Top Numpty !

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woof

Original Poster:

8,456 posts

284 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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Since we all enjoy this type of thing I'll share what happen to me on the M4 last week.

Driving in a pretty clear stretch at somewhere around the speed limit, and came across a Rover something in the fast lane about 400m in front on me. Nothing in the middle lane. I already had my main beams on (150W - pretty visible) gave him a quick flash of full beam. Then I a grew closer 200m another double flash. Then got to about 30m and pulled over to the right so he could see me in his side mirrors!

He slammed on his brakes and switched on his hazards and slowed to 50mph. Still nothing in the middle lane, I moved over, gave him the thumbs up and left him dominating the fast lane at 50mph - prick !

plotloss

67,280 posts

277 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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Sounds like more justfication for bonnet mounted mini guns to me...

Matt.

mondeoman

11,430 posts

273 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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Time to get the out methinks!! Get a second hand cheiftain - they're supposed to be good for 70 mph....... hehehehehehe

s2ooz

3,005 posts

291 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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2 choices, dont even bother, just go straight past, a feature I have learned from biking. you wont change him, but when he tells his pals about the "idiot" the undertook him, hopefully he will realise why, or his pals tell him....

2nd) get a blue flashing light for the dash, works great. available from all good car mod shops.

VTECDave

2,005 posts

288 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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Yip I coming against this more and more. Last one was a MGF on the M8 towards Edinburgh.

I usually give them a set time to react and if they don't move I just fly by on the left at the 1st chance assuming it is safe.(ie: if there were cars to the left I'd have no justification for my move).

The MGF moved left after I'd went by.

PetrolTed

34,443 posts

310 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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I'm encountering this more frequently on a mile long stretch of dual carriageway near me. People are sitting in lane 2 at 50mph and despite me bearing down on them faster with a flash of the lights from a reasonable distance, and then some more as I close in, they don't move over.

What annoys me most though is the fact that I don't understand why they're doing it!!! I see people on motorways suddenly pull into the middle lane for no reason - do they think 60mph = lane 2, 70 = lane 3 or something? Has anyone got a numpty in the family that could explain this?

plotloss

67,280 posts

277 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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quote:

I'm encountering this more frequently on a mile long stretch of dual carriageway near me. People are sitting in lane 2 at 50mph and despite me bearing down on them faster with a flash of the lights from a reasonable distance, and then some more as I close in, they don't move over.

What annoys me most though is the fact that I don't understand why they're doing it!!! I see people on motorways suddenly pull into the middle lane for no reason - do they think 60mph = lane 2, 70 = lane 3 or something? Has anyone got a numpty in the family that could explain this?



When I was doing the RoSPA thing the instructor told me a story where they came across a fella on patrol just sat in the middle lane doing 50. They followed him for about two miles and he didnt move so they pulled him. The copper asked 'Why were you in the middle lane when you are not overtaking anything?' and the fella responded - 'But its a 1.6!!' so I am sure there could be any reason!

I do agree though, these people who have nothing in front of the for miles and move over (overtaking a truckload of No tomatoes perhaps?) have been puzzling me for ages!

Matt.

MattC

266 posts

282 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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Blimey! I think parliament should be recalled if the situation has got this bad - even the usually affable Ted is getting irritated by this behaviour...

anonymous-user

61 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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i think its the slow lane/fast lane mentality.
until people realise that there is no slow lane and thats where you are meant to be then this problem will never go away.
i was going to castle combe on the motorway yesterday and came accross an old couple about 70 doing 55mph in their micra, you could not fit a credit card between the old man driving and the windscreen, the same for his passenger next to him. so as we drew along side me and my girlfriend pushed our seats forwards and I hunched myself over the wheel and we went by about 1mph quicker than him. i was having to control myself because i was laughing so hard!

>> Edited by anonymous-user on Tuesday 2nd April 17:14

yertis

18,663 posts

273 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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A Non-numpty reason for sticking in Lane 2 is the often appalling surface condition of Lane 1 - my car tramlines like crazy where the trucks have really done their work and put ruts into the highway . It's no excuse I know but on one or two recent occasions (M5 and A303) I've moved out into Lane 2 just to stop the car hunting all over the place.

