Ungrateful/Argumentative wife
Discussion
Apologies been at work so unable to respond.
I actually wish I was trolling, would make my life easier.
Valid points about my previous threads, I make a decision then I back out because weirdly on some level despite how toxic she is I do care for her. Not to mind the last time I said I want to divorce she grabbed a knife and attempted to go for her wrists.
I wish it was as easy as just filing for it. She's said she won't leave this house unless it's in a bodybag.
I always (inexplicably) give her the benefit of doubt that she'll change or she'll be fine in a bit but no.
We got back from holiday Sunday and today shes kicked off again about why my siblings don't talk to her or make an effort (my siblings feel awkward with her due to her previous behaviour but she doesn't agree). I said I can't control what other do and then she said you're disloyal to me and always have been.
She said our sex life means nothing because I'm emotionally distant from her, I hand on heart don't know what more I can do.
I may come across as a troll or someone wasting everyone's time, but I am utterly broken. I gave my up so much of my life for her that I can't get back.
I appreciate everyone's input especially the posts that made me chuckle (e92 335d).
I'll try to respond when I can.
I actually wish I was trolling, would make my life easier.
Valid points about my previous threads, I make a decision then I back out because weirdly on some level despite how toxic she is I do care for her. Not to mind the last time I said I want to divorce she grabbed a knife and attempted to go for her wrists.
I wish it was as easy as just filing for it. She's said she won't leave this house unless it's in a bodybag.
I always (inexplicably) give her the benefit of doubt that she'll change or she'll be fine in a bit but no.
We got back from holiday Sunday and today shes kicked off again about why my siblings don't talk to her or make an effort (my siblings feel awkward with her due to her previous behaviour but she doesn't agree). I said I can't control what other do and then she said you're disloyal to me and always have been.
She said our sex life means nothing because I'm emotionally distant from her, I hand on heart don't know what more I can do.
I may come across as a troll or someone wasting everyone's time, but I am utterly broken. I gave my up so much of my life for her that I can't get back.
I appreciate everyone's input especially the posts that made me chuckle (e92 335d).
I'll try to respond when I can.
Just every step of the way she's insulted me or put me down.
She egged me on to buy my dream car (e92/3 M3), I bought one.
Within 2 weeks she asked me to replace the flooring in the house and I said well I've just bought the car so I need to wait a bit.
Response to that: So you have money for a car but not the house.
I've been driven to the brink of insanity with crap like this.
She egged me on to buy my dream car (e92/3 M3), I bought one.
Within 2 weeks she asked me to replace the flooring in the house and I said well I've just bought the car so I need to wait a bit.
Response to that: So you have money for a car but not the house.
I've been driven to the brink of insanity with crap like this.
Couple of observations, gained from your posting history not just this thread.
She has some very deep seated issues, likely BPD. It’s extremely unlikely she can be brought to recognise this and enter therapy. If this is the case, the choice is really yours as to whether you endure the situation, or leave.
Caring for her. Yes it’s classic codependency.
Read up on both. Seek therapy yourself. amongst the first things they’ll tell you is that you’re not responsible for someone else’s actions. The suicide threats are also classic/textbook.
Know yourself, know her, speak to someone, make a conscious decision.
Been there, got out, happier for it.
She has some very deep seated issues, likely BPD. It’s extremely unlikely she can be brought to recognise this and enter therapy. If this is the case, the choice is really yours as to whether you endure the situation, or leave.
Caring for her. Yes it’s classic codependency.
Read up on both. Seek therapy yourself. amongst the first things they’ll tell you is that you’re not responsible for someone else’s actions. The suicide threats are also classic/textbook.
Know yourself, know her, speak to someone, make a conscious decision.
Been there, got out, happier for it.
Jimjimhim said:
TheGreatDane said:
dudleybloke said:
Does she have family nearby so you can drop her off there?
Yes but they are of the same mindset, they'll just say marriage is hard put up with it don't be weak.TheGreatDane said:
Just every step of the way she's insulted me or put me down.
She egged me on to buy my dream car (e92/3 M3), I bought one.
Within 2 weeks she asked me to replace the flooring in the house and I said well I've just bought the car so I need to wait a bit.
Response to that: So you have money for a car but not the house.
I've been driven to the brink of insanity with crap like this.
You will not resolve this without action though.She egged me on to buy my dream car (e92/3 M3), I bought one.
Within 2 weeks she asked me to replace the flooring in the house and I said well I've just bought the car so I need to wait a bit.
Response to that: So you have money for a car but not the house.
I've been driven to the brink of insanity with crap like this.
Either tell her exactly how you feel and suggest therapy. Or file for divorce and separate.
OP, I do think that you are looking at this the wrong way round. This isn’t a negotiation (if you don’t want it to be), you can tell her that it’s over, you can speak to a lawyer, and you can start the divorce process.
You don’t need her agreement for any of that.
And that doesn’t mean you have to be an arse about it, you can tell her politely that it’s over, and explain what you are doing.
You don’t need her agreement for any of that.
And that doesn’t mean you have to be an arse about it, you can tell her politely that it’s over, and explain what you are doing.
TheGreatDane said:
I don't know what to do and was looking for advice from other men who have experienced anything similar?
In your previous threads you have said this. Also multiple times you have said there are things she has done/said that you can’t come back from. Yet here you are, you keep coming back.I would wager that you come home each day and have one hand on the door handle, wondering what’s waiting on the other side.
I have experienced something similar (and also plenty experience with cross cultural relationships). I have given you the advice you need above.
tGassing Station | The Lounge | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff