Counselling/Psychotherapy........whats it all about ?
Discussion
How do you know if a counsellor or psycotherapist is good ?? Lots of them show qualifications but how do you know whats valid/recognised as a respected qualification ?
Some say 30 quid an hour some say 50-60 ? Some seem to suggest a 8/12 week programme but are you then tied to that ?
Should you go private or through your GP ?
Anybody had any experiences in using these services ?
Some say 30 quid an hour some say 50-60 ? Some seem to suggest a 8/12 week programme but are you then tied to that ?
Should you go private or through your GP ?
Anybody had any experiences in using these services ?
The governing body is the BACP (British Association of Counselling & Psychotherapy)...
http://www.bacp.co.uk/
Look for someone that has completed full training on a BACP accredited course, (to degree level), and who is a member of the BACP.
However, there is no legal requirement for them to have done this. ANYONE can print up some business cards and start practicing as a counsellor tomorrow morning without any training whatsoever. Scary thought...
http://www.bacp.co.uk/
Look for someone that has completed full training on a BACP accredited course, (to degree level), and who is a member of the BACP.
However, there is no legal requirement for them to have done this. ANYONE can print up some business cards and start practicing as a counsellor tomorrow morning without any training whatsoever. Scary thought...
Personally i think the only advantage to be had by going private is to avoid a long waiting list. NHS psychotherapists are as good as any (often private therapists work for the NHS anyway and just do a bit of private work to get extra income). There's different types of psychotherapy for different problems, your GP will be able to give advice as to the most suitable type for a specific problem.
In all honesty, I'd say you'd have to see them first. If you and them 'click', as in, form a relationship (which is what counselling is for, essentially) then thats a good counsellor.
If you feel like you're being told your feelings, and they wash over your head, then change.
By this, I don't mean if you DENY these feelings. If the counsellor says something and deep down you agree, then thats a good counsellor infront of you. If none of it makes sense, consider changing.
Counseling (Psychotherapy is just the medical word for it) is essentially having a very wise friend. Your friends may identify or offer some advice with it, but counsellors go deeper in finding out issues, and start to help you solve them.
If you feel like you're being told your feelings, and they wash over your head, then change.
By this, I don't mean if you DENY these feelings. If the counsellor says something and deep down you agree, then thats a good counsellor infront of you. If none of it makes sense, consider changing.
Counseling (Psychotherapy is just the medical word for it) is essentially having a very wise friend. Your friends may identify or offer some advice with it, but counsellors go deeper in finding out issues, and start to help you solve them.
F93 said:
In all honesty, I'd say you'd have to see them first. If you and them 'click', as in, form a relationship (which is what counselling is for, essentially) then thats a good counsellor.
If you feel like you're being told your feelings, and they wash over your head, then change.
By this, I don't mean if you DENY these feelings. If the counsellor says something and deep down you agree, then thats a good counsellor infront of you. If none of it makes sense, consider changing.
Counseling (Psychotherapy is just the medical word for it) is essentially having a very wise friend. Your friends may identify or offer some advice with it, but counsellors go deeper in finding out issues, and start to help you solve them.
As above. I err, know someone who's seen 3 or 4 supposedly clever councellors. One of them really made sense, and invited err, this someone to look at life from a slightly different angle, to understand that they've grown up to be the sort of person they are because of numerous influences, that their parents behave the way they do because of lots of different reasons etc etc. Far too much to go into here, but the right councellor can really help. I'm told. The wrong councellor is a waste of time. I'm told.If you feel like you're being told your feelings, and they wash over your head, then change.
By this, I don't mean if you DENY these feelings. If the counsellor says something and deep down you agree, then thats a good counsellor infront of you. If none of it makes sense, consider changing.
Counseling (Psychotherapy is just the medical word for it) is essentially having a very wise friend. Your friends may identify or offer some advice with it, but counsellors go deeper in finding out issues, and start to help you solve them.
And of course, it can take you months before all problems are let out, and longer before you actually start to solve them.
For good reason.
Deep problems might not even seem like problems, until you say 'I felt like this today' and the counsellor says 'thats bad'...
It's difficult to describe without making it seem like the counsellor would go call the NHS Mental Health Department, but its all good... :S
For good reason.
Deep problems might not even seem like problems, until you say 'I felt like this today' and the counsellor says 'thats bad'...
It's difficult to describe without making it seem like the counsellor would go call the NHS Mental Health Department, but its all good... :S
SimonV8ster said:
Thanks F93.
I'm just worried that somebody might tell me something that isn't true - make me think about things even more and things that aren't even wrong in the first place !!
As you say I guess its important that you 'click' with them and trust them early on.
Yeah, my experience with them (have had 2 in past year) has been positive. But, they don't always get things right. The one I have now has basically been really good. But if they do say something and you know it isn't right, tell them! They often will get to the right one eventually, and it helps them get to the right one in the future. I'm just worried that somebody might tell me something that isn't true - make me think about things even more and things that aren't even wrong in the first place !!
As you say I guess its important that you 'click' with them and trust them early on.
