365 days without booze... join me?

[Blib]

swanseaboydan said:

Just done 5 months sober - couldn’t be happier - I do have the occasional urge but I would like to think that I am never going back

Well done!

Having a passing thought or two early doors is perfectly normal. As you now knows, those thoughts always pass.

They don't control you at all.

[donkmeister]

swanseaboydan said:

Just done 5 months sober - couldn’t be happier - I do have the occasional urge but I would like to think that I am never going back

I made that mistake years back. I'd done my usual "stop drinking for a month in summer to prove to myself I didn't need it", it carried on for 4-5 months. Then I finished a particularly difficult DIY project and decided I'd earned it. Within weeks I went back to drinking more than I thought I should and felt very annoyed at myself.

Edited by donkmeister on Sunday 3rd March 16:01

[donkmeister]

ZedLeg said:

Good stuff Rod, I've been thinking about whether I would be able to manage going out and having a couple of pints.

I'm currently in the process of being made redundant though, so I'm pretty sure it's my brain trying to gaslight me into some good old fashioned depression drinking

Very self-aware, that's a good thing!!!

It's a slippery slope. We're currently going through some big life stresses here and a few times I've thought about how a good soak in liquid anti-depressant used to be a way of coping. I very quickly remind myself that it never solved anything, just made me feel tired and grumpy the next day!

[NaePasaran]

Managed somewhat quite easily to moderate my intake on nights (and days) out which for me is quite an achievement. I was always chasing the next drink, even at 1am after 10 pints. I'm now quite content having a few beers and heading home.

However another issue is what 4-5 pints can do to sleep. 5 pints would maybe just get me at the "tipsy" stage so nowhere near drunk, but completely mess's with the sleep for 2-3 nights. That inturn ****s the diet, exercise, cooking, uni etc etc. Can't be bothered with any good stuff in but crave the bad stuff, mostly sugar, crisps and doom scrolling on social media while half asleep on the couch. All because of 5 Guinness!!

Anyway, now time to add some completely dry socialising into the mix, started with last night's Sunday roast carrying onto the weekend for mother's day and the football and beyond...

[ZedLeg]

donkmeister said:

ZedLeg said:

Good stuff Rod, I've been thinking about whether I would be able to manage going out and having a couple of pints.

I'm currently in the process of being made redundant though, so I'm pretty sure it's my brain trying to gaslight me into some good old fashioned depression drinking

Very self-aware, that's a good thing!!!

I'm very good at justifying bad behaviour so I have to be tough on myself

[Big Rod]

ZedLeg said:

I'm very good at justifying bad behaviour so I have to be tough on myself

Aye, ain't that the truth.

I'm pleased to report that after my last couple of weekend's planned dalliances I spent the weekend sober despite having a very difficult week work wise.

I did have urges but they passed and was able to pick up my Wife and Daughter from the train station late on Saturday night which also saved on a taxi fare, (although I did have to put £40 of motion lotion in my Wife's car 'cos it was all but empty!), which was nice. Also the desire to attend the gym on Saturday morning was a distinct deterrent to 'taking the edge off' on Friday night.

I discovered 'St Peter's Without' in Tesco which is a delicious malty Suffolk 0.0% beer. It goes down really nice.

I am still a little weirded out by driving while having the taste of beer in my mouth and must be mindful in future if I do indulge.

[dirtbiker]

Bit of a fail for me here, went out to stay with friends at the weekend and ended up having some sparkling wine and some red. I'd done well with AF beers in the pub beforehand but the glasses had been poured and I didn't want to say no. I then had two unnecessary beers with my tea the following day just because they were in the fridge.

Annoying! Ah well, that was the end of a 33-day streak and I feel much better so on to the next one!

[Blib]

dirtbiker said:

Bit of a fail for me here, went out to stay with friends at the weekend and ended up having some sparkling wine and some red. I'd done well with AF beers in the pub beforehand but the glasses had been poured and I didn't want to say no. I then had two unnecessary beers with my tea the following day just because they were in the fridge.

Annoying! Ah well, that was the end of a 33-day streak and I feel much better so on to the next one!

It's never a complete fail.

You will have learnt one or two things about your processes around alcohol and abstinence. This will certainly help you in your future efforts.

[chris4652009]

I did dry January and have decided to continue with it.
I feel so much better, was clearly drinking far to often/much

[donkmeister]

Blib said:

dirtbiker said:

Bit of a fail for me here, went out to stay with friends at the weekend and ended up having some sparkling wine and some red. I'd done well with AF beers in the pub beforehand but the glasses had been poured and I didn't want to say no. I then had two unnecessary beers with my tea the following day just because they were in the fridge.

Annoying! Ah well, that was the end of a 33-day streak and I feel much better so on to the next one!

It's never a complete fail.

You will have learnt one or two things about your processes around alcohol and abstinence. This will certainly help you in your future efforts.

Agreed.

Also, dirtbiker I would say you should never feel compelled to drink a drink someone has poured. Sometimes people do it because they simply don't know you are giving it a miss, sometimes because they think it's polite to give you the choice. I'm guilty of offering cake to people I know are dieting, which is akin to that second one.

The people who need to be watched are those who want to make you drink. I've heard horror stories of recovering alcoholics relapsing after some cretin serves them an alcoholic drink whilst telling them it's not.

[dirtbiker]

donkmeister said:

Blib said:

dirtbiker said:

Bit of a fail for me here, went out to stay with friends at the weekend and ended up having some sparkling wine and some red. I'd done well with AF beers in the pub beforehand but the glasses had been poured and I didn't want to say no. I then had two unnecessary beers with my tea the following day just because they were in the fridge.

