Mentally resetting
Discussion
Late 30s, I feel like I've been fatigued and in a state of low level depression since my early 20s, so over 15 years now.
I just get no enjoyment from life and never look forward to anything, in fact I tend to see the negative in everything and life just feels like one long chore.
I don't enjoy my job but it's quite niche so doesn't offer a lot of transferbale skills, therefore, moving jobs would likely result in dropping down to minimum wage and starting again.
I went to the GP about 10 years and had bloodwork done which they said was all 'normal'.
Went back around 5 years ago and was essentially dismissed.
Got prescribed sertraline a couple of years ago but never took them for various reasons (mainly potential side-effects).
The thing is, I do all the right things and don't really have any reason to feel this way. I have a great wife, dog, house in a nice town, no kids (don't want them), I sleep well, exercise regularly (running + free weights), eat fairly well. BMI around 21. Hardly drink alcohol and don't smoke.
I have no issues etc. that I would need to talk to a therapist about. I don't have any friends outside of work but I'm a classic introvert so this has never been an issue.
I've done a bit of mindfulness/meditation over the last year and think it's helped a little bit, could throw myself more into it.
I'm considering getting some private bloodwork done just to double-check for myself and see if I have any deficiencies.
So, has anyone else had similar and/or managed to mentally reset themself? Anyone found ways to start getting more joy out of life?
I just get no enjoyment from life and never look forward to anything, in fact I tend to see the negative in everything and life just feels like one long chore.
I don't enjoy my job but it's quite niche so doesn't offer a lot of transferbale skills, therefore, moving jobs would likely result in dropping down to minimum wage and starting again.
I went to the GP about 10 years and had bloodwork done which they said was all 'normal'.
Went back around 5 years ago and was essentially dismissed.
Got prescribed sertraline a couple of years ago but never took them for various reasons (mainly potential side-effects).
The thing is, I do all the right things and don't really have any reason to feel this way. I have a great wife, dog, house in a nice town, no kids (don't want them), I sleep well, exercise regularly (running + free weights), eat fairly well. BMI around 21. Hardly drink alcohol and don't smoke.
I have no issues etc. that I would need to talk to a therapist about. I don't have any friends outside of work but I'm a classic introvert so this has never been an issue.
I've done a bit of mindfulness/meditation over the last year and think it's helped a little bit, could throw myself more into it.
I'm considering getting some private bloodwork done just to double-check for myself and see if I have any deficiencies.
So, has anyone else had similar and/or managed to mentally reset themself? Anyone found ways to start getting more joy out of life?
Well done for reaching out.
I'm 51 and have been going gradually downhill for a long time, don't especially want to end it, however not sure I'd make much effort to jump out of the way either!
Like you, very little enjoyment from anything, not even sure what enjoyment is.
Yes I would talk to your GP and try and get to the bottom of it, I can't be arsed and you don't want to get to my position of not being bothered!!
If you solve it, please pass it on, take care and listen to the advice of others on here, you're young and don't waste the next 20 years feeling s
tty!!
I'm 51 and have been going gradually downhill for a long time, don't especially want to end it, however not sure I'd make much effort to jump out of the way either!
Like you, very little enjoyment from anything, not even sure what enjoyment is.
Yes I would talk to your GP and try and get to the bottom of it, I can't be arsed and you don't want to get to my position of not being bothered!!
If you solve it, please pass it on, take care and listen to the advice of others on here, you're young and don't waste the next 20 years feeling s
tty!!You don’t enjoy your job, and say you have no friends out of work. That’s two massive components right there. I’m an introvert too, but everyone needs friends, even if you don’t see them often.
No real mention of any interests/hobbies in there either- what interests/excites you?
Having a house, job and wife is nice, but that isn’t a life in itself.
Don’t mean for this to come across as a bit pointed.
No real mention of any interests/hobbies in there either- what interests/excites you?
Having a house, job and wife is nice, but that isn’t a life in itself.
Don’t mean for this to come across as a bit pointed.
I notice you were prescribed Sertraline.
Last October I broke down in front of a Doctor that I had never met before, half my age of 61.
Lonely, dealing with a bonkers alcoholic ex wife that has broken me physically and mentally.
I was really at the end and in a very dark place.
