Swan problem!

[PoleDriver]

My daughter has a problem. She is at work and has popped out to have a ciggie. Her ciggies are in the car and there is a swan sat on the car roof!!
She does not want to hurt the swan and she doesn't want the swan to hurt her!

Any ideas?

[Pothole]

Why should the swan hurt her? Women are stupid sometimes, eh?

[randlemarcus]

Get a ciggie from somewhere else, and worry about the car later.

[Magog]

This thread is worthless without pics...

[PoleDriver]

Pothole said:

Why should the swan hurt her? Women are stupid sometimes, eh?

Long muscular neck plus sharp beak = pain!

[PoleDriver]

randlemarcus said:

Get a ciggie from somewhere else, and worry about the car later.

There are no shops open where she works and there are no other people there either!

[PoleDriver]

Magog said:

This thread is worthless without pics...

Her phone camera is not working due to a phone/coffee interface!

[Zaxxon]

PoleDriver said:

Long muscular neck plus sharp beak = pain!

What about the swan?

[Pothole]

PoleDriver said:

Pothole said:

Why should the swan hurt her? Women are stupid sometimes, eh?

Long muscular neck plus sharp beak = pain!

if it doesn't just fly off. Ridiculous fuss about nothing imho.

[PoleDriver]

Pothole said:

PoleDriver said:

Pothole said:

Why should the swan hurt her? Women are stupid sometimes, eh?

Long muscular neck plus sharp beak = pain!

if it doesn't just fly off. Ridiculous fuss about nothing imho.

That's what I told her, but she's my daughter and I need to try and come up with something!

[Pothole]

run towards it making a loud noise and flapping your arms as if you're trying to fly. It will leave.

[PoleDriver]

YAY! Lateral thinking, and a packet of mini cheddars did the trick!

[thinfourth2]

How the fook did a swan get on a car roof??

They aren't exactly precision flyers

[PoleDriver]

Pass! They can do a fairly precision landing, but that must have taken some effort!

[DJFish]

Has anyone ever actually had their arm broken by a swan?

[PoleDriver]

DJFish said:

Has anyone ever actually had their arm broken by a swan?

Nothing useful on SNOPES but there is This from the Grauniad!

[Pothole]

Absolute nonsense. An urban myth of immense and preposterous proportions.

[Sam_68]

Pothole said:

Absolute nonsense. An urban myth of immense and preposterous proportions.

I wouldn't be so sure.

I have been with someone when they had a couple of ribs busted by a mute swan.

Location was here (Methley Ings, near Leeds).

There is a track that forms a 'causeway' separating two sides of a lagoon. We inadvertently walked across between the swan and its nest. It took exception to this and flew at us at low level across the lake, hitting my friend in the chest, breaking two ribs. Had he been positioned slightly differently, I would have no doubt that the bird could have broken his arm.

[Pothole]

Sam_68 said:

Pothole said:

Absolute nonsense. An urban myth of immense and preposterous proportions.

I wouldn't be so sure.

I have been with someone when they had a couple of ribs busted by a mute swan.

Location was here (Methley Ings, near Leeds).

There is a track that forms a 'causeway' separating two sides of a lagoon. We inadvertently walked across between the swan and its nest. It took exception to this and flew at us at low level across the lake, hitting my friend in the chest, breaking two ribs. Had he been positioned slightly differently, I would have no doubt that the bird could have broken his arm.

It flew into him at speed and cracked a couple of ribs, it did not break his arm with its wing, did it?

I don't believe that even if you live to be 153 you will ever be able to bring me unimpeachable evidence that anyone has ever had their arm BROKEN by a swan's wing.

[Sam_68]

Pothole said:

It flew into him at speed and cracked a couple of ribs, it did not break his arm with its wing, did it?

I don't believe anyone specified that it had to walk up to someone and karate chop them... the question was whether anyone had ever had their arm broken by a swan. Method of attack wasn't mentioned.

I have first hand evidence that swans can be very agressive when nesting and that they are capable of delivering enough force to break bones.

You're welcome to your view, but my view - based on first hand and personal experience - is that you are unwise to suggest that the possibility of such injury is 'immense and preposterous nonsense'.