Urgent Help - Divorce related?
Discussion
A word of warning on Legal Aid, if you retain the marital home then you will be required to repay it, if you don't have the funds available then they will place a legal charge on the property for the amount outstanding and it will incur interest charges as well.
If your circumstances change during the case then the Legal Aid certificate can be cancelled, leaving you to repay and then hire your solicitor on a private basis.
Often seperate aspects of you case will need different Legal Aid certs, each one will have a different maximum amount of aid.
Be aware that you won't just be liable for your solicitors and barristers costs, but you may end up pay his as well, plus any associated court fees for applications and should the need arise, the judges time.
With regard to the mortage, you may well be able to remove either one of you from the deeds, giving you legal title to the property but the Mortage co may insist that you both stay on the mortgage, obviously should the other party default, this can have a massive impact on the others credit rating.
Sorry, very hung over this morning, so this maybe a little disjointed.
If your circumstances change during the case then the Legal Aid certificate can be cancelled, leaving you to repay and then hire your solicitor on a private basis.
Often seperate aspects of you case will need different Legal Aid certs, each one will have a different maximum amount of aid.
Be aware that you won't just be liable for your solicitors and barristers costs, but you may end up pay his as well, plus any associated court fees for applications and should the need arise, the judges time.
With regard to the mortage, you may well be able to remove either one of you from the deeds, giving you legal title to the property but the Mortage co may insist that you both stay on the mortgage, obviously should the other party default, this can have a massive impact on the others credit rating.
Sorry, very hung over this morning, so this maybe a little disjointed.
pikey said:
Zen. said:
Can I add, you need to draw up a will NOW, do not delay, you will then need to amend it once you are divorced.
Why is that?JonRB said:
Zen. said:
You need to sort the financials first then the divorce IMO.
When the hangover clears, read back to my post on this subject because I don't agree. Zen. said:
I acted under the advice of the district Judge and sorted everything else that needed to be done, prior to the absolute.
Oh, sorry. Yes, you must get everything sorted before the Absolute. You seemed to be saying that you shouldn't commence the divorce (ie. issue the Petition) until the financials had been sorted out and that is what I disagreed with.
pikey said:
Why is that?
Because in the absence of an explicit will, everything will go to the surviving partner which may no longer be what you wish. If you own a house then you should change the ownership from 'Joint Tenants' (ie. you jointly hold 100% ownership) to 'Tenants in Common' (ie. you own 50% each). Because in the former, the surviving partner gets all of it whereas in the latter they only get 50% and the other defers to your Will. And in the absence of a Will it will be Intestate which is obviously not such a great thing.
Incidentally, I should heed my own advice as we're still Joint Tenants and I haven't sorted a Will yet.
Edited by JonRB on Friday 27th March 10:46
JonRB said:
Zen. said:
I acted under the advice of the district Judge and sorted everything else that needed to be done, prior to the absolute.
Oh, sorry. Yes, you must get everything sorted before the Absolute. You seemed to be saying that you shouldn't commence the divorce (ie. issue the Petition) until the financials had been sorted out and that is what I disagreed with.
Brain has officially emploded.
Thanks for the post tho Zen you advice seems to be the way I was originally thinking by sorting the crap out first the divorce bit will be easier. But then I suppose it doesn't hurt to start the proceedings.
As for the will - well for the moment I will just promise not to die.
I am not at work again today, son is still poorly so doing some work from home as I have deadlines today but also taking half a day leave so that I can draft a letter to the ex. Its going to be very legal speak but I am hoping it might be a good first step in resolving some of the things. I am going to fairly explicit with my intentions.
I also spoke to the school and explained the situation and the headmistress said that there had been a noticable decline in sons well being and they are willing to support the temporary stop of access.
ETA: oh ok you are both saying the same thing start the proceedings, thinks that what I said to
Thanks for the post tho Zen you advice seems to be the way I was originally thinking by sorting the crap out first the divorce bit will be easier. But then I suppose it doesn't hurt to start the proceedings.
