How to sell dreams

Author
Discussion

Jon39

Original Poster:

13,375 posts

150 months

Friday 23rd August
quotequote all

Go in to a car showroom these days to request a brochure, and they will probably think you have never heard of the paperless internet.

Aston Martin are now having to persuade their infamous, 'new younger customers', to part with at least a quarter of a million Pounds.
Amateurish old fashioned leaflets and brochures would certainly not be appropriate, and telling prospective customers to go away and look on the internet won't succeed either.

Posh hardback books are now being provided to prospective Aston Martin customers.
The following words on the opening page of the book, have clearly been very carefully considered and should almost be enough to make you instantly want to buy a car, from 'the world's most desirable, ultra-luxury British performance brand'.


ASTON MARTIN the name stamped on your heart.
Two words panting with obsession.
Over 110 years of blood, sweat and romantic dedication stitched into every crevice and flawless line.
Hours, hours and hours of poring and poring.
Countless hands and countless minds, all for one roaring flourish.
Proud on four wheels.
Decorated in style.
Cut to spike adrenaline and raise heart rates before you find yourself flying at otherworldly speeds.
Welcome to Aston Martin.


I expect after that you are about to say, "Yes I'll take it, where do I sign". - smile
Almost poetry.


Edited by Jon39 on Friday 23 August 21:28

Austin_Metro

1,307 posts

55 months

Friday 23rd August
quotequote all
Jon39 said:

Go in to a car showroom these days to request a brochure, and they will probably think you have never heard of the paperless internet.

Aston Martin are now having to persuade their infamous, 'new younger customers', to part with at least a quarter of a million Pounds.
Amateurish old fashioned leaflets and brochures would certainly not be appropriate, and telling prospective customers to go away and look on the internet won't succeed either.

Posh hardback books are now being provided to prospective Aston Martin customers.
The following words on the opening page of the book, have clearly been very carefully considered and should almost be enough to make you instantly want to buy a car, from 'the world's most desirable, ultra-luxury British performance brand'.


ASTON MARTIN the name stamped on your heart.
Two words panting with obsession.
Over 110 years of blood, sweat and romantic dedication stitched into every crevice and flawless line.
Hours, hours and hours of poring and poring.
Countless hands and countless minds, all for one roaring flourish.
Proud on four wheels.
Decorated in style.
Cut to spike adrenaline and raise heart rates before you find yourself flying at otherworldly speeds.
Welcome to Aston Martin.


I expect after that you are about to say, "Yes I'll take it, where do I sign". - smile
Almost poetry.


Edited by Jon39 on Friday 23 August 21:28
I think it’s terrible writing. Laughable.

BlackTails

844 posts

62 months

Friday 23rd August
quotequote all
It reads like a collaboration between an AI and someone who thinks (very wrongly) that they are rather good at writing evocatively. To take but one example: “crevice”. Not a word anyone associates in any positive way with a car. Yet here it is.

What was that awful line from the new Vantage launch? “Forged in the fires of the limit”?

It’s the same author(s). It has their tell-tale laughable nonsense style.

SmithCorona

729 posts

36 months

Friday 23rd August
quotequote all
They haven't mentioned James Bond yet.

kevinon

982 posts

67 months

Friday 23rd August
quotequote all
That is truly terrible.

So bad, I'm struggling to believe this word salad made it into print.

But fun to put into an online paraphraser - some of these sentences are better IMHO, but still ludicrous.


Two words, breathless and fixated.
Almost 110 years of blood, sweat and passionate devotion were infused into each and every nook and cranny and perfect line.
Poring for hours on end without stopping.
A multitude of hands and thoughts united in one thunderous flourish.
a proud four-wheeler.
tastefully decorated.
Cut to heart-rate increases and an adrenaline rush before you start travelling at unearthly speeds.

https://quillbot.com

Jon39

Original Poster:

13,375 posts

150 months

Friday 23rd August
quotequote all

Well, well. You seem uncertain that these new quality hardback books, will help to sell more cars.

I only gave you a flavour of one half of the opening page.
The DBX book has 56 pages. Reading some of the page headings can be - - well, puzzling.
I was particularly taken by the combination of miles and millimetres. Perhaps appealing to both British and French markets.


DBX707 - A PIROUETTING POWER PUNCH

DBX V8 - AN SUV WITH COAT TAILS

THE COMPONENTS OF FLIGHT

DEVOURING MILES BY THE MILLIMETRE

KING OF THE ROAD, HORIZON AND RETINA

THE SUBLIME MEETS THE METICULOUS. [ very good. Was meticulous the first word that came to their mind? smile ]

FINGERPRINTS IN EVERY STITCH

FROM START TO FINISH - Each wheel can spin its own tale of personalisation

A COLLAGE IN THE SHAPE OF AN SUV


Perhaps try to obtain some of these books for yourself, from your dealer.