He put me on Sertraline and at first it was horrible, made me feel worse, shakes, massive anxiety but after a couple of weeks this subsided and a month later I felt normal for the first time in decades.
Calm and collected about every crisis that my ex throws at me and started sorting my life out.
Still a ways to go but I feel much brighter about life and really enjoy daft little things like watching birds as I walk to work, riding my motorbike and enjoying my new Abarth.
So try the Sertraline, there's a big thread about it in the Health forum and many have found it more than helpful.
Good luck.
Last October I broke down in front of a Doctor that I had never met before, half my age of 61.
Lonely, dealing with a bonkers alcoholic ex wife that has broken me physically and mentally.
I was really at the end and in a very dark place.
He put me on Sertraline and at first it was horrible, made me feel worse, shakes, massive anxiety but after a couple of weeks this subsided and a month later I felt normal for the first time in decades.
Calm and collected about every crisis that my ex throws at me and started sorting my life out.
Still a ways to go but I feel much brighter about life and really enjoy daft little things like watching birds as I walk to work, riding my motorbike and enjoying my new Abarth.
So try the Sertraline, there's a big thread about it in the Health forum and many have found it more than helpful.
Good luck.
I've been through something big I won't go into detail on.
There is a thing these days people push around gratitude. I have this it's all great and I should appreciate it... is the mindset. But maybe that is not what you actually want. Upbringing and society can brainwash us into thinking and forcing ourselves to be happy and appreciate things. But that may not be what we actually want, or more importantly what we need.
My advice would be to really try hard to understand what you want and if there is anything that in an ideal world you would change. You may surprise yourself. It sounds like you're doing all the right things but make sure you're doing them because you want or need to not because you think it's the right thing to do.
It's worth getting tests for anything biological to rule all that out. The power our brains have over our bodies and how we are regulated is very much under appreciated and it surprised me.
If you do go and seek a psychologist for example, make sure it's someone you're happy with don't be afraid to chop and change till you get the right person. Many others may not understand what you're going through and that's always a bit tricky. People throw around the phrase first world problems but everyone has their problems and just because others have big issues it doesn't mean that each of our own aren't worthy of being taken seriously.
I could talk all day on this sort of stuff I hope it gives you some food for thought. I read a bunch of books around this sort of stuff, one stood out for me was the myth of normal by gabor mate, might be worth having a scan of youtube too. Best of luck.
There is a thing these days people push around gratitude. I have this it's all great and I should appreciate it... is the mindset. But maybe that is not what you actually want. Upbringing and society can brainwash us into thinking and forcing ourselves to be happy and appreciate things. But that may not be what we actually want, or more importantly what we need.
My advice would be to really try hard to understand what you want and if there is anything that in an ideal world you would change. You may surprise yourself. It sounds like you're doing all the right things but make sure you're doing them because you want or need to not because you think it's the right thing to do.
It's worth getting tests for anything biological to rule all that out. The power our brains have over our bodies and how we are regulated is very much under appreciated and it surprised me.
If you do go and seek a psychologist for example, make sure it's someone you're happy with don't be afraid to chop and change till you get the right person. Many others may not understand what you're going through and that's always a bit tricky. People throw around the phrase first world problems but everyone has their problems and just because others have big issues it doesn't mean that each of our own aren't worthy of being taken seriously.
I could talk all day on this sort of stuff I hope it gives you some food for thought. I read a bunch of books around this sort of stuff, one stood out for me was the myth of normal by gabor mate, might be worth having a scan of youtube too. Best of luck.
It sounds very much like depression to me. It can creep up over the years till you think it's normal and breaking out of that cycle can seem scarier than staying in the familiar dark place.
I've had depression, it not fun at all. I took the meds, they take a while but they do work, they give your mind space to reset itself.
The doc has prescribed medication but you decided not to take it because of possible side effects, the side effects to aren't guaranteed or a big deal compared with depression.
I would say try the meds for a couple of months, what have you got to lose?
I've had depression, it not fun at all. I took the meds, they take a while but they do work, they give your mind space to reset itself.
The doc has prescribed medication but you decided not to take it because of possible side effects, the side effects to aren't guaranteed or a big deal compared with depression.
I would say try the meds for a couple of months, what have you got to lose?
