Finally, someone understands!
Discussion
Finally, someone understands: (appologies if this has been posted before!)
The other day I was cruising along as usual in my BMW coming onto one of MY motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars.
First off. I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip-way! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway! (the driver of the car behind me realised his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn).
Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get into the BMW lane, (why do underlings use this lane? Surely everyone knows it is for BMW drivers only?)
Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110mp/h enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane on my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 70mp/h. Naturally, I got within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.
Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back behind me! He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I could out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get into the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.
Needless to say, I was eager to oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper to confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast! Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my driver's licence to a Police Station to be sent away to have some points put on,(they're not free either - they're £20 each and I was only allowed three).
But the man at the police station said that because I drive a BMW , it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points, and then I won't even NEED a driving licence, so they will take it off me! See, now THAT'S the sort of respect you get when you buy and drive a BMW .
The other day I was cruising along as usual in my BMW coming onto one of MY motorways, which was very busy with inferior cars.
First off. I couldn't believe that the volume of traffic DIDN'T slow down for me AT ALL as I came off the slip-way! I had to squeeze into a barely big enough gap between two cars in order to get onto my motorway! (the driver of the car behind me realised his mistake though and honked an apology to me with a long blast of his horn).
Unbelievably, I had to do the same again before I could get into the BMW lane, (why do underlings use this lane? Surely everyone knows it is for BMW drivers only?)
Anyway, once I was in the BMW lane and posing along at 110mp/h enjoying the adulation that the inferior car drivers were giving me, I noticed an inferior car ahead of me which was not only in the BMW lane on my motorway, but was driving at a ridiculous 70mp/h. Naturally, I got within a foot or so of his rear bumper and flashed my headlights to remind him he shouldn't be in the BMW lane of my motorway and to get out of my way.
Of course, once he realised it was a BMW behind him, he did just that, but I could hardly believe it when he pulled straight back behind me! He also tried to keep up with me and when he realised I could out-run him, he put on some blue lights in his front grill and urged me to get into the hard shoulder so that he could congratulate me on my excellent car.
Needless to say, I was eager to oblige and when we had stopped, the man gave me a piece of paper to confirming what I already knew - that my car goes fast! Apparently he wants everyone to know what a superior car I have, so I had to take my driver's licence to a Police Station to be sent away to have some points put on,(they're not free either - they're £20 each and I was only allowed three).
But the man at the police station said that because I drive a BMW , it won't be much longer before I earn the full 12 points, and then I won't even NEED a driving licence, so they will take it off me! See, now THAT'S the sort of respect you get when you buy and drive a BMW .
We must be careful now with slagging off beamer drivers on here 
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