Calling the Sexperts

Calling the Sexperts

Poll: Calling the Sexperts

Total Members Polled: 566

Probably a prostitute: 64%
Any girl would say that: 2%
Definitely wants a shag: 34%
Author
Discussion

Mobsta

Original Poster:

5,614 posts

263 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Earlier today, I parked on the drive, was walking inside (house conversion into appartments) when I bumped into an attractive lady who seemed to have come from the mail pigeon holes, started chatted to her on the stairs. I was in a hurry, shamefully not giving her my full attention, but seem to remember her being dark-ish skinned, thirty-something, kinda pretty IIRC, (couldnt be more vague if I tried!) but what I remember most was her energy. She was very confidently charming, but also strangely confident. Kinda liked her.

Knowing someone had recently moved into the building, I asked if she was one of the new neighbours. She wasnt, said she was seeing a friend, and was knocking on her friends(?) door when I said goodbye - off I trotted.

Hopped into my car this evening, to find a note on the windscreen in an envelope addressed to Mobsta.
With her name changed, it read:

Hello my name is Sarah.
Today I met you on the
Stairs.

'Do you ever get lonely
Sometimes I do'

You may call me if you
like !! x

Tel 07892......

hehe

I mean come, on WTF.
Whats with the lonely comment? In quotes just like that, too!?!

Is this merely the sign of a cheeky lady - or the calling card of pay-as-you-go soliciting cat flap slapping devil-fornicator?
Is was wonderfully forward, I must admit.

Thing is, when I first walked into the building, she was standing by the pigeon holes. I had mail, so she might have seen my first name on one of my envelopes. And I dont think I actually remembered seeing her walk inside the middle floor appartment of 'her friend' either - I remember her knocking, and thinking at the time, it was funny she popped down to check her friends mail, and locked herself out. All of the doors here are normal, and dont shut by themselves.

I picked up a free ads paper on my way back this evening, going to scan through the dodgy numbers at the back to see if I can find hers.

Over to you lot. You may fire when ready etc...

OllieWinchester

5,682 posts

200 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Get her to come round but purposely remove any money or anything of value from your premises. Do the deed. Await gang of Albanians to come round and beat you half to death.

anonymous-user

62 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
ha blatantly dirt box dave...100% prostitute

POORCARDEALER

8,545 posts

249 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all


nail her in every hole, but she is far too forward for girlfriend material imo

Mobsta

Original Poster:

5,614 posts

263 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Right. Thats that then.
And to think I thought she might have just been a nice but very forward girl rolleyes
hehe

Nolar Dog

8,786 posts

203 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
She's a thief with a PAYG SIM card that will be switched off as soon as she has been in your flat and robbed you.

HTH

TheEnd

15,370 posts

196 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
If you have a bath in your flat, stock up on icecubes. It could save your life.

LukeBird

17,170 posts

217 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Mobsta said:
or the calling card of pay-as-you-go soliciting cat flap slapping devil-fornicator?
rofl

Have to say, top form on the euphemisms tonight gents! thumbuprofl

MitchT

16,262 posts

217 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
You appear to have only posted part of her number hehe

ETA: Has she left her card on lots of car windscreens or just yours?

Edited by MitchT on Wednesday 25th February 22:29

Pesty

42,655 posts

264 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
You don't need both your kidneys. Go for it smile

are
a) extremely handsome with a Brad pitt like body
b) Multi Milionaire

If none of the above she's a prostitute

Edited by Pesty on Wednesday 25th February 22:29

Jack Blag

941 posts

221 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Where's the "DEFINITELY a prostitute" option? biggrin

BlueCello

6,225 posts

215 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
She's a stalker. She has been following you for weeks. She reads your mail. She knows what you drive. She knows your name. SHE KNOWS WHERE YOU LIVE.







She's probably well up for it too wink

Dupont666

21,680 posts

200 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
ask for a free road test before you buy?

fido

17,294 posts

263 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Text the number and ask 'what is your hourly rate? mobsta xxx'. That should clear things up.

Toobin

1,222 posts

242 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
MitchT said:
You appear to have only posted part of her number hehe
yeh and 30 wrong numbers later I still can't find her .. dam it .. back to babe station for me

Amaboknaai

1,756 posts

204 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
If she is going to take him out, it shouldn't worry him 'cos he is a Hitman...cue Mr & Mrs Smith!

thehawk

9,335 posts

215 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Google the number.

king arthur

6,998 posts

269 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
How does she know which is your car? And how do you know her real name isn't Sarah?

Stedman

7,291 posts

200 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
BRING ON THE TRUMPETS!

Im quite surprised certain stock cubes havent been mentioned yet...

Drop her a txt and get back to us biggrin

Teppic

7,514 posts

265 months

Wednesday 25th February 2009
quotequote all
Check and see if she's listed on punternet.com?