off her feet or cut her toenails (yes this is performed in the office usually just before lunch as after she gets her cusion out and sleeps for an hour)
Atleast shes quiet.
quote:
quote:At my last company I drowned an 8210 in a cup of water from the cooler and permanently dismanted someone's 5110.
(I have threatened to take a hammer to them in some case, or drop them out the window, or see how they cope with being dunked in the water cooler!)
top effort. Last week, the new guy in the department had his phone swatted at with a rolled up copy of the Tory-graph (it was the nearest thing to hand, and didn't want to trash my copy of Evo).
Damn thing made a right racket! Some stupid tone and then it buzzed (vibrated) over the desk... it got a right pasting!
Guy who sits next to me (other side) looks at new guy (who is looking a little shocked) goes "Podie doesn't like loud mobiles" swings back on his chair and carrys on.
New guy is wary of me now...
not heard a peep from said phone since! 
quote:
quote:At my last company I drowned an 8210 in a cup of water from the cooler and permanently dismanted someone's 5110.
(I have threatened to take a hammer to them in some case, or drop them out the window, or see how they cope with being dunked in the water cooler!
'Last' company. Says it all
Seriously though, how did you manage to get away with this? Or are you Billy no mates at work?
T/.
quote:Well first of all, anyone who's moronic enough to leave a phone on their desk playing piss-poor transpositions of R&B songs is no friend of mine.
'Last' company. Says it all
Seriously though, how did you manage to get away with this? Or are you Billy no mates at work?
Secondly, I'm gonna shed no tears if someone decides to give me a wide berth because I let off some steam occasionally. They're pussies anyway who just love the status quo and being kicked about by management and other assorted retards.
Not that it winds me up though
I got me jammer on the internet.. about £100.. not cheap, but how many ways are there to totally control your environment by stealth??
Oh, and it's my 'last' company because it's in London and when I moved out of London last year I was only too happy to sever all links with that pit of hell city. When I handed in my notice, my director sat me down and asked if there was any way I could be persuaded to stay. The only thing which would have persuaded my would be for him to sack his senior manager who I hated with an unrivalled passion.
>> Edited by CarZee on Monday 16th September 15:16
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