Organising a stag do
Discussion
So i'm best man. Brilliant over the moon well happy. But sorting this out is a ballache. long and short of it is we have managed to agree a date. and then agree to fly "somewhere"
How do i go about organising this.
Do collect from everyone and book all the flights and hotels? Do i get everyone to pay and phone their own flights and hotels and just give them the details?
How do i go about organising this.
Do collect from everyone and book all the flights and hotels? Do i get everyone to pay and phone their own flights and hotels and just give them the details?
First time I did this I booked and paid for it all on my cards and then spent months chasing for money - never again - esp given I was still owed money after the fact.
Second and third times I asked for money upfront and then booked it all - much easier - the only draw back was the third time it was staged payments as it was quite pricey (Thailand) and not really reasonable to ask everyone to pull out £1k+ in one go.
Getting people to sort themselves will invariably result in lots not sorting/booking etc and it’ll fall apart quickly.
Second and third times I asked for money upfront and then booked it all - much easier - the only draw back was the third time it was staged payments as it was quite pricey (Thailand) and not really reasonable to ask everyone to pull out £1k+ in one go.
Getting people to sort themselves will invariably result in lots not sorting/booking etc and it’ll fall apart quickly.
Less is more
Potentially have an fancier one with smaller numbers
Then bigger one locally
Personally I wouldn’t dip my hand in my pocket for unknowns, people are twits
If I was going to announce a big overseas job, I would state the hotel you are staying in and the dates, let everyone make their own arrangements
Potentially have an fancier one with smaller numbers
Then bigger one locally
Personally I wouldn’t dip my hand in my pocket for unknowns, people are twits
If I was going to announce a big overseas job, I would state the hotel you are staying in and the dates, let everyone make their own arrangements
Spare tyre said:
If I was going to announce a big overseas job, I would state the hotel you are staying in and the dates, let everyone make their own arrangements
This.If you don’t do it this way you will be out of pocket by a few hundred quid.
Also booking 20 people on a flight is a pain.
I regularly organise trips for groups of blokes, if you have decided a date ask them to send you a deposit which has to be the flight cost rounded up to the next £25 (it keeps the maths easier) set a deadline for getting the money & stick to it. Just book flights for those who have paid, no exceptions. Next stage get money for hotels on same principle, you can build up a float for the actual event, for taxi transfers etc.
If people are late in paying give them the details & let them book it for themselves, they probably won’t.
If you want to have a whip, it’s tricky in these days of no cash, so easier to use an app called Splitwise. Make sure everyone pays something as it goes along though and doesn’t get out step.
If people are late in paying give them the details & let them book it for themselves, they probably won’t.
If you want to have a whip, it’s tricky in these days of no cash, so easier to use an app called Splitwise. Make sure everyone pays something as it goes along though and doesn’t get out step.
I used a company called last night of freedom when I was a best man for a mate. Primarily because they handle the payments via their website with each attendee given a login to use to pay their balance.
Probably a bit more pricey than booking everything individually but well worth it given I wasn't having to chase 15 people for money each month.
Probably a bit more pricey than booking everything individually but well worth it given I wasn't having to chase 15 people for money each month.
Spare tyre said:
Less is more
Potentially have an fancier one with smaller numbers
Then bigger one locally
Personally I wouldn’t dip my hand in my pocket for unknowns, people are twits
If I was going to announce a big overseas job, I would state the hotel you are staying in and the dates, let everyone make their own arrangements
I went on one to Munich with 10 of us. We just agreed what flights and hotel for what dates and booked ourselves.Potentially have an fancier one with smaller numbers
Then bigger one locally
Personally I wouldn’t dip my hand in my pocket for unknowns, people are twits
If I was going to announce a big overseas job, I would state the hotel you are staying in and the dates, let everyone make their own arrangements
There were 2 others who were meant to go. Most of the group didn’t really know them but they knew the groom. They replied once to say they were coming but then never bothered to book. I’d say if someone booked up front for them we’d have never seen the cash and they still wouldn’t have gone.
I’d recommend using an app called Splitwise to track who pays for what whilst you’re out there so it’s easy to sort out when you’re home.
I have organized a few one to Munich and one to Marbella. The Marbella one I was left out of pocket and people bailed last minute.
I used BA for flights as you pay a deposit, and then pay the rest a few weeks before you go. I got the deposit money upfront, and then everyone could use the booking reference and pay the rest of the flight.
Hotels can be more of a pain. Just find somewhere to stay, either they can book it themselves, or you just get people to pay upfront by a certain time and if they don't they are not going.
Never pay yourself for everyone and chase the money. You will be out of pocket.
I used BA for flights as you pay a deposit, and then pay the rest a few weeks before you go. I got the deposit money upfront, and then everyone could use the booking reference and pay the rest of the flight.
Hotels can be more of a pain. Just find somewhere to stay, either they can book it themselves, or you just get people to pay upfront by a certain time and if they don't they are not going.
Never pay yourself for everyone and chase the money. You will be out of pocket.
asfault said:
So i'm best man. Brilliant over the moon well happy. But sorting this out is a ballache. long and short of it is we have managed to agree a date. and then agree to fly "somewhere"
How do i go about organising this.
Do collect from everyone and book all the flights and hotels? Do i get everyone to pay and phone their own flights and hotels and just give them the details?
