Home Schooling

[Bullybutt]

Quick intro.... 13 year old daughter. High functioning autism and severe anxiety. Had lots of different counselling through the years. Currently on the EBSA pathway for the last six months and isn't really engaging with it. So the upshot is that she will end up being asked to leave by the Christmas holiday and it's down to me home schooling after that.
Had anyone successfully done this and had a good outcome with exams etc? Has it driven you mad? I don't know where to start...

[scotlandtim]

Hi.

we have 3 boys, all who have been failed by the School system one way or another.

Our eldest (13) ASD / ADHD was having an awful time.

We now homeschool all 3. Not because we are hippy homeschoolers, but because we recognise it's the best thing for them.

Regarding exams / curriculums etc - its a minefied, but its possible. Effectively a full time job (for my wife)

Happy to chat / answer questions.
It's not easy, and there's no break - but it's possible. We don't use the ipad babysitter / screens during the day as a choice, many do, but doesn't work for us

Here's a link to my wifes blog - shes the wise one and it's very informative:

https://thereisnoshouldbe.com/

[Pistom]

Wow - this is a massive area that could run into a lot of discussion.

Done right and with good support, your child could end up with massive advantages in life that those stuck in traditional schooling will never have but it takes huge dedication from parents. Most really are not up to it and I've seen marriages fall apart because of the stresses caused.

The key benefit is that your child doesn't have to follow traditional schooling methods - nor will they have to be dragged down by the most incapable in the school.

The children I've seen home schooled were mostly written off as never going to amount to anything. All have gone onto careers they could never of dreamt of had they been left rotting in the traditional schooling system many kids are exposed to.

The personal price parents pay though is often high.

Edited by Pistom on Thursday 21st November 10:35

[Bullybutt]

Thankyou both. The husband works away lots and so it will all be down to me to find a way through this. I'm already highly stressed as I'm stuck home mostly 24/7 with her as she hates leaving the house. She isn't engaged with school work in any environment and the chances of me getting her to manage any are pretty slim. The personal cost to me is already large as I have no one to lean on and no one to help navigate me through how I go about all of this and how on earth i try and educate her so she isn't a complete dunderhead in the future. Everything I read is about needing maths and English GCSE's. I've had tutors before and she just won't engage with them.
It feels such a pivotal time and I'm struggling to find a path. Usually I'm straight in with a plan and a way forward. Floundering isn't my forte.

Excellent blog btw, your missus is a powerhouse!

[Pistom]

Yes - that blog is very enlightening and you need to try to find people to interact with like that.

Your husband has a part to play too even if absent. His income makes it possible for you to give your daughter the support she needs. It will probably be hard for him at home as he might feel excluded but it's important he realises his part too.

I'm really no expert. I've just observed the successes parents have achieved and I'm only saying that so you see that you have the opportunity not just to support your daughter to give her the education she needs but actually give her advantages average school kids will never get.

Your key role is to show her the world and explain it to her so she can start to understand for herself what she wants to engage in and where she has strengths.

[scotlandtim]

Bullybutt said:

Thankyou both. The husband works away lots and so it will all be down to me to find a way through this. I'm already highly stressed as I'm stuck home mostly 24/7 with her as she hates leaving the house. She isn't engaged with school work in any environment and the chances of me getting her to manage any are pretty slim. The personal cost to me is already large as I have no one to lean on and no one to help navigate me through how I go about all of this and how on earth i try and educate her so she isn't a complete dunderhead in the future. Everything I read is about needing maths and English GCSE's. I've had tutors before and she just won't engage with them.
It feels such a pivotal time and I'm struggling to find a path. Usually I'm straight in with a plan and a way forward. Floundering isn't my forte.

Excellent blog btw, your missus is a powerhouse!

Thanks for the message re blog - ill pass onto her.

There's a lot to talk about - if you want to have a chat with my wife, im sure she'd be happy to - pm me and ill give you her number.

Do a bit of research into iGCE's. (International General Cert Education) These can be attained through credits, not exams - effectively the Americal system. With enough credits university entrance is achievable. Onus lies on the parents to keep accurate records etc of what the child has done in case of audit. This is how every international student gains entry to UK university.

There are also exam centres where you can pay for the child to sit a UK exam, if you teach a specific curriculum then you can sit the exma if this is how you choose to go

As others have said it's not easy, but if youre "stuck at home" with her anyway - then its never too late to turn it around and invest in her future. She might not thank you now, believe me we have plenty of opposition at home from the boys, but a calm, patient approach is slowly turning things around and the kids are learning

We have external tutoring for English Lit and Science - partly because its beyond us, but also because its important for the boys to sit down and listen to a teacher sometimes. They come to us.

There are loads of homeschool groups on facebook etc - proceed with caution. many use the "excuse" child led learning - basically meaning they don't do anything unless the child wants to - this, in my opinion, isn't teachingand breeds selfish, lazy kids, but each to their own.

As someone once said to us - the ONLY person who is going to advocate for YOUR child is YOU. Ignore what society says, ignore the pressure the school put you under re attendance, only YOU as parent knows what best and right for your child. Its a tough world out there for kids these days - protect them as best, and as long as you can.

Good luck, happy to chat.

[Jasandjules]

There are loads of people who home educate. Facebook will have groups you can join for local people too so they can still meet up and play with other kids too now and again. It is a large community.