best motoring quote

[dans]

A.A.Gill on the relative aural pleasures of some nice cars from the current CAR magazine;

'If a Ferrari is Pavarotti, and a TVR two butch Lesbians making love in a bucket then the AM Vanqush is Tom Jones bending over to pick up the soap in Strangeways' shower block...'


I know there has been a thread like this but this quote appears in the current car and had me in stitches on the train yesterday......

[lrussell5]

poetry

[JonRB]

quote:'If a Ferrari is Pavarotti, and a TVR two butch Lesbians making love in a bucket then the AM Vanqush is Tom Jones bending over to pick up the soap in Strangeways' shower block...'

The thing about metaphor is that it is meant to convey meaning. Just what is the author trying to say? A Ferrari sounds like a fat bloke? A TVR sounds like something physically impossible (how many buckets are big enough to get 2 people in?). An Aston-Martin sounds like buggery?

Nope, got me confused.

[plotloss]

I personally cant get past the mental image of two lesbians having sex in a bucket



Matt.

[lrussell5]

hang on...a ferrari screams like a fat bloke stuck in a bucket, a tvr howls like tom jones being seen to by two lesbians and an aston hurts (the wallet) like buggery? surely

[CarZee]

quote:Nope, got me confused.

Can tell you're a bloody developer..

You have to imagine the *noise* produced by each of these three things..

Ah well, perhaps it's true that metaphors are never universally appreciated..

I thought it a cracker

>> Edited by CarZee on Thursday 30th May 16:27

[apache]

as per the thesaurus maybe, but these days metaphors are used to conjure up mental images that can illustrate a point....or artistic licence perhaps

[dans]

It is an aural metaphor, Mr Pavarotti is a Tenor and his voice has a beautiful powerful tenor bark - bit like a ferrari

Two fat lesbians in a bucket(not size specific - anything bucket shaped like a TVR exhaust will produce reverberations and rutting dykes are a couourful allusion)can be envisaged making quite a racket in a deep sort of way.

Tom jones has a fine set of lungs and can hit a good note - which he would do when being surprsed from behind by big Barry from cell block E.

[lrussell5]

quote:
I personally cant get past the mental image of two lesbians having sex in a bucket



Matt.

how about USING a bucket?

[mattjbatch]

Clarkson on the 355:

quote:
...the feedback from the steering is so good that if I were to run over a small fluffy animal I could not only tell what it was, but also what it had had for breakfast.

[JonRB]

Thanks dans, it all makes sense now. (I think)

[whatever]

That's the kind of insight into the sick mind of the aforementioned Mr Gill I could well do without He always strikes me as a cretin of the highest order.


(I was thinking really about one of those large builders buckets you can get from B+Q. Standing up. Somehow...)

[plotloss]

Could work in a JCB bucket!



Matt.

[flasher]

Some of my fave quotes were in the back of the old Performance Car mag in the bit where they used to review cars...

TVR 400SE.."the automotive equivalent of Arnold Schwarzenegger"

Westfield 1800.... "bloody hell this is quick"
Westfield SEight..."Oh my God we're going to die..."

[plotloss]

I forgot about them, a couple I remember from the same area:

TVR Cerbera 4.5 - A Mistress not a Servant
Bentley Turbo R - Dragster disguised as drawing room.

Matt.

[Roadrunner]

Remember that section describing the supra: it will suck up the road like a vortex

[manek]

'...TVR Griffith rushing to head-butt the horizon...'

[Cotty]

Jeremy Clarkson on the Cerbra

"The interior is like something out of the 50's............the 2050's"

[Steve Harrison]

Years ago CAR went to Germany to try and max a Lotus Carlton on the autobahn. Can't remember the author but there was a wonderful descrption of the shunt he was worried about having when it started to rain "the closest thing to an Indycar accident you can have on a public road"

Went something like "I imagined myself sitting on a soft, brown cushion amidst the rapidly disintegrating remains of a Lotus Carlton"

[Don]

quote:
...the feedback from the steering is so good that if I were to run over a small fluffy animal I could not only tell what it was, but also what it had had for breakfast.

LOL