But of course, a big thing to say is, counseling gets worse before it gets better, you bring all the problems up and feel awful for a few weeks, but once you start solving them, you feel 10x times better than you did before you started.
There are different approaches. As has already been mentioned generic 'talk therapy' can be a protracted affair and it can take some people months to get to the root causes and triggers of their issues.
You really need to be able to click with the person you are seeing. There has to be a sense of bonding/rapport (though not dependency) otherwise it can take longer.
Most sessions are 45 minutes to one hour and that can be really tough if you are in the middle of something and time is up. Private or GP that's up to you and try to find someone through word of mouth or recommendation if you can.
Cost varies enormously. Some will charge £30 ph some £200 per hour are much more besides. As with everything it depends on reputation and skill. Not everyone sees clients for just one hour though, some will see clients for a few hours at a time, some all day and a few (a very few actually) are prepared to see clients for blocks of consecutive days.
You really need to be able to click with the person you are seeing. There has to be a sense of bonding/rapport (though not dependency) otherwise it can take longer.
Most sessions are 45 minutes to one hour and that can be really tough if you are in the middle of something and time is up. Private or GP that's up to you and try to find someone through word of mouth or recommendation if you can.
Cost varies enormously. Some will charge £30 ph some £200 per hour are much more besides. As with everything it depends on reputation and skill. Not everyone sees clients for just one hour though, some will see clients for a few hours at a time, some all day and a few (a very few actually) are prepared to see clients for blocks of consecutive days.
Thanks for the info drivin_me_nuts, read it yesterday but only just read your profile. You seem to know more about this than you're letting on 
I may pursue this a little further and see how I go.
I fail to see how it can take 'months' to sort things out ? Surely a qualified person will be able identify the problem and address it fairly quickly ? Or are they just waiting for the person to tell them what it is ?
I know I'm sounding sceptical and I suppose most people do before they embark on anything like this, time will tell - as always !!
I may pursue this a little further and see how I go.
I fail to see how it can take 'months' to sort things out ? Surely a qualified person will be able identify the problem and address it fairly quickly ? Or are they just waiting for the person to tell them what it is ?
I know I'm sounding sceptical and I suppose most people do before they embark on anything like this, time will tell - as always !!
Go for it with an open mind, listen to what they have to say and go through a session or two. Pretty soon you will find that it will be clear if the person is helping or not.
As with all things, there are good ones, great ones and bad ones. Trust your instincts and you will get a sense if you click with them or if they are talking cobblers and / or simply don't gel with you.
It's good to talk to someone who is not family or friend sometimes.
Especially if you are a nutter.
( joking about the last bit )
As with all things, there are good ones, great ones and bad ones. Trust your instincts and you will get a sense if you click with them or if they are talking cobblers and / or simply don't gel with you.
It's good to talk to someone who is not family or friend sometimes.
Especially if you are a nutter.
( joking about the last bit
)SimonV8ster said:
Thanks for the info drivin_me_nuts, read it yesterday but only just read your profile. You seem to know more about this than you're letting on
I may pursue this a little further and see how I go.
I fail to see how it can take 'months' to sort things out ? Surely a qualified person will be able identify the problem and address it fairly quickly ? Or are they just waiting for the person to tell them what it is ?
I know I'm sounding sceptical and I suppose most people do before they embark on anything like this, time will tell - as always !!
I work with clients on a whole raft of issues and I am one of those few who sees clients for extended periods - all day over blocks of days. I may pursue this a little further and see how I go.
I fail to see how it can take 'months' to sort things out ? Surely a qualified person will be able identify the problem and address it fairly quickly ? Or are they just waiting for the person to tell them what it is ?
I know I'm sounding sceptical and I suppose most people do before they embark on anything like this, time will tell - as always !!
In answer to your question some issues are very complex and what can present as something 'simple' often is not at all and you can end up tackling a number of what could be perceived to be different issues simultaneously. Knowing what the issue is is often only part of the story - it's what to do with 'it' that can takes the skill and the unravelling and resolving.
Different people offer vert different services. For example I am not a consellor, nor do I use CBT. I made a decision long ago that is absolutely not the route for me and my business as IMO it's far too constraining and prescriptive. I am not quite sure what the term is so i'll go with 'shop around' until you find someone who you feel you can work with. That's the main thing - that you feel you have trust and most importantly, that you get results.
I'm seeing an NHS counsellor...it seems there's only one in the whole of Bedfordshire that can deal with bereavement issues. I have so many 'paranormal' issues it's difficult to deal with on a how to keep your home intact type basis.
It was about 9 months before my first appoinment, and I was angry because it took so long when I was having so much poltergeist activity . That anger is supposed to have made it worse....so then I might be sectioned ( brilliant
)
I've posted before about lack of bereavement care ( as a topic)...and I'm sure some bright spark might repost the thread link...they expect so many partners to die within a few months ,that they're just left to die.
