Helping an adult with dyslexia
Discussion
I'm not sure this is a 'health' topic as such, but I thought keeping it out of the lounge might give the best responses.
My girlfriend (27) has dyslexia (it seems rather severe) and has asked me for some help. Frankly, until I met her, I thought that dyslexia was just a bit of an excuse for not being especially bright - but she is smart, sharp, funny and engaging and certainly not stupid - but she can't spell and really struggles with writing. In anything other than writing and spelling she can give me a run for my money - and I'm a powerfully built company director (I'm not, but this is PH).
Over the years she's managed some 'workarounds' but has always been held back (in my view) by her dyslexia and an extreme lack of confidence it has bought. Having recently been made redundant she is now very worried about getting a new job where her issues may become a problem and workarounds might not be possible/understood.
She's asked me for help as she trusts me, not because I'm some super teacher - and frankly I don't know where to start, although I'm more than willing to put the time/effort in.
Any tips/hints/advice/stories?
My girlfriend (27) has dyslexia (it seems rather severe) and has asked me for some help. Frankly, until I met her, I thought that dyslexia was just a bit of an excuse for not being especially bright - but she is smart, sharp, funny and engaging and certainly not stupid - but she can't spell and really struggles with writing. In anything other than writing and spelling she can give me a run for my money - and I'm a powerfully built company director (I'm not, but this is PH).
Over the years she's managed some 'workarounds' but has always been held back (in my view) by her dyslexia and an extreme lack of confidence it has bought. Having recently been made redundant she is now very worried about getting a new job where her issues may become a problem and workarounds might not be possible/understood.
She's asked me for help as she trusts me, not because I'm some super teacher - and frankly I don't know where to start, although I'm more than willing to put the time/effort in.
Any tips/hints/advice/stories?
I'm not dyslexic, but when I ran my company I had many dyslexics working for me - not deliberately, it just happened. Including my Managing Director.
I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
My missus is dyslexic, I help her out by proof reading stuff before it goes anywhere where possible. Sometimes I have to get her to read it out so I have a clue about what it was supposed to say. Very odd condition dyslexia. It's worse when she is tired.
She has always avoided telling any employers as it tends to be very misunderstood.
Not sure if it's linked but she has trouble with depth perception, she can't see the 3D images at an eye test, might explain why my wheels get kerbed nearly every time she borrows my car!
She has always avoided telling any employers as it tends to be very misunderstood.
Not sure if it's linked but she has trouble with depth perception, she can't see the 3D images at an eye test, might explain why my wheels get kerbed nearly every time she borrows my car!
NDA said:
I'm not dyslexic, but when I ran my company I had many dyslexics working for me - not deliberately, it just happened. Including my Managing Director.
I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
I think that her schooling was affected by her dyslexia so she left with relatively few qualifications and to a fairly basic level and as such is in pretty basic office jobs where note taking and such are probably more the norm than data analysis.I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
I definitley see that she is wired slightly differently. She is capitalising on this with a change of direction into fashion design and is currently at night school - but will obviously have to do normal jobs and start at the bottom anyway.
I think her self esteem is already pretty low, in terms of the spelling/writing - but not generally. My thoughts were that I'm not going to be able to 'cure' her, but could help with her self esteem... I'm just not sure how!
Maxf said:
NDA said:
I'm not dyslexic, but when I ran my company I had many dyslexics working for me - not deliberately, it just happened. Including my Managing Director.
I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
I think that her schooling was affected by her dyslexia so she left with relatively few qualifications and to a fairly basic level and as such is in pretty basic office jobs where note taking and such are probably more the norm than data analysis.I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
I definitley see that she is wired slightly differently. She is capitalising on this with a change of direction into fashion design and is currently at night school - but will obviously have to do normal jobs and start at the bottom anyway.
I think her self esteem is already pretty low, in terms of the spelling/writing - but not generally. My thoughts were that I'm not going to be able to 'cure' her, but could help with her self esteem... I'm just not sure how!
There are a number of techniques and corrective spectacles available through the NHS. I would suggest that in every case of disability, there will be a local centre who really have a substantial database of treatments for such a condition.
Suggest you follow the GP/Consultant/Specialist route and see what can be done.
One thing is certain.
This is a condition which cannot be managed or treated by love and kindness alone. It is a disability which requires real knowledge, diagnosis and professional treatment. There is no cure as such but the right strategies will help.
Your offers of help and support are very constructive but the condition need professional assessment and treatment. Could you combine the two?
Suggest you follow the GP/Consultant/Specialist route and see what can be done.
One thing is certain.
This is a condition which cannot be managed or treated by love and kindness alone. It is a disability which requires real knowledge, diagnosis and professional treatment. There is no cure as such but the right strategies will help.
Your offers of help and support are very constructive but the condition need professional assessment and treatment. Could you combine the two?
I have a friend from uni who has very VERY severe dyslexia - as in can barely write/spell at all despite being extremely bright. Essentially she needs the same access stuff as someone who's blind as far as reading and writing goes - so all her work's done by dictation software and she runs a screenreader on her work and home PCs for accessing print. She uses facebook from her mobile sometimes, without all the access stuff and spells/writes on something like a 5 or 6 year old level - it must be terribly difficult to have such a severe impairment that's completely invisible until you get to some paperwork.
She's doing her Masters this year, at a good university - I'm a bit frightened for what it'll be like once she's out in the 'real world', though. She's talented and dynamic and would obviously be fantastic at whatever she decides to do with her life but the actual job application process isn't going to be easy.
