O/T Why English is so hard to learn
Discussion
This little treat on the lovely language we share is only for the brave. It was passed on by a linguist, original author unknown. Peruse at your leisure, English lovers.
Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
Let's face it -- English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England, nor were French fries invented in France.
Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Havenoses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
P.S. Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick" Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
Reasons why the English language is so hard to learn:
1) The bandage was wound around the wound.
2) The farm was used to produce produce.
3) The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4) We must polish the Polish furniture.
5) He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6) The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7) Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8) A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9) When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10) I did not object to the object.
11) The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12) There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13) They were too close to the door to close it.
14) The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15) A seamstress and a sewer fell down into a sewer line.
16) To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17) The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18) After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19) Upon seeing the tear in the painting I shed a tear.
20) I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21) How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?
Let's face it -- English is a crazy language.
There is no egg in eggplant nor ham in hamburger; neither apple nor pine in pineapple. English muffins weren't invented in England, nor were French fries invented in France.
Sweetmeats are candies, while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.
We take English for granted. But if we explore its paradoxes, we find that quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig. And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce and hammers don't ham?
If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?
One goose, 2 geese. So one moose, 2 meese? One index, 2 indices?
Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends but not one amend. If you have a bunch of odds and ends and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it? If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught? If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?
Sometimes I think all the English speakers should be committed to an asylum for the verbally insane. In what language do people recite at a play and play at a recital? Ship by truck and send cargo by ship? Havenoses that run and feet that smell? How can a slim chance and a fat chance be the same, while a wise man and a wise guy are opposites? You have to marvel at the unique lunacy of a language in which your house can burn up as it burns down, in which you fill in a form by filling it out, and in which an alarm goes off by going on. English was invented by people, not computers, and it reflects the creativity of the human race, which, of course, is not a race at all. That is why, when the stars are out, they are visible, but when the lights are out, they are invisible.
P.S. Why doesn't "Buick" rhyme with "quick" Why do we say something is out of whack? What's a whack?
Not to forget the hundreds of irregular verbs, unique in all languages.
the truth is that English has the capacity to absorb any word from just about any other language, and give it a meaning which is allied to the original, but is of new significance to english speakers.
Also, in what other language is it possible to scrawl four letters all over a city, so that within a day, a new word is introduced into the language? ("QUIZ", invented as a bet, and propogated in Dublin in the mid 19th century).
The most wonderful, idiosyncratic, inventive language - reflects the nation from which it rises.
the truth is that English has the capacity to absorb any word from just about any other language, and give it a meaning which is allied to the original, but is of new significance to english speakers.
Also, in what other language is it possible to scrawl four letters all over a city, so that within a day, a new word is introduced into the language? ("QUIZ", invented as a bet, and propogated in Dublin in the mid 19th century).
The most wonderful, idiosyncratic, inventive language - reflects the nation from which it rises.
quote:
Why does English have just one definite article?
To make it simpler! Russians, Croatians, Japanese can live without any at all. Why, oh why, in God's name, why does German need to have SIXTEEN!!!!!!!!
Incidentally, consider the conjugation of verbs, English is pish easy, compared to eg Italian, French and German and presumably most others except Swedish which is a simplified version of English in that respect.
From speaking to foreigners who've learned, English is fairly easy to learn to a basic level because of this easy basic grammar, but bloody difficult to learn to a high standard because of things like the above examples. Anyone in that position care to comment?
English is the product of many different languages with substantially different structures and grammars. Net result is we have a huge vocabulary, and a relatively simple grammatical framework with tons of inconsistencies. One thing which I noticed having started working for a Swedish firm is the impact of Scandinavian languages. At school we learn French (and maybe Latin) and their enormous contribution to English is self evident, particularly in more sophisticated vocabulary ... but in our core vocab, those words we use most commonly, the Scandinavian impact is at least as strong (or so it seems to me from my position of ignorance).
One example of the diverse vocab sources and the subtelty it lends to English:
Royal, regal, kingly
coming respectively from Latin, French and Norse(?)
