The "driving advisor" in your passenger seat
Discussion
I don't want to rant.
But today, the person in my passenger seat was a f
king pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter.
She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
But today, the person in my passenger seat was a f
king pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter. She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
Pit Pony said:
I don't want to rant.
But today, the person in my passenger seat was a fking pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter.
She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
You have my sympathy. I have exactly the same problem.But today, the person in my passenger seat was a f
king pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter. She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
I tried to explain the other week that sitting for a prolonged period in the blind spot of a car on a motorway was more dangerous than momentarily driving at 75mph to get past it. Apparently not.
I’ve also tried to explain that slamming on the brakes for an amber is more dangerous than driving through.
Like you I drive about 20-25k a year, have done for years. I get reminded of the 2 no fault accidents I’ve had in that time as evidence her advice is needed.
Pit Pony said:
I don't want to rant.
But today, the person in my passenger seat was a fking pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter.
She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
Why were you driving her car? If she doesn’t like your driving let her drive.But today, the person in my passenger seat was a f
king pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter. She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
I'm the world's worst passenger, mostly for no good reason. Thankfully she won't drive with me in the car and I'm content with that.
She is a great passenger though and only comments on my " bad driving" when I comment on it.
Side note, she has been involved in about 10 v2v incidents, roughly 1 every 2 years of driving. I've had one argument with a wall in 30 years of driving.
She is a great passenger though and only comments on my " bad driving" when I comment on it.
Side note, she has been involved in about 10 v2v incidents, roughly 1 every 2 years of driving. I've had one argument with a wall in 30 years of driving.
Yesterday morning we had light fog so I switched my headlights from Auto to dipped to ensure they were being displayed and commented on how many other cars weren't displaying headlights in reduced visibility.
The response I got was "I don't put my headlights on as my cars white so they should be able to see it anyway".
We agreed to disagree
The response I got was "I don't put my headlights on as my cars white so they should be able to see it anyway".
We agreed to disagree
Timely thread as I had a "discussion" with my wife about this very thing for pretty much the entire duration of the M74 yesterday and obviously upon concluding, nobody was in agreement but my wife then pointed out that this subject was in fact, from concluded.
I'm not a good passenger unless it's with a pretty decent driver. My wife is actually a pretty decent driver, flawless driving record and generally doesn't hang about. So on paper, I should be fine with her driving but I'm not - she's got very little mechanical sympathy... she just drives. Potholes, easing it into gear, gentle inputs aren't things that even register for her so I find myself getting a tad harassed quickly... so by default, I drive and she's there to point out the things that I evidently don't do when she's not there.
Basic stuff like stopping at red lights, not crashing into fields, not speeding or seeing that massive orange HGV about 2 miles in front of us travelling in the same direction. However she's brilliant at vague criticism...
"Woah, did you not see that?"
"See what?"
"That, there!"
Could be anything from a low flying pigeon to a decent sized landslide in Tahiti but she's all over it. Yesterday, whilst on the M6... having had a bit of a grumble about three lanes, lorries, people in general and the weather she helpfully started pointing out that we should be in the other lane so why are we not in that lane - well, remember that massive orange HGV that was pointed out miles back, yes well now it's beside us occupying the piece of ground you think we should be in so I'll just wait...
I've found occupying her with other stuff works - map reading is good or getting her to research something like the weather somewhere we're not going. Thankfully I also had two kids who kick off they "When will we be there / I need a wee wee" game about 3mins into any trip so that usually keeps her busy until she falls asleep. Or pretends to sleep. I sometimes do that too just to level the playing field a bit.
I'm not a good passenger unless it's with a pretty decent driver. My wife is actually a pretty decent driver, flawless driving record and generally doesn't hang about. So on paper, I should be fine with her driving but I'm not - she's got very little mechanical sympathy... she just drives. Potholes, easing it into gear, gentle inputs aren't things that even register for her so I find myself getting a tad harassed quickly... so by default, I drive and she's there to point out the things that I evidently don't do when she's not there.
Basic stuff like stopping at red lights, not crashing into fields, not speeding or seeing that massive orange HGV about 2 miles in front of us travelling in the same direction. However she's brilliant at vague criticism...
"Woah, did you not see that?"
"See what?"
"That, there!"
Could be anything from a low flying pigeon to a decent sized landslide in Tahiti but she's all over it. Yesterday, whilst on the M6... having had a bit of a grumble about three lanes, lorries, people in general and the weather she helpfully started pointing out that we should be in the other lane so why are we not in that lane - well, remember that massive orange HGV that was pointed out miles back, yes well now it's beside us occupying the piece of ground you think we should be in so I'll just wait...
I've found occupying her with other stuff works - map reading is good or getting her to research something like the weather somewhere we're not going. Thankfully I also had two kids who kick off they "When will we be there / I need a wee wee" game about 3mins into any trip so that usually keeps her busy until she falls asleep. Or pretends to sleep. I sometimes do that too just to level the playing field a bit.
robemcdonald said:
Pit Pony said:
I don't want to rant.
But today, the person in my passenger seat was a fking pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter.
She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
Why were you driving her car? If she doesn’t like your driving let her drive.But today, the person in my passenger seat was a f
king pain in the arse. I love my wife to bits but she has no filter. She probably drives 4k a year. I drive 20k some of those are in her car.