One thing to add, I would check how many people wanted to come. How do i go about organising this.
Do collect from everyone and book all the flights and hotels? Do i get everyone to pay and phone their own flights and hotels and just give them the details?
For the Munich trip we had 10, small group, all close mates and no issue with payments and getting them organised.
The Marbella trip the groom opened it up and loads of people said they would come, when I was booking things like hotels they soon started bailing and thats when I was losing money.
Last stag do I went on about a year before the date the best man told everyone that was invited where we were going, for how long and how much the total was. He then set dates when certain monies had to be paid by (I think we made four payments of a couple of hundred quid throughout the course). The actual numbers were determined by the first payment - miss that date and you weren't coming, any refunds if you couldn't make it wouldn't be given until after the wedding. Worked well, I think there were about eight of us including the groom so not too big a group too.
Figure out where you want to go and find a friendly local travel agent to put it together for you.
They will need a deposit so you can simply say to people "if you're in we need a deposit by end of the day on Friday for the travel agent to book it". That way people have to commit, they are either in or out.
Don't put the stress of having to collect money, chase people, making bookings and deal with last minute bailers on yourself. Even if it works out a few quid more for a travel agent to do it, it'll be worth every penny if people start dicking you around.
They will need a deposit so you can simply say to people "if you're in we need a deposit by end of the day on Friday for the travel agent to book it". That way people have to commit, they are either in or out.
Don't put the stress of having to collect money, chase people, making bookings and deal with last minute bailers on yourself. Even if it works out a few quid more for a travel agent to do it, it'll be worth every penny if people start dicking you around.
Admittedly this is second hand experience, but :
A few years ago, I knew somebody who was going on a group holiday - one person booked the flights and hotels, and they all paid her.
However - the trip was cancelled - I can't remember why, but it was something out of their control - i.e. a volcano / covid / hurricane - something like that.
Because it was a group booking by one person - it was that one person who had to deal with the flight / hotel cancellations, handle the refunds - and then distribute them to other people etc.
Obviously it's pretty unlikely to happen - but if it does, you become responsible for sorting out the "group" rather than everybody sorting their own stuff out.
A few years ago, I knew somebody who was going on a group holiday - one person booked the flights and hotels, and they all paid her.
However - the trip was cancelled - I can't remember why, but it was something out of their control - i.e. a volcano / covid / hurricane - something like that.
Because it was a group booking by one person - it was that one person who had to deal with the flight / hotel cancellations, handle the refunds - and then distribute them to other people etc.
Obviously it's pretty unlikely to happen - but if it does, you become responsible for sorting out the "group" rather than everybody sorting their own stuff out.
Congrats, it’s fun when done right
1) come up with an idea. If abroad for a stag I suggest Amsterdam, cheap to get to and lots to do.
2) draft a budget for what it will cost with activities
3) show budget to all attendees in a WhatsApp or quick group and ask who will come.
4) ask for the money up front (absolutely key, don’t take any financial risk, someone WILL fleece you)
5) enjoy
1) come up with an idea. If abroad for a stag I suggest Amsterdam, cheap to get to and lots to do.
2) draft a budget for what it will cost with activities
3) show budget to all attendees in a WhatsApp or quick group and ask who will come.
4) ask for the money up front (absolutely key, don’t take any financial risk, someone WILL fleece you)
5) enjoy
Money collection is always the hardest part of any group event.
I've done stag events, golfing weekends, and annual skiing trips in the past. I adjust the money collection method depending on the actual attendees and how well I know them and their credit rating
For the past annual ski trips, it was always a close circle of friends (all AAA credit rating
) so when I get the nod, I book on CC and pay upfront for my 5/6 friends knowing refund is almost immediate.
For golfing trips, I ask for a deposit on a X date, and book. If anyone fails to settle the balance on Y date, their place is cancelled and they forfeit the deposit. I can't avoid paying the deposit to firm up the rooms and tee times (golf trip without tee times is a no go!)
For stag events (and same for casual / overseas trips), I would ask for a deposit say £100 (not a huge amount, but enough to make people think) to show they are committed, and provide the specific flight and hotel details for them to book direct. The £100 deposit goes towards the grooms contribution, any planned events, and any surplus is used to pay for the bar/lunch etc..
I've done stag events, golfing weekends, and annual skiing trips in the past. I adjust the money collection method depending on the actual attendees and how well I know them and their credit rating

For the past annual ski trips, it was always a close circle of friends (all AAA credit rating

For golfing trips, I ask for a deposit on a X date, and book. If anyone fails to settle the balance on Y date, their place is cancelled and they forfeit the deposit. I can't avoid paying the deposit to firm up the rooms and tee times (golf trip without tee times is a no go!)
For stag events (and same for casual / overseas trips), I would ask for a deposit say £100 (not a huge amount, but enough to make people think) to show they are committed, and provide the specific flight and hotel details for them to book direct. The £100 deposit goes towards the grooms contribution, any planned events, and any surplus is used to pay for the bar/lunch etc..
Edited by chip* on Monday 16th December 11:01
x5tuu said:
Second and third times I asked for money upfront and then booked it all - much easier - the only draw back was the third time it was staged payments as it was quite pricey (Thailand) and not really reasonable to ask everyone to pull out £1k+ in one go.
Thailand? For a stag do? What could possibly go wrong?!!
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