I give up!

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PetrolTed

Original Poster:

34,443 posts

310 months

Wednesday 30th May 2001
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Agony column coming soon! This is the sort of mail I get these days! "I need to obtain a replacement "eyeball" ventilation socket for my Mark V Cortina. I see that you have the part listed on your web site. I don''t know if they came in different colours but the part I need is black plastic. I would be grateful if you quote for the above part if in stock. Any advise on how to fit the thing greatly appreciated as I can''t actually see how to remove the old one! " Heeeeelp!

jsg

2,238 posts

290 months

Thursday 31st May 2001
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quote:
.........Any advise on how to fit the thing greatly appreciated as I can''t actually see how to remove the old one! " Heeeeelp!
Best way to remove the old one is as follows : Tools 6 pack of Stella Family size pork pie 1 gallon of petrol length of timber folding bicycle Method Put tools in car, drive to Beachy Head or similar shear drop, soak dashboard around eyeball vent with the petrol, use timber to wedge accelerator down with car in gear, ignition on, push start car (usual procedure), sit down drink beer and eat pie whilst watching first flight of car (as per caption competition), finish picnic then when fire is out you should be able to prise eyball vent out of molten heap at the bottom of the drop. Finally cycle home and GET A LIFE !

PetrolTed

Original Poster:

34,443 posts

310 months

Thursday 31st May 2001
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quote:
Family size pork pie 1 gallon of petrol
Did you know the jelly in pork pies is made with the trotters..?

Marshy

2,749 posts

291 months

Thursday 31st May 2001
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Hey. At least you don't get starving russian programmers e-mailing you CVs asking for jobs. Sheesh...

apache

39,731 posts

291 months

Thursday 31st May 2001
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thats it, I'm going veggie!

macwalsh

119 posts

285 months

Thursday 31st May 2001
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Quote: "Did you know the jelly in pork pies is made with the trotters..?" What, Del Boy and Rodney? Edited by macwalsh on Thursday 31st May 15:10

Don

28,377 posts

291 months

Thursday 31st May 2001
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Does that happen to you too, Marshy? We get that all the time...and a lot worse that I won't admit to...because....ss well as business software we do stuff for the domestic market. Man the public are WEIRD!
quote:
Hey. At least you don't get starving russian programmers e-mailing you CVs asking for jobs. Sheesh...

PetrolTed

Original Poster:

34,443 posts

310 months

Thursday 31st May 2001
quotequote all
I ended up working with a whole bunch of Russian programmers (back when I had a proper job). Too clever for their own good. Rather fond of over-engineering everything. I could never take anyone seriously called Igor either