Today, we drove 110 miles to Birmingham in her car. M57, M62, M6, detour on the M6toll to save 30 mins, A38 (which i used to comute on every day for 2 years, not so long back) and A38M
I have a GPS speed box on the corner of my phone, with Google maps acting as my sat nav so we can ignore the cars speedo which read 3 mph faster than actual at 70 mph.
Because its her car. I never go over the speed limit in her car. Ever. (If I can help it) I use cruise control and set it at the speed limit. Occassionally the GPS might say 71, for a few seconds and then sit back at 70 for a few mins. This is too much for her. I'm speeding apparently. Once I accelerated from traffic lights to the speed limit 40 mph, but overcooked it and for a few seconds we were doing 43 mph. Now I know where all the fixed camera s are located on all these roads, but I'm not complacent. I know that occassionally there could be a camera van lurking. I also know that 43 isn't going to get a NIP.
Twice I went through lights on yellow and I'm screamed at for this. Yes i could have stopped, if I'd braked hard. But I don't see that as safe or reasonable. Apparently I'm going to lose my licence.
Its a shame that the cars behind managed to stop, to back up.my argumentthat the car behind was too close.
, as this is Birmingham where cars usually ignore the red light for about 10 seconds.
Anyway, just want to know if anyone else's partner has this massive illogical fear that they are going to lose their licence.
And this has nothing to do with her view of road safety, she's very accepting that my driving is safe.
Actually to me it feels less safe, as I'm constantly looking at my speed, and on the motorway it's a pain in the arse. 75 is safer in my humble opinion.
If there were no speed limit, she'd happily "allow me" to drive at 100 mph.
My "driving advisor" is generally fairly good and usually keeps away from telling what to do or how to do it. We spent many years charging around Europe on various large-capacity motorcycles and she was the Best Pillion Passenger in the World and only occasionally gave me a poke in the ribs and seems to trust me implicitly.
But...now that the bike has been replaced with an MX-5, she gets terribly religious sometimes. Usually on entry to a corner, the words from the passenger seat start with "Jesus", "Oh Jesus!", "JESUS CHRIST!!".
The fact that we are perhaps just following an SUV-thing at the same speed around a corner doesn't seem to register. It gets even worse if I'm actually giving it the beans, and the profanities grow in intensity and volume. It must be down to being close to the ground, I think.
But...now that the bike has been replaced with an MX-5, she gets terribly religious sometimes. Usually on entry to a corner, the words from the passenger seat start with "Jesus", "Oh Jesus!", "JESUS CHRIST!!".
The fact that we are perhaps just following an SUV-thing at the same speed around a corner doesn't seem to register. It gets even worse if I'm actually giving it the beans, and the profanities grow in intensity and volume. It must be down to being close to the ground, I think.
A mate had this problem with his dad complaining about his new Audi estate having uncomfortable seats and the ride being a bit harsh and there's far too much tyre noise, too much engine noise etc etc...
After several miles of his dads constant moaning about the car they turned off a roundabout onto a motorway slip road so said mate quietly slipped the gearbox into 'sport' mode and stamped on the throttle like it was a fat ginger step-child. The twin turbo V10 did what twin turbo V10s do when given full throttle and hit .5 beyond warp speed.
His dad screamed for the full length of the slip road before shutting the fk up for the rest of their journey 
After several miles of his dads constant moaning about the car they turned off a roundabout onto a motorway slip road so said mate quietly slipped the gearbox into 'sport' mode and stamped on the throttle like it was a fat ginger step-child. The twin turbo V10 did what twin turbo V10s do when given full throttle and hit .5 beyond warp speed.
His dad screamed for the full length of the slip road before shutting the f
k up for the rest of their journey As a driving instructor myself, I am a sht passenger unless I'm in my tuition car and don't they know it. When my wife kicked me out of the car once, I did realise I needed to rein it in a bit.
Therefore, unless I'm too tired or not insured etc, I drive. Everyone that drives my car (friends and family, not just pupils) knows that I will dual them if I have to, regardless of whether or not they've passed their test.
My wife is a great driver. The only ever incident she had was when her and another car got too close to each other and hit side mirrors (both their fault, I was in her van behind and saw it). But she does approach junctions a tad quick so I'm often quite quick to chime in with the "slow down, 4 wheels round here" type comments. I did also have to dual control her once, the day I got my brand new car.. but when I drive, she's as good as gold and doesn't say anything.
So really, on the flip side, I am the driving advisor in her passenger seat!
t passenger unless I'm in my tuition car and don't they know it. When my wife kicked me out of the car once, I did realise I needed to rein it in a bit.Therefore, unless I'm too tired or not insured etc, I drive. Everyone that drives my car (friends and family, not just pupils) knows that I will dual them if I have to, regardless of whether or not they've passed their test.
My wife is a great driver. The only ever incident she had was when her and another car got too close to each other and hit side mirrors (both their fault, I was in her van behind and saw it). But she does approach junctions a tad quick so I'm often quite quick to chime in with the "slow down, 4 wheels round here" type comments. I did also have to dual control her once, the day I got my brand new car.. but when I drive, she's as good as gold and doesn't say anything.
So really, on the flip side, I am the driving advisor in her passenger seat!
Edited by Powerfully Built Company Directors Secretary on Saturday 19th October 20:44
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