CATS! How to keep the furry gits from crapping in my garden?
Discussion
This afternoon I ruined a tatty but perfectly serviceable pair of work boots whilst pottering around in the back garden.
The cause? A large, stinking feline turd, which had been lurking in the grass like a land mine. (At least, all the evidence points toward a local cat, as the garden's completely enclosed, we don't own a dog - nor indeed a cat, for that matter - and all of the humans in our household are fully toilet trained. Yes, even yours truly.)
Judging by the quantity, consistency and overpowering stench of the aforementioned item, the cat that laid it weighs 3 stone and lives on a diet of mackerel vindaloo. On further inspection it transpires that three more such piles of fecal matter lie on my lawn, awaiting the landing of an unfortunate foot.
With the above in mind, I feel that now is the time to wage war on the furry little c
s.
By way of a preliminary assault, I've ordered a couple of ultrasonic cat scarers off Amazon. Time will tell if they're effective, or if they're merely a means of draining the life out of perfectly good AA batteries. Also, as our back garden is enclosed by a 6' wooden fence, I'm going to screw some 3" vine eyes at intervals along the top of said fence, and string a length of twine through them - the theory being that the taut twine will be highly uncomfortable under their paws, prevent them getting a decent foothold atop the fence, and ultimately stop the buggers from climbing over.
Question is, should the above fail, what next?
I quite like the idea of capturing one of the perpetrators, somehow ascertaining the address of its owner, breaking into their abode and leaving a large, steaming pile of my own dung on their carpet. Or their sofa, or bed, or in their fridge. However this may not be realistic, as not every cat owner puts a collar with address label on their pet; also, cats are generally rather quick, whereas I am a bit podgy and sluggish. Furthermore, I am regretfully lacking in access to a flamethrower (boooo), a machine gun (double boooo) or any kind of guided missile technology (extra boooo with knobs on). And I'm told by the mrs that trapping cats is, in these modern times, somewhat frowned upon - as is nailing them to the fence posts as a warning to their mates.
So, with these rather irksome limitations in mind, have any of you fine folk discovered an effective method of deterring the flea-ridden little ste factories from using one's lawn as a latrine?
The cause? A large, stinking feline turd, which had been lurking in the grass like a land mine. (At least, all the evidence points toward a local cat, as the garden's completely enclosed, we don't own a dog - nor indeed a cat, for that matter - and all of the humans in our household are fully toilet trained. Yes, even yours truly.)
Judging by the quantity, consistency and overpowering stench of the aforementioned item, the cat that laid it weighs 3 stone and lives on a diet of mackerel vindaloo. On further inspection it transpires that three more such piles of fecal matter lie on my lawn, awaiting the landing of an unfortunate foot.
With the above in mind, I feel that now is the time to wage war on the furry little c
s. By way of a preliminary assault, I've ordered a couple of ultrasonic cat scarers off Amazon. Time will tell if they're effective, or if they're merely a means of draining the life out of perfectly good AA batteries. Also, as our back garden is enclosed by a 6' wooden fence, I'm going to screw some 3" vine eyes at intervals along the top of said fence, and string a length of twine through them - the theory being that the taut twine will be highly uncomfortable under their paws, prevent them getting a decent foothold atop the fence, and ultimately stop the buggers from climbing over.
Question is, should the above fail, what next?
I quite like the idea of capturing one of the perpetrators, somehow ascertaining the address of its owner, breaking into their abode and leaving a large, steaming pile of my own dung on their carpet. Or their sofa, or bed, or in their fridge. However this may not be realistic, as not every cat owner puts a collar with address label on their pet; also, cats are generally rather quick, whereas I am a bit podgy and sluggish. Furthermore, I am regretfully lacking in access to a flamethrower (boooo), a machine gun (double boooo) or any kind of guided missile technology (extra boooo with knobs on). And I'm told by the mrs that trapping cats is, in these modern times, somewhat frowned upon - as is nailing them to the fence posts as a warning to their mates.
So, with these rather irksome limitations in mind, have any of you fine folk discovered an effective method of deterring the flea-ridden little s
te factories from using one's lawn as a latrine? Andrew_S said:
It's probably a fox.
Not saying that cats do not do this but fox poo has a genuinely awful smell that is very 'sharp' and distinctive. I think cat poo will also fill about 5-7cm sq max on average, fox poo is generally a larger amount.
Get a webcam with infra red and motion (geddit!) sensors and see if you have some wildlife or thatdamngreythingfromnextdoor taking advantage of your good nature.
wilwak said:
Cats usually try to bury their doings in soil or gravel.
Foxes can jump fences and lay foul sticking turds on grass much like dogs do.
We have Foxes come and dump in our back garden. No idea how they get in but our cctv has filmed them doing their business.
Fox's climb, they'll scale a 6' fence like it's not there. Foxes can jump fences and lay foul sticking turds on grass much like dogs do.
We have Foxes come and dump in our back garden. No idea how they get in but our cctv has filmed them doing their business.
My money's on a fox too. Cats tend to prefer dirt, sand or gravel.
The only way to keep cats out of your garden is to get............ a cat. It's a feline conspiracy, I'm afraid.
Edit. Just noticed that a previous poster gave the same advice. Great minds, and all that.
The only way to keep cats out of your garden is to get............ a cat. It's a feline conspiracy, I'm afraid.
Edit. Just noticed that a previous poster gave the same advice. Great minds, and all that.
Edited by Mort7 on Monday 4th February 17:59
Which won't work if it's a fox, which it probably is. This might help:-
https://www.wildlifetrusts.org/wildlife/how-identi...
Or you can have a game of spot the poo.
https://www.rspb.org.uk/fun-and-learning/for-famil...
https://www.wildlifetrusts.org/wildlife/how-identi...
Or you can have a game of spot the poo.
https://www.rspb.org.uk/fun-and-learning/for-famil...
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