Nervous breakdown??
Discussion
I think I had what used to be called a 'nervous breakdown' at work yesterday…..
Things have been getting on top of me a bit recently - trying to sell our house with no luck, new house purchase fallen through, long hours at work, other work related frustrations. That, combined with a general middle aged existential crisis, came to a head Friday morning when I just started crying after a colleague asked if I was OK. Turns out I wasn't OK I guess.
Was sort of nice to cry to be honest, don't recall the last time I was in tears and that includes after the death of my Mum and finding my Dad dead in his chair a few years later. I'm not a 'big boys don't cry' sort of person, they just never came.
Anyway, I went home from work and I'm going to take a couple of days before going back. We rarely get two consecutive days off, let alone weekends, so it's kinda nice to be off.
Apart from just using this post as a means of externalising things and making it real, I'm wondering what I do next?
I get that having a few days rest is good, but what has actually changed? My perceived problems still exist, bar perhaps being physically run down, so surely the odds are good that I'll just resume the path I was on and fall off again in due course.
Anyone been down a similar road? Got any words of wisdom?
Things have been getting on top of me a bit recently - trying to sell our house with no luck, new house purchase fallen through, long hours at work, other work related frustrations. That, combined with a general middle aged existential crisis, came to a head Friday morning when I just started crying after a colleague asked if I was OK. Turns out I wasn't OK I guess.
Was sort of nice to cry to be honest, don't recall the last time I was in tears and that includes after the death of my Mum and finding my Dad dead in his chair a few years later. I'm not a 'big boys don't cry' sort of person, they just never came.
Anyway, I went home from work and I'm going to take a couple of days before going back. We rarely get two consecutive days off, let alone weekends, so it's kinda nice to be off.
Apart from just using this post as a means of externalising things and making it real, I'm wondering what I do next?
I get that having a few days rest is good, but what has actually changed? My perceived problems still exist, bar perhaps being physically run down, so surely the odds are good that I'll just resume the path I was on and fall off again in due course.
Anyone been down a similar road? Got any words of wisdom?
Rockatansky said:
I think I had what used to be called a 'nervous breakdown' at work yesterday…..
Things have been getting on top of me a bit recently - trying to sell our house with no luck, new house purchase fallen through, long hours at work, other work related frustrations. That, combined with a general middle aged existential crisis, came to a head Friday morning when I just started crying after a colleague asked if I was OK. Turns out I wasn't OK I guess.
Was sort of nice to cry to be honest, don't recall the last time I was in tears and that includes after the death of my Mum and finding my Dad dead in his chair a few years later. I'm not a 'big boys don't cry' sort of person, they just never came.
Anyway, I went home from work and I'm going to take a couple of days before going back. We rarely get two consecutive days off, let alone weekends, so it's kinda nice to be off.
Apart from just using this post as a means of externalising things and making it real, I'm wondering what I do next?
I get that having a few days rest is good, but what has actually changed? My perceived problems still exist, bar perhaps being physically run down, so surely the odds are good that I'll just resume the path I was on and fall off again in due course.
Anyone been down a similar road? Got any words of wisdom?
Speak to a doctor.Things have been getting on top of me a bit recently - trying to sell our house with no luck, new house purchase fallen through, long hours at work, other work related frustrations. That, combined with a general middle aged existential crisis, came to a head Friday morning when I just started crying after a colleague asked if I was OK. Turns out I wasn't OK I guess.
Was sort of nice to cry to be honest, don't recall the last time I was in tears and that includes after the death of my Mum and finding my Dad dead in his chair a few years later. I'm not a 'big boys don't cry' sort of person, they just never came.
Anyway, I went home from work and I'm going to take a couple of days before going back. We rarely get two consecutive days off, let alone weekends, so it's kinda nice to be off.
Apart from just using this post as a means of externalising things and making it real, I'm wondering what I do next?
I get that having a few days rest is good, but what has actually changed? My perceived problems still exist, bar perhaps being physically run down, so surely the odds are good that I'll just resume the path I was on and fall off again in due course.
Anyone been down a similar road? Got any words of wisdom?
.
Sounds like you could do with speaking to your doc and possibly a therapist. Don't get fobbed off with meds as that just masks things and could actually make it worse. What you had at work wasn't a nervous breakdown but if you don't change things you will end up having one. Trust me, been there and got the t-shirt, took me a long time to recover and even ended up in the priory for over a month to get me back on track with my mental health. 7 years on I'm a different person. Never been happier.
