Worlds itchiest R'piece
Discussion
Apols for subject matter.
Does anyone else suffer overnight from a really bloody itchy "posterior"? Obviously being asleep you end up kind of unconsciously 'savaging it red raw' by scratching leading to discomfort next morning.
Could be farmer giles related but even with "stuff" on for that, itchiness still occurs.
Anyone know a cure to stop the itching?
As I say apols for the slightly embarrassing nature of this post.
Does anyone else suffer overnight from a really bloody itchy "posterior"? Obviously being asleep you end up kind of unconsciously 'savaging it red raw' by scratching leading to discomfort next morning.
Could be farmer giles related but even with "stuff" on for that, itchiness still occurs.
Anyone know a cure to stop the itching?
As I say apols for the slightly embarrassing nature of this post.
Itchy balloon knot at night could be worms. Relatively easy to work out if its those and fairly easy to cure. if you have young kids it could definitely be a possibility.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the f
k to do 
it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the f
k to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.Silvanus said:
Itchy balloon knot at night could be worms. Relatively easy to work out if its those and fairly easy to cure. if you have young kids it could definitely be a possibility.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the fk to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the f
k to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.
That is brilliant writing, and I say that as a sufferer.
60 years of curries, kebabs, chips and ale have given me an a
hole ravaged with ex piles and anal tags.Wiping takes far longer than actually going and I dread getting caught out away from home, where I can clean up in the shower.
It may not be your problem but if so, it only takes a small amount of remaining matter to cause intense itching.
My brother is similarly afflicted. He describes it as s
tting through two aholes.Silvanus said:
Itchy balloon knot at night could be worms. Relatively easy to work out if its those and fairly easy to cure. if you have young kids it could definitely be a possibility.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the fk to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.
^^^^ definitely this years booker prize!Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the f
k to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.croyde said:
Silvanus said:
Itchy balloon knot at night could be worms. Relatively easy to work out if its those and fairly easy to cure. if you have young kids it could definitely be a possibility.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the fk to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the f
k to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.That is brilliant writing, and I say that as a sufferer.
60 years of curries, kebabs, chips and ale have given me an a
hole ravaged with ex piles and anal tags.Wiping takes far longer than actually going and I dread getting caught out away from home, where I can clean up in the shower.
It may not be your problem but if so, it only takes a small amount of remaining matter to cause intense itching.
My brother is similarly afflicted. He describes it as s
tting through two aholes.
popeyewhite said:
Hydrocortisone cream should do the trick. Failing that some kind of nappy rash emollient.
Hydrocortisone thins the skin so unless prescribed by a GP swerve that suggestion, as thin itchy skin breaks down and worse case scenario the faecal matter gets into the blood stream after a good scratch and you get sepsis.Wash your R'piece and avoid arsetrumpets during night, acid from a splattery R'piece can cause itchiness. Outside bet after trying everything else suggested - fasting blood test, diabetes can cause itching for some
Silvanus said:
Itchy balloon knot at night could be worms. Relatively easy to work out if its those and fairly easy to cure. if you have young kids it could definitely be a possibility.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the fk to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.
Don't do what my cousin did, he put capsicum cream on a raw starfish after prolonged use of toilet wetwipes, those things ruin your prison purse by stripping it of your natural oils etc. Not as ruined as the burn from chilli cream on the old dirt road. The screams when he rang me to ask what the f
k to do it turned out that deep freeze muscle spray only made it worse. The suggestion of gripping an ice pop wrapped in tissue worked.Username checks out..
popeyewhite said:
Hydrocortisone cream should do the trick. Failing that some kind of nappy rash emollient.
Daktacort or canesten Athlete's foot cream click hereI have used these, one or the other, every other day for decades and it works if you problem is fungal.
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