Thanks for the replies, plenty of food for thought.
In terms of the Sertraline, I guess my main worry was the potential for sexual issues (genital numbing/sexual dysfunction). Without being too crude, this is one area of my life that I'm not willing to risk.
Regarding hobbies, I don't really have any other than running. I struggle to find enough of an interest in anything to pusue it as a hobby.
Thanks for the book recommendation, i'll check it out.
In terms of the Sertraline, I guess my main worry was the potential for sexual issues (genital numbing/sexual dysfunction). Without being too crude, this is one area of my life that I'm not willing to risk.
Regarding hobbies, I don't really have any other than running. I struggle to find enough of an interest in anything to pusue it as a hobby.
Thanks for the book recommendation, i'll check it out.
If I was your GP were reading this I'd be really disappointed. Not because you hadn't taken my advice but because I'd failed to identify and address your misgivings about treatment and also because you didn't come back to talk about it.
Depression isn't easy to diagnose and sometimes a pragmatic trial of medication in a collaborative enterprise with your doctor is a very good plan.
I'd be inclined to give a GP visit and perhaps a trial of sertraline (probably the best place to start of all antidepressants, not least because there is a paediatric dose available for those really nervous about side effects). Be aware that side effects (nausea, headache, agitation) emerge before positive effects. I wouldn't even call these side effects. I refer to them as effects. They're a sign the drugs are getting into the brain and doing something. If you can push through, the positive effects start to come in at about a fortnight. Also the recovery pattern is non linear. You get good days and bad days. Bad days are a bummer because they are a real let down after a series of good days.
If you're really not convinced by medication or your GP, I'd be inclined to get private appointment with a psychiatrist or psychologist who also has an NHS practice (credibility check). Well targetted talking treatment can be very effective and you don't have to have 'issues' to be addressed.
I'm a strong advocate of mindfulness but you have to commit to daily practice. Set aside half an hour a day and follow a course with some structure like this book
Depression isn't easy to diagnose and sometimes a pragmatic trial of medication in a collaborative enterprise with your doctor is a very good plan.
I'd be inclined to give a GP visit and perhaps a trial of sertraline (probably the best place to start of all antidepressants, not least because there is a paediatric dose available for those really nervous about side effects). Be aware that side effects (nausea, headache, agitation) emerge before positive effects. I wouldn't even call these side effects. I refer to them as effects. They're a sign the drugs are getting into the brain and doing something. If you can push through, the positive effects start to come in at about a fortnight. Also the recovery pattern is non linear. You get good days and bad days. Bad days are a bummer because they are a real let down after a series of good days.
If you're really not convinced by medication or your GP, I'd be inclined to get private appointment with a psychiatrist or psychologist who also has an NHS practice (credibility check). Well targetted talking treatment can be very effective and you don't have to have 'issues' to be addressed.
I'm a strong advocate of mindfulness but you have to commit to daily practice. Set aside half an hour a day and follow a course with some structure like this book
This sounds like a classic case of low-level depression.
Personally, I'd spend some money on a few sessions with a good therapist. I know you say you don't have any 'issues' but I wouldn't want to drag on for another 15 years feeling the same way. I'd want to explore every avenue, not write them off.
Life is short.
Personally, I'd spend some money on a few sessions with a good therapist. I know you say you don't have any 'issues' but I wouldn't want to drag on for another 15 years feeling the same way. I'd want to explore every avenue, not write them off.
Life is short.
JoeSteveMark said:
In terms of the Sertraline, I guess my main worry was the potential for sexual issues (genital numbing/sexual dysfunction). Without being too crude, this is one area of my life that I'm not willing to risk.
From experience of many years on Citalopram and Sertraline..... the main issue is it just takes longer 
That can be good for Her and also good for you aerobically. Just need plenty of lube
super7 said:
From experience of many years on Citalopram and Sertraline..... the main issue is it just takes longer That can be good for Her and also good for you aerobically. Just need plenty of lube
A bit longer? It became f*ing Olympic event That can be good for Her and also good for you aerobically. Just need plenty of lube
Fluoxetine worked better for me, I was getting a bit old for 'endurance events'
Of course for a young chap it just means you're setting a standard you'll be expected to maintain for the rest of your life
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