I'd be happier to go into more detail if it might help.
I'd be happier to go into more detail if it might help.
Rockatansky said:
I think I had what used to be called a 'nervous breakdown' at work yesterday…..
Things have been getting on top of me a bit recently - trying to sell our house with no luck, new house purchase fallen through, long hours at work, other work related frustrations. That, combined with a general middle aged existential crisis, came to a head Friday morning when I just started crying after a colleague asked if I was OK. Turns out I wasn't OK I guess.
Was sort of nice to cry to be honest, don't recall the last time I was in tears and that includes after the death of my Mum and finding my Dad dead in his chair a few years later. I'm not a 'big boys don't cry' sort of person, they just never came.
Anyway, I went home from work and I'm going to take a couple of days before going back. We rarely get two consecutive days off, let alone weekends, so it's kinda nice to be off.
Apart from just using this post as a means of externalising things and making it real, I'm wondering what I do next?
I get that having a few days rest is good, but what has actually changed? My perceived problems still exist, bar perhaps being physically run down, so surely the odds are good that I'll just resume the path I was on and fall off again in due course.
Anyone been down a similar road? Got any words of wisdom?
There’s a few different things here but basically you need to A) reduce the stressors if possible and also B) change how you view things so you don’t find them so stressful. Things have been getting on top of me a bit recently - trying to sell our house with no luck, new house purchase fallen through, long hours at work, other work related frustrations. That, combined with a general middle aged existential crisis, came to a head Friday morning when I just started crying after a colleague asked if I was OK. Turns out I wasn't OK I guess.
Was sort of nice to cry to be honest, don't recall the last time I was in tears and that includes after the death of my Mum and finding my Dad dead in his chair a few years later. I'm not a 'big boys don't cry' sort of person, they just never came.
Anyway, I went home from work and I'm going to take a couple of days before going back. We rarely get two consecutive days off, let alone weekends, so it's kinda nice to be off.
Apart from just using this post as a means of externalising things and making it real, I'm wondering what I do next?
I get that having a few days rest is good, but what has actually changed? My perceived problems still exist, bar perhaps being physically run down, so surely the odds are good that I'll just resume the path I was on and fall off again in due course.
Anyone been down a similar road? Got any words of wisdom?
Obviously if you’re great at B) you might not need to do much A) but we all have things that happen in our lives that are beyond our control so we need to be able to view them in a way which doesn’t make us feel so uncomfortable.
Your house will likely sort itself out eventually
You might be able to change your work hours or even your role or employer.
Your middle age crisis isn’t a crisis it’s a renaissance, if you use this event wisely or can make positive long term changes to your wellbeing.
You might find sharing this here and with loved ones/employer helps, it might also change the situation and give them more understanding and help address some of the things above.
Seeking professional help may be an idea, a gp can often give general info but it’s likely going to be more about symptoms suppression (often medication) which might not address the route cause (on its own) and when you possibly need longer term changes to your outlook and how you frame things?
Something like CBT might help as that’s more about changing our thought patterns and how we view the world. You can get that through the nhs but it’s likely to be talk therapy with a group rather than more focused privately with a counsellor or therapist. Also things like getting more exercise and improving you diet might help plus things like mindfulness eg headspace which is an app you can do for 10 minutes each day and can be great for helping you reframe events and not be so affected by them.
I expect you’ll look back on this as a positive experience and the point where you started a positive journey and made some real changes and gained some understanding which you’ll (and your loved ones will) benefit from hugely, well done!
Edited by anonymous-user on Saturday 6th August 16:42
Yeah speak to a doctor, it definitely sounds like you could do with a hand managing anxiety.
I was diagnosed with generalised anxiety order a couple of years ago after unknowingly living with it for at least 15 years.
I self medicated with drugs and alcohol and every now and again I would do something really stupid due to either the anxiety or the drugs/alcohol.
I’m now on Sertraline for the anxiety and I quit the other stuff. I’m much more able to manage the panic and deal with whatever is happening in a sensible way.
I was diagnosed with generalised anxiety order a couple of years ago after unknowingly living with it for at least 15 years.
I self medicated with drugs and alcohol and every now and again I would do something really stupid due to either the anxiety or the drugs/alcohol.
I’m now on Sertraline for the anxiety and I quit the other stuff. I’m much more able to manage the panic and deal with whatever is happening in a sensible way.