As for the will - well for the moment I will just promise not to die.
I am not at work again today, son is still poorly so doing some work from home as I have deadlines today but also taking half a day leave so that I can draft a letter to the ex. Its going to be very legal speak but I am hoping it might be a good first step in resolving some of the things. I am going to fairly explicit with my intentions.
I also spoke to the school and explained the situation and the headmistress said that there had been a noticable decline in sons well being and they are willing to support the temporary stop of access.
ETA: oh ok you are both saying the same thing start the proceedings, thinks that what I said to
Edited by Stigette on Friday 27th March 10:44
Stigette said:
Thanks for the post tho Zen you advice seems to be the way I was originally thinking by sorting the crap out first the divorce bit will be easier. But then I suppose it doesn't hurt to start the proceedings.
For the avoidance of doubt, Zen and I are actually both saying the same thing: Don't delay in starting the divorce process (issuing the Petition) but get all the financials sorted out before it completes (gaining the Decree Absolute). So my advice is unchanged there and it seems Zen wasn't disagreeing with me after all.
Edited by JonRB on Friday 27th March 10:45
JonRB said:
Stigette said:
Thanks for the post tho Zen you advice seems to be the way I was originally thinking by sorting the crap out first the divorce bit will be easier. But then I suppose it doesn't hurt to start the proceedings.
For the avoidance of doubt, Zen and I are actually both saying the same thing: Don't delay in starting the divorce process (issuing the Petition) but get all the financials sorted out before it completes (gaining the Decree Absolute). So my advice is unchanged there and it seems Zen wasn't disagreeing with me after all.
Edited by JonRB on Friday 27th March 10:45
Please for the sake of £100 do your Will, horrid things happen at the worst possible time, I know people don't like thinking/talking about death, but you have a child and there are matters which really need to be addressed.
Yes to confirm, start divorce proceedings, but prioritise the house, especially as you have a joint Mortgage on it, you need to look at your options and make a clear decision on how you would like to proceed, even the most plesant of divorces can get side tracked. Currently you are leaving yourself exposed.
Yes to confirm, start divorce proceedings, but prioritise the house, especially as you have a joint Mortgage on it, you need to look at your options and make a clear decision on how you would like to proceed, even the most plesant of divorces can get side tracked. Currently you are leaving yourself exposed.
)
Access:
Please sort this ASAP, a child deserves/needs both parents, but those parents need to hold the childs best interests at heart at all times. Children need boundaries and routine, the access is going to be a life long thing you are going to have to work around, there will be Parents evening, 18th Birthday parties, Graduations and Weddings to name but a few, all these mile stones in your childs life, could endup being tainted, if you don't resolve the access issue. Put you time and energy into facilitating access, even if it drives you mad, I can't tell you the number of times I've bitten my tongue over 15 years, but bite it I do, as it's not just parental access, but there is extended family to consider, which often gives a child a sense of belonging.
Your child may be having difficulty in articulating his feelings, there are a couple of good books out there which may help supprt you all, for children divorce is an emotion the experience a bit like grieving. Try and explore different methods of communicating, writing, drawing model making.
Please sort this ASAP, a child deserves/needs both parents, but those parents need to hold the childs best interests at heart at all times. Children need boundaries and routine, the access is going to be a life long thing you are going to have to work around, there will be Parents evening, 18th Birthday parties, Graduations and Weddings to name but a few, all these mile stones in your childs life, could endup being tainted, if you don't resolve the access issue. Put you time and energy into facilitating access, even if it drives you mad, I can't tell you the number of times I've bitten my tongue over 15 years, but bite it I do, as it's not just parental access, but there is extended family to consider, which often gives a child a sense of belonging.
Your child may be having difficulty in articulating his feelings, there are a couple of good books out there which may help supprt you all, for children divorce is an emotion the experience a bit like grieving. Try and explore different methods of communicating, writing, drawing model making.
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