Ungrateful/Argumentative wife
Discussion
I've been married for 1 year and if you look at my post history it's been a very turbulent year. We argue all the time over the most mundane things and not being biased here, but I never ever start it.
I give it as good as I get because she doesn't stop but I never start, poor form on my part.
I do everything for her from finances, household things and just helping her in life.
Went abroad for our 1 year anniversary which I paid for and on the trip she accused me of being moody when I was quiet for a few mins after a huge meal and in a food coma, said she should have married another ethnicity, accused me of checking out women when I was looking at the sights and asked for the bill midway through a meal as she felt like I wasn't enjoying it.
50% of our holiday was arguing.
I feel broken and trapped, I gave up everything for her and do as much as physically can but I just sit and wait for the next thing to annoy her.
She now wants a baby and I know I'll have to do everything financially and physically for the baby, so I keep saying no.
I don't know what to do and was looking for advice from other men who have experienced anything similar?
I give it as good as I get because she doesn't stop but I never start, poor form on my part.
I do everything for her from finances, household things and just helping her in life.
Went abroad for our 1 year anniversary which I paid for and on the trip she accused me of being moody when I was quiet for a few mins after a huge meal and in a food coma, said she should have married another ethnicity, accused me of checking out women when I was looking at the sights and asked for the bill midway through a meal as she felt like I wasn't enjoying it.
50% of our holiday was arguing.
I feel broken and trapped, I gave up everything for her and do as much as physically can but I just sit and wait for the next thing to annoy her.
She now wants a baby and I know I'll have to do everything financially and physically for the baby, so I keep saying no.
I don't know what to do and was looking for advice from other men who have experienced anything similar?
I don’t think that will get any better. If it’s a communication thing you could go to counselling but it’s likely it’s not going to work and will only get better for a while then worsen.
A child will only make it worse, it never fixes things.
I would be prepared to walk away for both your sakes.
A child will only make it worse, it never fixes things.
I would be prepared to walk away for both your sakes.
Is there a reason not to break up with her tonight and then work towards a divorce later?
And as others have written, don’t risk bringing a child into this. It’s horribly unfair to them, and ties you to their mother for decades.
Edited to add, the way assets are split is dependent on whether the marriage counts as “short”, which I believe yours does. It leaves each with closer to what they brought in than to 50:50 of everything.
https://www.kewlaw.co.uk/helpful-guide/short-marri...
And as others have written, don’t risk bringing a child into this. It’s horribly unfair to them, and ties you to their mother for decades.
Edited to add, the way assets are split is dependent on whether the marriage counts as “short”, which I believe yours does. It leaves each with closer to what they brought in than to 50:50 of everything.
https://www.kewlaw.co.uk/helpful-guide/short-marri...
Edited by Ken_Code on Monday 10th June 21:11
I’ve just read through your previous threads. You didn’t want to get married, and then were looking for a divorce soon after the wedding.
You were given lots of good advice then, and chose to ignore it all, and not bother to update the threads. You don’t seem to have even replied to people who posted there.
Do you actually want advice to help you out, or is this a replay of those?
You were given lots of good advice then, and chose to ignore it all, and not bother to update the threads. You don’t seem to have even replied to people who posted there.
Do you actually want advice to help you out, or is this a replay of those?
Edited by Ken_Code on Monday 10th June 21:30
The answer is easy if you take it logically.
"You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don’t need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don’t need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free"
Seriously though, the advice other posters have given us bang on. You are not happy. You haven't had kids yet. There's still time to get out. Stay and have and kid and you stay forever, or at the very least have a lifetime family and financial tie to her. You only get one shot at life. It might seem hard but it's infinitely harder a few years down the line.
"You just slip out the back, Jack
Make a new plan, Stan
You don’t need to be coy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Hop on the bus, Gus
You don’t need to discuss much
Just drop off the key, Lee
And get yourself free"
Seriously though, the advice other posters have given us bang on. You are not happy. You haven't had kids yet. There's still time to get out. Stay and have and kid and you stay forever, or at the very least have a lifetime family and financial tie to her. You only get one shot at life. It might seem hard but it's infinitely harder a few years down the line.
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