CoolHands said:
Pull your socks up 
(too soon?)
(too soon?)
Haha! Not too soon at all. I'm definitely in the humour as a means of deflection / coping camp so it's all good.
My colleague who (jokingly) told me to man up whilst this was going on might have been a little soon, but even he got a laugh. Followed by a swift fck off!
I'm not a fan of the idea of being medicated. On one hand if I could take a pill and make it go away that'd be great, but I don't want to be chemically suppressed. My brother took the death of my Dad badly, ended up being prescribed something or other, and it wasn't entirely constructive.
Thanks for all input though
As others have suggested, this can be a state of mind as much as anything needing actual medication.
A good doctor should be able to give immediate, albeit rather general, guidance - and, hopefully, direct you to a bit of specialist help.
Personally, I think you've already sorted out a bit yourself - asking for help from others, and keeping a weird sense of humour.
A good doctor should be able to give immediate, albeit rather general, guidance - and, hopefully, direct you to a bit of specialist help.
Personally, I think you've already sorted out a bit yourself - asking for help from others, and keeping a weird sense of humour.
There’s nothing wrong with using medication if it’s what’s needed. A lot of what’s considered psychological conditions are partially caused by chemical imbalances and the medications just help with that balance. It let’s your brain focus on what other factors might be causing your stress.
Not saying everyone needs it but don’t rule it out straight away.
Not saying everyone needs it but don’t rule it out straight away.
CoolHands said:
Can you make a plan of things you can do. Ie achievable. Rarely having 2 days off in a row doesn’t sound much fun. Can you change that.
It's not ideal, and it's not likely to change.We put pressure on the company to give us a bit more structure to our work calendar last year, and we do now have a rota of sorts. That has meant this year we get two consecutive days off every six weeks, although this has not been guaranteed due to various issues.
We're a seven day a week operation, very busy April to October, and it's pretty niche so finding part time staff to cover the busy season isn't easy. I'm not the only staff member feeing frustrated / burnt out.
dont rush to pathologise what is essentially a normal human reaction to a series of (currently) overwhelming social stressors.
watch and wait, see what happens after your time off. if you identify a pervasive pattern of affective and/or emotional instability and continued anxiety then look for your local Improved Access to Psychological Therapy service ("IAPT") and self refer.
You dont have to see your GP for a referral, the whole point of "Improved" is direct access and low-medium grade anxiety/depression is their raison d'etre
watch and wait, see what happens after your time off. if you identify a pervasive pattern of affective and/or emotional instability and continued anxiety then look for your local Improved Access to Psychological Therapy service ("IAPT") and self refer.
You dont have to see your GP for a referral, the whole point of "Improved" is direct access and low-medium grade anxiety/depression is their raison d'etre
Edited by paulmakin on Sunday 7th August 14:57
Thanks folks.
I figured having the weekend at home would be a good thing, take it easy, spend some time relaxing with Mrs Rockatansky...
She's been pretty crook over the past 36 hrs as it goes, went to bed yesterday afternoon, slept right through until the morning. I'm a little ashamed to say that niggled me a bit, this was meant to be about me, right?
Anyway, by this afternoon all is well enough to go for a small walk locally. So, we're sitting on a bench in a park area when I realise that she's not just ignoring me but that she's passed out!
I didn't get any response rubbing knuckles on the breast bone, so I got her on her side on the bench and was taking stock just before making a 999 call when she came round - totally oblivious to what had just happened.
The point is, whilst I'd rather this hadn't happened, it's a very timely message to me illustrating what's actually important.
She's fine BTW, but isn't it weird how things go sometimes....
I figured having the weekend at home would be a good thing, take it easy, spend some time relaxing with Mrs Rockatansky...
She's been pretty crook over the past 36 hrs as it goes, went to bed yesterday afternoon, slept right through until the morning. I'm a little ashamed to say that niggled me a bit, this was meant to be about me, right?
Anyway, by this afternoon all is well enough to go for a small walk locally. So, we're sitting on a bench in a park area when I realise that she's not just ignoring me but that she's passed out!
I didn't get any response rubbing knuckles on the breast bone, so I got her on her side on the bench and was taking stock just before making a 999 call when she came round - totally oblivious to what had just happened.
The point is, whilst I'd rather this hadn't happened, it's a very timely message to me illustrating what's actually important.
She's fine BTW, but isn't it weird how things go sometimes....
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