Who knows, they might become popular at The Hay Festival of Literature & Arts.
I can imagine amongst the Hay events programme,
following
'George Monbiot - The Invisible Doctrine'
and just before
'Liam Byrne talks to Oliver Bullough - Capitalism and Wealth Inequality',
they could have
'Paul Garbett, Aston Martin, Head of Corporate and Brand Communications - Discussion, The New Ultra-Luxury Communication by Words Concept' - smile


Edited by Jon39 on Saturday 24th August 10:24

LooneyTunes

7,584 posts

165 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
Jon39 said:

[x] the name stamped on your heart.
Two words panting with obsession.
Over 110 years of blood, sweat and romantic dedication stitched into every crevice and flawless line.
Hours, hours and hours of poring and poring.
Countless hands and countless minds, all for one roaring flourish.
Please tell me this is a wind up? Did they get an erotic fiction/porn parody writer to do their copy?

I’ve said it before on here, but AML seem to have completely lost their way when it comes to marketing their product. Not just in style, but also in execution.

PlywoodPascal

5,385 posts

28 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
007 wouldn’t stand for this crap, he’d delete it all and replace it with pictures of spitfires and union jacks, that’s what attracted me to Aston martins in the first place.

Calinours

1,328 posts

57 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
Is that for real Jon? Can you photograph the book in question?

It sound like a bad AI translation. I wonder if it was
originally written in an Indian or Chinese language?

AM marketing drivel reminds me of the translations from Japanese on the warning stickers on my motorbikes in the 1980s - my favourite was always "preserve nature, wear a helmet"

Jon39

Original Poster:

13,375 posts

150 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all

Calinours said:
Is that for real Jon? Can you photograph the book in question?




I think the 550 power DBX has recently been discontinued, so therefore this book is now obsolete.


LooneyTunes

7,584 posts

165 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
Jon39 said:

therefore this book is now obsolete.
That's a shame. I feel like Aston Martin stamped on my heart.

Sporky

7,287 posts

71 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
Jon39 said:

panting
obsession
sweat
crevice
poring
Countless hands
Ew.

Agent57

1,848 posts

161 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
" FINGERPRINTS IN EVERY STITCH "

" FROM START TO FINISH - Each wheel can spin its own tale of personalisation "

I don't want fingerprints on my new car.

I like my wheels to look the same. A car with four different wheel styles would blow my mind. The 'Harlequin' wheel option?

Jon39

Original Poster:

13,375 posts

150 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all

LooneyTunes said:
Jon39 said:

therefore this book is now obsolete.
That's a shame. I feel like Aston Martin stamped on my heart.

biglaugh


ram_g

62 posts

12 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
Looks like Aston Martin Works have hit upon a new revenue stream by selling these books on eBay! biggrin

https://www.ebay.com/itm/204655169385?chn=ps&n...

PlywoodPascal

5,385 posts

28 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
Do they do a sales brochure for the sales brochure now that you can the brochure?

williamp

19,562 posts

280 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all
I'm sure we can do better. How about:

There was a car called the DBX
Whose salesman guaranteed me sex
The Wife said No way!
But he said Oh…Okay..
Buying one really make my eyes water...

Jon39

Original Poster:

13,375 posts

150 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all

ram_g said:
Looks like Aston Martin Works have hit upon a new revenue stream by selling these books on eBay! biggrin

https://www.ebay.com/itm/204655169385?chn=ps&n...

Unbelievable that the seller is Aston Martin Works?
That DB12 book is still a current brochure.

The motor retailer tradition has always been to give away brochures as a sales promotion item, then sell the cars.
Have Aston Martin Works now adopted a different business model?
We might all be in luck, if they now sell the brochures and give away the cars. - smile

Having just looked at the advertisement again, I notice there is an accompanying warning.
'Check the item description to confirm this fits your vehicle'
It certainly won't fit in a Vantage glove box, but it will fit in the boot.

AM Works have five DB12 books for sale.
I wonder what offering them for sale really means?
Have they decided that the books are not helping them to sell DB12s?
Do their prospective customers read English, but not Gobbledegook?
Do the good people at AMW think the Gaydon Marketing staff must be snorting something?

The whole thing is a mystery.


Edited by Jon39 on Saturday 24th August 22:39

Dynamic Space Wizard

940 posts

111 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all

Jon39

Original Poster:

13,375 posts

150 months

Saturday 24th August
quotequote all

Very good, Dynamic Space ...


williamp said:
I'm sure we can do better. How about:

There was a car called the DBX
Whose salesman guaranteed me sex
The Wife said No way!
But he said Oh…Okay..
Buying one really make my eyes water...

Especially when I saw the salesman's daughter.


( I assume that each of us adds one line to your poem, williamp )


Edited by Jon39 on Saturday 24th August 22:54