As in the question of the original poster, :lol: no it doesn't help at all - best to try and sort it out for yourself
It was about 9 months before my first appoinment, and I was angry because it took so long when I was having so much poltergeist activity . That anger is supposed to have made it worse....so then I might be sectioned ( brilliant
) I've posted before about lack of bereavement care ( as a topic)...and I'm sure some bright spark might repost the thread link...they expect so many partners to die within a few months ,that they're just left to die.
As in the question of the original poster, :lol: no it doesn't help at all - best to try and sort it out for yourself
I have seen a number of counsellors over the years and all have been private because it was so easy and you can pick times which suit you. You can also see if you click with the counsellor at a first meeting which I don't think you can do with the NHS so a long wait for the wrong person to come along could be the result.
Counselling can be a very good thing as it can give you a whole different view of you and how you act/react etc to stuff but you do need to find someone with whom you can work. I would say the first man I saw was bloody useless but I stuck at it for a long time. Eventually, I moved and that was my excuse to get out. For a very short time I saw a counsellor who used hypnotherapy but he was a bit of a nutter so I stopped. I then found a consellor locally who I saw for a while and she was quite good at times but still not right so I quite.
The last two I saw were both local and both excellent and I really felt that progress was being made with both. However, the first one's mother died suddenly and she found it too painful to carry on; the second decided to move west to look after her ageing father, which was great shame. All along the issue has been the same and its all confidence and self belief related - not earth shattering but hard to live with, especially as I get older and the chances of my changing seem less. Ultimately, its down to me to change though and this is what I have learned; the counsellor can only help and you have to make the final decision.
Depending on the nature of your problems, different techniques can be used. CBT is very popular at the moment and can be very quick. It doesn't work for me as the first time someone tells me to write a list is when I say no. CBT can fix things in weeks but won't work for everyone. For me, an open ended arrangement works best as I find it very helpful to talk to someone about things on a regular, weekly, basis but with reviews built in every few months to measure progress.
I did see one NHS counsellor at the Maudesely (sp?) in south London. I went once. The place was full of nutters and to be honest itwas hard to tell who were staff and who were patients. When said counsellor started asking me daft questions such as "who is the queen - wait a minute - does the country have a queen or a president" in all seriousness, I thought that this was definitely not for me.
Sorry to go on but I would advise looking at the BACP site, emailing a few people based on their descriptions of how they work, and go and see a few. A good one will be worth the money.
Counselling can be a very good thing as it can give you a whole different view of you and how you act/react etc to stuff but you do need to find someone with whom you can work. I would say the first man I saw was bloody useless but I stuck at it for a long time. Eventually, I moved and that was my excuse to get out. For a very short time I saw a counsellor who used hypnotherapy but he was a bit of a nutter so I stopped. I then found a consellor locally who I saw for a while and she was quite good at times but still not right so I quite.
The last two I saw were both local and both excellent and I really felt that progress was being made with both. However, the first one's mother died suddenly and she found it too painful to carry on; the second decided to move west to look after her ageing father, which was great shame. All along the issue has been the same and its all confidence and self belief related - not earth shattering but hard to live with, especially as I get older and the chances of my changing seem less. Ultimately, its down to me to change though and this is what I have learned; the counsellor can only help and you have to make the final decision.
Depending on the nature of your problems, different techniques can be used. CBT is very popular at the moment and can be very quick. It doesn't work for me as the first time someone tells me to write a list is when I say no. CBT can fix things in weeks but won't work for everyone. For me, an open ended arrangement works best as I find it very helpful to talk to someone about things on a regular, weekly, basis but with reviews built in every few months to measure progress.
I did see one NHS counsellor at the Maudesely (sp?) in south London. I went once. The place was full of nutters and to be honest itwas hard to tell who were staff and who were patients. When said counsellor started asking me daft questions such as "who is the queen - wait a minute - does the country have a queen or a president" in all seriousness, I thought that this was definitely not for me.
Sorry to go on but I would advise looking at the BACP site, emailing a few people based on their descriptions of how they work, and go and see a few. A good one will be worth the money.
Edited by rlw on Sunday 29th November 12:48
SimonV8ster said:
Thanks for all the useful info 
I'm going to give it a go and see a couple of people to see how/if I get on.
The waiting list on the NHS seems to be about 4 months in my area so sod that !
4 months? that soon?I'm going to give it a go and see a couple of people to see how/if I get on.
The waiting list on the NHS seems to be about 4 months in my area so sod that !
...and you're saying sod that :lol:
eta
what is CBT? am I missing out?
Edited by condor on Monday 30th November 01:17
Cognitive Behavioural Therapy
Lots of informtation readily available, google is your friend. Can be highly effective for some peoples and specific conditions. The last papers I read suggested a success rate of about 50% - 60%. As with everything, there are some very strong advocates heaping great praise upon it and some who damn it as a cheap fix approach...
As the olde saying goes;
You pays your money ...
Lots of informtation readily available, google is your friend. Can be highly effective for some peoples and specific conditions. The last papers I read suggested a success rate of about 50% - 60%. As with everything, there are some very strong advocates heaping great praise upon it and some who damn it as a cheap fix approach...
As the olde saying goes;
You pays your money ...
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