Each word synonmous with the rest in their most literal interpretation, except in English they also have an additional layer of meaning which distinguishes them.
One example of the diverse vocab sources and the subtelty it lends to English:
Royal, regal, kingly
coming respectively from Latin, French and Norse(?)
Each word synonmous with the rest in their most literal interpretation, except in English they also have an additional layer of meaning which distinguishes them.
Our language has many roots, going back to basic Indo-European which spread from Asia minor, and some words have remained almost unchanged since then. Latterly, we have produced a mixture of Germanic and the Romance languages (French, Spanish, etc, all based on Latin) which represents the various conquests/colonisations we have undergone. More recently, we have done the colonising and peppered our vocabulary with a scattergun of useful snippets from the countries of the world.
Our language constantly throws up surprises - a slang word for woman here in the People's Republic of South Yorkshire, is "bint" - I was amazed to learn from a Moroccan friend of mine, that it is indeed the Arabic word for woman. Chess comes directly from the Persian word "Shah", meaning king. And so on....
Our common swear words are mostly Anglo-Saxon common parlance - the Normans all spoke French, and only base and vulgar indigenous English spoke the "Olde Englishe." So gradually those words became vulgarities, and finally swearing. Does anyone know where the word "fcuk" originates - I mean it's real meaning, back in time?
>> Edited by nubbin on Tuesday 28th May 22:54
Our language constantly throws up surprises - a slang word for woman here in the People's Republic of South Yorkshire, is "bint" - I was amazed to learn from a Moroccan friend of mine, that it is indeed the Arabic word for woman. Chess comes directly from the Persian word "Shah", meaning king. And so on....
Our common swear words are mostly Anglo-Saxon common parlance - the Normans all spoke French, and only base and vulgar indigenous English spoke the "Olde Englishe." So gradually those words became vulgarities, and finally swearing. Does anyone know where the word "fcuk" originates - I mean it's real meaning, back in time?
>> Edited by nubbin on Tuesday 28th May 22:54
Swedish is a lot like Scots spoken in a Geordie accent!
And apparently during WW1 Scottish soldiers speaking Scots (not Gaelic) could speak to and understand north Germans speaking their dialect ("Plattdeutsch" IIRC)
English has had major influences from, if you think about it, Latin (romans), French (normans), German (angles & saxons), Scandinavian (vikings), Celtic (predating all that), Scots (James VI & I) - a product of being an island and having a turbulent history.
I've heard that modern English is a lot closer to medieval Scots than medieval English ... although that may have been someone stirring the pot!
And apparently during WW1 Scottish soldiers speaking Scots (not Gaelic) could speak to and understand north Germans speaking their dialect ("Plattdeutsch" IIRC)
English has had major influences from, if you think about it, Latin (romans), French (normans), German (angles & saxons), Scandinavian (vikings), Celtic (predating all that), Scots (James VI & I) - a product of being an island and having a turbulent history.
I've heard that modern English is a lot closer to medieval Scots than medieval English ... although that may have been someone stirring the pot!
quote:
Does anyone know where the word "fcuk" originates - I mean it's real meaning, back in time?
IIRC it used to be "suck" and changed with the old style long f which was printed similarly to a cursive style handwritten f and looked a bit like an s ... hope that's clear, hold on I'll inspect the character map on the off chance ...
Can't find character map, where's it gone?
Can't be bothered right now, going to bed (
I should be so lucky)quote:
[...]why does German need to have SIXTEEN!!!!!!!!
I thought it were three
(der, die , das) or do I misconceive sth.? quote:
[...]
From speaking to foreigners who've learned, English is fairly easy to learn to a basic level because of this easy basic grammar, but bloody difficult to learn to a high standard because of things like the above examples. Anyone in that position care to comment?
Yes, I can confirm!
My personal experience is, that English has a very big recognition vocabulary, but native speakers only use a fraction of that.
