Am I Being Too Sensitive Here?
Discussion
Sitting on the couch this morning with my old (14) springer spaniel snuggled down sound asleep beside me, when, from his little doggy bumholio I heard a long "pffffffffffffffffffft. "
Now, we all know dog farts can be bad.
We all know old dog farts can be particularly bad.
But ……
Well, just but.
It was a bad one. A special one. A memorable one. The sort of fart that compels those who smelled it to share the experience on social media and open threads on forums to discuss.
I'm 55 have owned and been around a lot of dogs and, as such, had the misfortune to smell a lot of dog farts and caught the odour of the occasional nasty poo as I've bagged it up. (you know, the sort of poo that you remember once back from the walk and ask your wife "what the fk did you feed that dog today?" ). So, when I say this release of gas was exceptional I know what I'm talking about.
What pained me in particular wasn't being subject to the sniff of the whiff. It was my little live Porton Down's reaction to the friendly fire of his own WMD.
Still sound asleep his nose began to twitch. He awoke with a start, sneezed twice then gave me the filthiest look a dog could give a man before jumping off the settee flouncing off to the furthest corner of the room, sighing, giving me a second most filthy look before flopping on the floor and falling asleep again.
That bd dog thought it was me.
I'm upset at the injustice of it all. Support me.
Now, we all know dog farts can be bad.
We all know old dog farts can be particularly bad.
But ……
Well, just but.
It was a bad one. A special one. A memorable one. The sort of fart that compels those who smelled it to share the experience on social media and open threads on forums to discuss.
I'm 55 have owned and been around a lot of dogs and, as such, had the misfortune to smell a lot of dog farts and caught the odour of the occasional nasty poo as I've bagged it up. (you know, the sort of poo that you remember once back from the walk and ask your wife "what the fk did you feed that dog today?" ). So, when I say this release of gas was exceptional I know what I'm talking about.
What pained me in particular wasn't being subject to the sniff of the whiff. It was my little live Porton Down's reaction to the friendly fire of his own WMD.
Still sound asleep his nose began to twitch. He awoke with a start, sneezed twice then gave me the filthiest look a dog could give a man before jumping off the settee flouncing off to the furthest corner of the room, sighing, giving me a second most filthy look before flopping on the floor and falling asleep again.
That bd dog thought it was me.
I'm upset at the injustice of it all. Support me.
Its always worth remembering that although he is your best friend, you aren't necessarily his best friend. You may just be the most convenient person for him to bully and generally make look stupid. Do you honestly think he's going to take responsibility and risk getting in trouble with your wife?
I posted this on the late lamented Appalling Flatulence thread a few years back...
A few years back my mums council terrier (Staff X) was lounging in front of the fire when the she (the dog, not my mum) farted.
Now normally a dog fart is a quiet pffft but for whatever dietary reasons this canine fart was more of a PAARRPP!
The dog was less than impressed with this unexpected vibrato from her chocolate starfish so turned, teeth bared to attack whatever it was that was assaulting her teatowel holder.
Unfortunately the turning and twisting compressed her intestines further which provoked a window rattling PAARRPP!
The dog jumped up and ran in terror from her own fart, returning shortly after for sympathy and cuddles but we were too busy laughing to assist the dog in regaining her composure.
A few years back my mums council terrier (Staff X) was lounging in front of the fire when the she (the dog, not my mum) farted.
Now normally a dog fart is a quiet pffft but for whatever dietary reasons this canine fart was more of a PAARRPP!
The dog was less than impressed with this unexpected vibrato from her chocolate starfish so turned, teeth bared to attack whatever it was that was assaulting her teatowel holder.
Unfortunately the turning and twisting compressed her intestines further which provoked a window rattling PAARRPP!
The dog jumped up and ran in terror from her own fart, returning shortly after for sympathy and cuddles but we were too busy laughing to assist the dog in regaining her composure.
At least there was the audible warning, my dog deals in stealth WMD's!
Except, one funny story the other night. Towser (my dog) very occasionally wakes me up in the night to go out which he did a few nights ago but there was something different this time. He scratched my arm, I put the light on, he looked into my eyes & I could instantly tell this was a severity 1. He legged it to each door between us & the garden, frantically scratching at each one.
When he got outside he just about made it to the lawn &, lets just say, I probably should have gone round to the neighbours the next day to apologise for waking them up! It was so loud & long & I swear the force moved him forward a foot!
Except, one funny story the other night. Towser (my dog) very occasionally wakes me up in the night to go out which he did a few nights ago but there was something different this time. He scratched my arm, I put the light on, he looked into my eyes & I could instantly tell this was a severity 1. He legged it to each door between us & the garden, frantically scratching at each one.
When he got outside he just about made it to the lawn &, lets just say, I probably should have gone round to the neighbours the next day to apologise for waking them up! It was so loud & long & I swear the force moved him forward a foot!
GliderRider said:
Its always worth remembering that although he is your best friend, you aren't necessarily his best friend. You may just be the most convenient person for him to bully and generally make look stupid. Do you honestly think he's going to take responsibility and risk getting in trouble with your wife?
it's a dog we're talking about not a cat! That aside thanks to the OP and others for the genuine laughs regarding canine combustions still laughing now, our old dog tia, long haired chihuahua, used to parp and then scoot forward like she had been rocket propelled, small dog, but my god, the noise and smell!! but not as funny as how she used to drag her bagpuss toy(bigger than her by the way) into the lounge when ever we had friends/family around and start to hump it to death, then shake it and toss across the room. people couldn't get their head round she wasnt a he!
rip god love her
rip god love her
Mexican cuties said:
still laughing now, our old dog tia, long haired chihuahua, used to parp and then scoot forward like she had been rocket propelled, small dog, but my god, the noise and smell!! but not as funny as how she used to drag her bagpuss toy(bigger than her by the way) into the lounge when ever we had friends/family around and start to hump it to death, then shake it and toss across the room. people couldn't get their head round she wasnt a he!
rip god love her
paw) rip god love her
Years ago I owned a female Border Collie, who had a best mate ( although he was under her paw) Staffie. It was too obvious that she fancied him as although he never "tried it on" she got fed up and one night grabbed him and humped him. I don't know what she had in mind, perhaps she thought he might just get the idea. Then there's my first rescue after retirement. An old large Cairn . We bought him a bed , cushion on outside with a pillow over a sheet. At first he just humped it. Then he made a hole in the bottom sheet and would run round the house "wearing" his bed. An to those that thing desexing works - at this stage he was 12 years old and had been parted with his bits since he was six month old.
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