But I'm not sat there at 50mph...

dan

1,068 posts

291 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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It has to be said I've often thought that a few well worded signs placed along the hard shoulder would do far more for road safety than speed cameras.

You know... saying something like "KEEP LEFT UNLESS OVERTAKING" or "CHECK YOUR MIRRORS BEFORE CHANGING LANE" and maybe on the back it could say "YOU'RE GOING THE WRONG WAY YOU CLUELESS GERIATRIC OLD GIT!!!"

Instant improvement in road safety and trafic flow, and it would cost a fortune... equally it wouldn't make a fortune either, so it'll naver happen.

Cheers Dan

PetrolTed

34,443 posts

310 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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The motorways are full of 'DON'T DRIVE TIRED' messages at the moment. Can they not also say 'KEEP LEFT' or 'KEEP OFF THE ROADS'?

DavidP

371 posts

279 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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There are definitely people out their who think that the diferent lanes are for doing diferent speeds in. This isn't helped by wrongly naming them "slow, middle and fast"!

These people are, however, IMHO in the minority. I think that the basic problem is people's lack of confidence (quite rightly in most cases!!)in their ability to move into a lane of traffic on their right when they need to. Their only answer is to pick a lane and stick to it.


Bonce

4,339 posts

286 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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quote:

Has anyone got a numpty in the family that could explain this?



My Dad's a Numpty, I'll ask him.

CarZee

13,382 posts

274 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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quote:
It has to be said I've often thought that a few well worded signs placed along the hard shoulder would do far more for road safety than speed cameras.

You know... saying something like "KEEP LEFT UNLESS OVERTAKING"
They have these signs for about 3 miles heading northbound at the bottom of the M1 - god knows why they don't have them every couple of miles on all motorways..

numlock

24 posts

275 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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150W Headlights!! Don't know who is the worst menace on the road, you or the numpty!

I was followed on the M25 a month back by some tw*t in a 405 with monster wattage headlights and foglights on (that were just as bright) and it definately wasn't full beam. Even with the rear view mirror on dipped the lights were as bright as normal headlights. This was a huge distraction, not to mention bloody painfull on the eyes. What it would be like to meet them coming the other way on a dark country lane I dread to think.

So much as I agree with your dislike of numpties I have to say that: You sir are a prize pillock and I hope more people hold you up in future for being such an inconsiderate git! No offence.

Bob the Planner

4,695 posts

276 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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quote:

I think that the basic problem is people's lack of confidence (quite rightly in most cases!!)in their ability to move into a lane of traffic on their right when they need to. Their only answer is to pick a lane and stick to it.






As with most things overtaking ie 'moving into a lane of traffic on their right' only gets better with practice. No practice - no improvement. If you don't make the mitakes - and probably get flashed/hooted a few times, you won't improve either.

Bob

PS is there a Flash smilie ?

superflid

2,254 posts

272 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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I think I said this before but anyway, all that looking in mirrors,indicating and changing lanes would disturb the mobile phone calls. Also, could you not blow your horn as you go past, it could wake someone up!

Terminator

2,421 posts

291 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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quote:

The motorways are full of 'DON'T DRIVE TIRED' messages at the moment. Can they not also say 'KEEP LEFT' or 'KEEP OFF THE ROADS'?


Perhaps if they did them in braille as well, some would take more notice of them...

L112JOM

79 posts

291 months

Tuesday 2nd April 2002
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At the weekend on the M25 I was in the Griff in the fast lane in pretty heavy traffic doing 80ish between 5 and 7 clockwise. A Fiesta Zetec with two numbskulls suddenly appears right up my arse with a Saab then trying to undertake us both in the middle lane ..... I suspect the Saab had had Zetec man performing a simliar manoevre previously and thus pissed him off and he was attempting to prove a point.

The Fiesta was so close I could only see his windscreen - no bonnet...you know what I mean

However this put me in a slightly difficult position. So put in some gas and Zetec man continues up my arse so I pull over when safe and him and his mate have a great laugh at overtaking a tiv....mind you they won't be smiling in their coffins if they keep up that driving

Anyway I then pull back out into the fast lane to overtake others and the Saab reappears flashing me to pull over - traffic heavy and my speed in the fast lane appropriate with appropriate distance from the car in front.

What was my response?

I'm interseted to know how you guys would respond?

Any offers...?