Annoying! Ah well, that was the end of a 33-day streak and I feel much better so on to the next one!

It's never a complete fail.

You will have learnt one or two things about your processes around alcohol and abstinence. This will certainly help you in your future efforts.

Agreed.

Also, dirtbiker I would say you should never feel compelled to drink a drink someone has poured. Sometimes people do it because they simply don't know you are giving it a miss, sometimes because they think it's polite to give you the choice. I'm guilty of offering cake to people I know are dieting, which is akin to that second one.

The people who need to be watched are those who want to make you drink. I've heard horror stories of recovering alcoholics relapsing after some cretin serves them an alcoholic drink whilst telling them it's not.

Thanks guys, I wasn't sure whether to post but I'm glad that I did. To be fair it was my wife who poured the drinks but I've maybe not been completely clear with her what my intentions are. Still, there was no hangover and I was fully present for my kids on Sunday which is my overall goal so I'm not counting it as a complete fail, thanks Blib!

[Barchettaman]

For various reasons I didn’t do dry January, which is pretty much routine for us, and instead Mrs B and I are doing dry March.

I have to say so far it’s been a breeze. The main difference: nobody talks about dry January so booze isn’t as much a topic of conversation!

I also have some massive gigs coming up at the end of the month so am enjoying the better quality sleep and general benefits of sobriety.

I won’t push into April though.

[The Dictator]

This thread motivated me to extend my usual (well 3rd) dry January and I am at just over 70 days now. I have set myself a target of 100 days (I know, I know) but didn't commit to that until the last week.

I read the Alan Carr book and it really made me think. I don't have plans to stop completely, but I am really considering my relationship with alcohol and am determined to alter my habits - I'm currently reading Atomic Habits.

I have found it easier than I expected and putting a dot in the boxes on the fridge to mark progress every few days is quite satisfying.

I have saved probably £400 or so by this point, so well worth it for that alone. I have also lost about half a stone, but was expecting my sleep to improve, but it hasn't, if anything I am waking up much earlier and then not getting back to sleep.

This thread has been an inspiration, thank you to all participants sharing your stories and successes or otherwise, I feel enlightened and positive about my future approach to alcohol.

[chris4652009]

chris4652009 said:

I did dry January and have decided to continue with it.
I feel so much better, was clearly drinking far to often/much

Update: still dry

[Blib]

chris4652009 said:

chris4652009 said:

I did dry January and have decided to continue with it.
I feel so much better, was clearly drinking far to often/much

Update: still dry

Any observations for people contemplating a period of sobriety?

[donkmeister]

Barchettaman said:

I also have some massive gigs coming up at the end of the month so am enjoying the better quality sleep and general benefits of sobriety.

I won’t push into April though.

Never say never

If you get to the end of the month and fancy a drink, that's your choice, you're a grown-up. But don't feel you have to have a drink. I succumbed to "beer pressure" a few times in my 20s after my annual abstainious months and TBH always wished I hadn't simply because it felt like it wasn't my choice but rather an arbitrary date and my friends ribbing me.

Depending on your age that might not be an issue of course; by the time you're 40 I think most people have known at least one person becomes a full-blown alcoholic and get into difficulty, so are a bit more considerate.

[donkmeister]

chris4652009 said:

chris4652009 said:

I did dry January and have decided to continue with it.
I feel so much better, was clearly drinking far to often/much

Update: still dry

A suggestion, and apologies if you've already said you are doing it...

If your financial situation allows it, set aside what you WOULD have spent on booze. Stick it in a separate account if you can, for some banks it's really easy to do that online.

Then decide on something expensive that you want, that is worth about the same as say, a year of drink. When you hit that milestone, buy it. Enjoy the crap out of it. Take pride each and every time you see it or think of it, knowing that you bloody well earned it.

[chris4652009]

donkmeister said:

chris4652009 said:

chris4652009 said:

I did dry January and have decided to continue with it.
I feel so much better, was clearly drinking far to often/much

Update: still dry

A suggestion, and apologies if you've already said you are doing it...

If your financial situation allows it, set aside what you WOULD have spent on booze. Stick it in a separate account if you can, for some banks it's really easy to do that online.

Then decide on something expensive that you want, that is worth about the same as say, a year of drink. When you hit that milestone, buy it. Enjoy the crap out of it. Take pride each and every time you see it or think of it, knowing that you bloody well earned it.

Already doing it, currently have £1153 sat in a separate account that is growing every month via scheduled payment. But yes that's an excellent suggestion.

[chris4652009]

Blib said:

chris4652009 said:

chris4652009 said:

I did dry January and have decided to continue with it.
I feel so much better, was clearly drinking far to often/much

Update: still dry

Any observations for people contemplating a period of sobriety?

Resting heart rate is down and consistent
Much more energy especially noticeable at weekends
Don't hide away from going out, drink NA beers instead of coke.
Of my circle of friends only one doesn't get it, he's the definition of an alcoholic and tbh quite pitiful the way he lives.

[Blib]

chris4652009 said:

Blib said:

chris4652009 said:

chris4652009 said:

I did dry January and have decided to continue with it.
I feel so much better, was clearly drinking far to often/much

Update: still dry

Any observations for people contemplating a period of sobriety?

Resting heart rate is down and consistent
Much more energy especially noticeable at weekends
Don't hide away from going out, drink NA beers instead of coke.
Of my circle of friends only one doesn't get it, he's the definition of an alcoholic and tbh quite pitiful the way he lives.

Thanks for that.

As for your friend who doesn't get it, your sobriety alone may help him make a change. You don't have to say a word.