_________________________________________
quote:
And apparently during WW1 Scottish soldiers speaking Scots (not Gaelic) could speak to and understand north Germans speaking their dialect ("Plattdeutsch" IIRC)
I was quite surprised, when I first recognized north Germans say 'Waterkant (direct: water edge)' instead of "Küste (coast)", meaning "shore"
>> Edited by Bodo on Tuesday 28th May 23:41
quote:
From speaking to foreigners who've learned, English is fairly easy to learn to a basic level because of this easy basic grammar, but bloody difficult to learn to a high standard because of things like the above examples. Anyone in that position care to comment?
I'm fortunate enough to have been spoilt by nature as according to all my French relatives I have a pretty good musical hearing (which by the way helped me learn the basics of playing the guitar in one year
), and this may have helped to learn English quickly as well. I agree that the finer it gets, the more difficult it is to get the subtleties. But as long as I keep reading threads on PH, I don't think I need to take courses in Shakespearian English
IMO the most difficult in the British language is the variation in the accent, not helped by me suffering a terrible lack of speaking practice:
I find Southerners quite easy to understand but the difficulty increases when speaking to Northerners
>> Edited by Thom on Wednesday 29th May 08:26
quote:
And apparently during WW1 Scottish soldiers speaking Scots (not Gaelic) could speak to and understand north Germans speaking their dialect ("Plattdeutsch" IIRC)
Off topic, but IIRC weren't there 4 main languages in scotland - English, Gaelic, Lallens (sp?) and Doric (sp?)?
Language is a funny thing, and as it is living, continually changes to absorb new words from different cultures (no matter how much the French try to stop it
), makes for interesting reading quote:
I find Southerners quite easy to understand but the difficulty increases when speaking to Northerners
Hehe... I think that's true for quite a few of us native Brits. Has anyone tried to interpret what Sara Cox on Radio 1 is going on about? It's not the sort of thing to gently ease me into the morning I do have to say!
quote:
Off topic, but IIRC weren't there 4 main languages in scotland - English, Gaelic, Lallens (sp?) and Doric (sp?)?
Lallans (central scotland) and Doric (north east) are essentially variations of the same, generally known as Scots. Scots and English have a lot of similarities, Gaelic is completely different, a Celtic language almost identical to Irish (sometimes also known as Gaelic). Scots doesn't get much, or any, official recognition, to its detriment.
Although this does bring up the question of when does a dialect beome a seperate language? Many would say that Scots and English are dialects of the same thing, but there are probably more differences between Scots and English than between, say, Norwegian and Danish, or Spanish and Italian.
quote:
Too right... I think she just speaks "youth speak" and I must be getting too old to understand it..
Eeeeeeeelloo.. Chaouwns.... etc. etc.
Matt.
Youth speak? I'm only 24 and I haven't the faintest idea what she's going on about! It doesn't help that she always thinks she's soooooo funny and keeps laughing between words.
Now to be perfectly nationalistic (Scots, no Hibernian in the Latin sense) and definitely non-PC!!!!
Why is english so hard??? because it's not british... It's a bastardisation of all the laguages which all the flotsam and jetsam of continental europeans immiogrants who got washed up on our shores in the last thousand years and imposed on us unsuspecting brits. The real british, Picts, Brythonwy (spelling), etc have no problems with it. Just the "immigrants" (read english) accepting gutter trash slang like "joof speek" "ambonics" "american" and other such junk as a "proof of individuality" ? WTF????
deliberately provocative...
OK heading for the slit tranch with my tin hat......
Why is english so hard??? because it's not british... It's a bastardisation of all the laguages which all the flotsam and jetsam of continental europeans immiogrants who got washed up on our shores in the last thousand years and imposed on us unsuspecting brits. The real british, Picts, Brythonwy (spelling), etc have no problems with it. Just the "immigrants" (read english) accepting gutter trash slang like "joof speek" "ambonics" "american" and other such junk as a "proof of individuality" ? WTF????
deliberately provocative... OK heading for the slit tranch with my tin hat......
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