Clearly most people don't have dyslexia anywhere near severe as my friend but I think quite a lot of people with moderate impairment could probably find the use of some of the assistive software very helpful in terms of being more efficient and more independent - my mate uses Dragon Dictate and Read & Write Gold, in the employment market this may be paid for by the Access To Work scheme, well worth looking into.
She's doing her Masters this year, at a good university - I'm a bit frightened for what it'll be like once she's out in the 'real world', though. She's talented and dynamic and would obviously be fantastic at whatever she decides to do with her life but the actual job application process isn't going to be easy.
Clearly most people don't have dyslexia anywhere near severe as my friend but I think quite a lot of people with moderate impairment could probably find the use of some of the assistive software very helpful in terms of being more efficient and more independent - my mate uses Dragon Dictate and Read & Write Gold, in the employment market this may be paid for by the Access To Work scheme, well worth looking into.
NDA said:
I'm not dyslexic, but when I ran my company I had many dyslexics working for me - not deliberately, it just happened. Including my Managing Director.
I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
spot on NDA!I found them to be 'wired' differently, in a good way. They would spot, for example, commercial trends intuitively - way before anyone else.
It should not hold her back, particularly in an age of 'spell check'. What will hold her back is losing her self esteem....
Dyslexics are able to see the whole picture a lot easier but miss some of the detail!
Dyslexics can't learn multiplication tables parrot fashion so learn to calculate the tables really fast!
I remember when i could do integration by parts in my head, but the ironic thing is i need a spell checker to spell integration!
HTH.. Kara Tointon from Eastenders..
http://www.bdadyslexia.org.uk/news/kara-tointon.ht...
My 7 year old is dyslexic and trying to get the teachers to do something is like banging our heads against a brick wall. All we get is, ' Well he is a boy and boys develop slower and are lazy'
We didnt want to wait 4 years to be told at High School he has issues so we took him to the Indigo centre in Norwich. Fantastic setup with very knowledgable staff.
Worked out he has mild/medium dyslexia which can be 'retuned' as we have time to help him adjust. By working through different overlays, they found that placing a violet transparency over his reading, it makes it a lot easier for him.
They have some great ideas and information to help stop the low self esteem issues arising.
http://www.4dyslexics.com/index.htm
I hope this helps.
Kev
Steffan said:
There are a number of techniques and corrective spectacles available through the NHS. I would suggest that in every case of disability, there will be a local centre who really have a substantial database of treatments for such a condition.
Suggest you follow the GP/Consultant/Specialist route and see what can be done.
One thing is certain.
This is a condition which cannot be managed or treated by love and kindness alone. It is a disability which requires real knowledge, diagnosis and professional treatment. There is no cure as such but the right strategies will help.
Am nodding in agreement at this. A close friend (early 40s) admitted to herself and family last year about having dyslexia and was worried due to being unemployed at the time - she's always talked a good game in to sales or recruitment roles, but was struggling to get something suitable given the job market. Her GP took her concerns seriously, organised tests and over the course of several months and several consultations with a specialist, they've identified exactly what it is she struggles with and have put in place techniques and methods (including a yellow tinted overlay) that all combine to make life much easier now.Suggest you follow the GP/Consultant/Specialist route and see what can be done.
One thing is certain.
This is a condition which cannot be managed or treated by love and kindness alone. It is a disability which requires real knowledge, diagnosis and professional treatment. There is no cure as such but the right strategies will help.
Maxf said:
I think that her schooling was affected by her dyslexia so she left with relatively few qualifications and to a fairly basic level and as such is in pretty basic office jobs where note taking and such are probably more the norm than data analysis.
I definitley see that she is wired slightly differently. She is capitalising on this with a change of direction into fashion design and is currently at night school - but will obviously have to do normal jobs and start at the bottom anyway.
I think her self esteem is already pretty low, in terms of the spelling/writing - but not generally. My thoughts were that I'm not going to be able to 'cure' her, but could help with her self esteem... I'm just not sure how!
If she's really having an issue, I'd be happy to meet with you both for a coffee in London. I was Chairman and CEO of a large company and would be happy to natter to her about how relatively inconsequential dyslexia is in some commercial fields. You need (she needs) to nip this one in the bud fairly smartly.....I definitley see that she is wired slightly differently. She is capitalising on this with a change of direction into fashion design and is currently at night school - but will obviously have to do normal jobs and start at the bottom anyway.
I think her self esteem is already pretty low, in terms of the spelling/writing - but not generally. My thoughts were that I'm not going to be able to 'cure' her, but could help with her self esteem... I'm just not sure how!
Thanks for all of the replies, and the incredibly generous offer NDA.
Everything is a little less straight forward as she's not a UK citizen, so can't really benefit from the NHS/UK charities. I'm going to talk to her and offer her the help I can, but realistically try and focus on getting her to see a specialist who can help her more comprehensively - I think she tried this before but she gets very frustrated quite easily.
It's incredibly frustrating when you can see such talent and prospects in somebody, but also see them holding themselves back from realising it. I'll do what I can!
Everything is a little less straight forward as she's not a UK citizen, so can't really benefit from the NHS/UK charities. I'm going to talk to her and offer her the help I can, but realistically try and focus on getting her to see a specialist who can help her more comprehensively - I think she tried this before but she gets very frustrated quite easily.
It's incredibly frustrating when you can see such talent and prospects in somebody, but also see them holding themselves back from realising it. I'll do what I can!
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