Upsetting the neighbour
Discussion
It's been a stressful week or so in Chez Manson with my wife suffering some complications during her pregnancy which put her in hospital for a day last week. She got home at 6pm on Wednesday having been poked, prodded and jabbed full of steriods, then at 9:30pm announced that she thought she should go back as she was having contractions (false alarm - think the little bugger was getting his own back for being poked and prodded all day). Anyway they kept her in overnight and most of Thursday for more tests.
Anyway over the last couple of weeks I've been working on getting the nursery resembling some sort of order which involved removing a build in wardrobe, repairing the patch of blown plaster behind it and then general decorating.
I've been doing this at weekends and the odd bit a couple of evenings a week but had been making sure I was doing quiet bits in the evening (eg. no sanding with the electric sander) although one night last week I did have that on to quickly rub the woodwork down/flatten the wall (30mins max).
Over the weekend, I fitted two shelves to the wall and the new curtain pole and then on Tuesday morning the carpet fitters put in the new carpet.
Fast forward to last night - I got home from work, had some dinner and went upstairs to fix the LCD bracket to the wall (4 x 7mm holes) and three small pictures (3 x 4mm holes).
I was just finishing drilling the last hole at 8:30 when Amy came in to say she was pulling the curtains upstairs and the next door neighbour was tapping on the window downstairs. Decided to ignore her as I had finished drilling and if she wanted to stand around outside getting wet banging on our window (while standing on our flowerbed, instead of ringing the doorbell like any normal person would) that was her perogative.
Anyway the phone then rang, knowing it would be her, Amy answered and got the usual b
x about why couldn't we have done this work while she was away last week, how it was "stressing" her out and it shouldn't take this long to do DIY (we've been working on the house on and [mostly] off for the last two years). She then told Amy that she was putting her house on the market... yada yada.
In my defence, it's was 7 small holes, drilled within a 45min period and finished just before 8:30. I would have done it on Monday but a) my Nan passed away on Monday and b) some of the bits hadn't arrived and c) this is only the 2nd time I've had a power tool on after 8:00pm in the last two years.
Am I being unreasonable? we'll end up getting bad mouthed to the other neighbours and she has hardly spoken to us since her husband died last year. At all times we've been civil and tried to accomadate her while decorating but sometimes you have to make noise! I've made numerous offers to take her shopping/cut her lawn but they've all been turned down. If we go out into our back garden and she is in her's she goes inside instead of talking to us and has openly ignored my wife but just walking straight past her.
Sorry for the rant - was just clearing my head a bit!
Anyway over the last couple of weeks I've been working on getting the nursery resembling some sort of order which involved removing a build in wardrobe, repairing the patch of blown plaster behind it and then general decorating.
I've been doing this at weekends and the odd bit a couple of evenings a week but had been making sure I was doing quiet bits in the evening (eg. no sanding with the electric sander) although one night last week I did have that on to quickly rub the woodwork down/flatten the wall (30mins max).
Over the weekend, I fitted two shelves to the wall and the new curtain pole and then on Tuesday morning the carpet fitters put in the new carpet.
Fast forward to last night - I got home from work, had some dinner and went upstairs to fix the LCD bracket to the wall (4 x 7mm holes) and three small pictures (3 x 4mm holes).
I was just finishing drilling the last hole at 8:30 when Amy came in to say she was pulling the curtains upstairs and the next door neighbour was tapping on the window downstairs. Decided to ignore her as I had finished drilling and if she wanted to stand around outside getting wet banging on our window (while standing on our flowerbed, instead of ringing the doorbell like any normal person would) that was her perogative.
Anyway the phone then rang, knowing it would be her, Amy answered and got the usual b
x about why couldn't we have done this work while she was away last week, how it was "stressing" her out and it shouldn't take this long to do DIY (we've been working on the house on and [mostly] off for the last two years). She then told Amy that she was putting her house on the market... yada yada. In my defence, it's was 7 small holes, drilled within a 45min period and finished just before 8:30. I would have done it on Monday but a) my Nan passed away on Monday and b) some of the bits hadn't arrived and c) this is only the 2nd time I've had a power tool on after 8:00pm in the last two years.
Am I being unreasonable? we'll end up getting bad mouthed to the other neighbours and she has hardly spoken to us since her husband died last year. At all times we've been civil and tried to accomadate her while decorating but sometimes you have to make noise! I've made numerous offers to take her shopping/cut her lawn but they've all been turned down. If we go out into our back garden and she is in her's she goes inside instead of talking to us and has openly ignored my wife but just walking straight past her.
Sorry for the rant - was just clearing my head a bit!
Ignore her, she sounds like a stupid uppity uptight bint. Sounds like you have been extending the olive branch and she is too stuck up to accept your peace offerings.
If she makes an official complaint about your "noise" then she would have to declare it when moving house so she'd be shooting herself in the foot.
If she makes an official complaint about your "noise" then she would have to declare it when moving house so she'd be shooting herself in the foot.
Life is too short!!
I guess it's a semi? (apols if not)
It sounds similar, in part, before our first born arrived, I was decorating like mad, to ensure his room and the spare room were finished. Blown plaster patched, painted, new carpets, radiators moved and a new one inserted.. Quite a few niggly jobs.
Now of course he delights in stripping off parts of the border we put on... <arghh!>
If it were me I'd just apologise, explain things as calmly as possible and leave it at that, you can't do any more. It's not worth intensifying and once Manson jr. arrives you won't have time to worry about all of that anyway!!
I guess it's a semi? (apols if not)
It sounds similar, in part, before our first born arrived, I was decorating like mad, to ensure his room and the spare room were finished. Blown plaster patched, painted, new carpets, radiators moved and a new one inserted.. Quite a few niggly jobs.
Now of course he delights in stripping off parts of the border we put on... <arghh!>
If it were me I'd just apologise, explain things as calmly as possible and leave it at that, you can't do any more. It's not worth intensifying and once Manson jr. arrives you won't have time to worry about all of that anyway!!
Coco H said:
She's probably not got over her husband dying. Small things may make her irrational/upset more so than usual.
If you're finished now I just wouldn't worry about it. Be nice when you see her and get on with life.
Yeah I think your right, Fred was still around the last time she came round to ask us to keep the noise down. Again around 8:30 but I was sanding down some polyfilla in the lounge (joining wall).If you're finished now I just wouldn't worry about it. Be nice when you see her and get on with life.
She's Italian and when Fred died she was very strong and threw herself into organising his affairs etc so I don't think him passing really hit until her until 3/4 months after. Any offers of help were politely declined as she wanted to be strong.
The problem is she now keeps buring bridges (with us at least)...
Don't think it will ever get as far as an official complaint (there's no grounds for one to start with). It just winds me up that we're flexible and as she's always home at whatever time/day of the week we do work we'll be affecting her!
eps said:
Life is too short!!
I guess it's a semi? (apols if not)
It sounds similar, in part, before our first born arrived, I was decorating like mad, to ensure his room and the spare room were finished. Blown plaster patched, painted, new carpets, radiators moved and a new one inserted.. Quite a few niggly jobs.
Now of course he delights in stripping off parts of the border we put on... <arghh!>
If it were me I'd just apologise, explain things as calmly as possible and leave it at that, you can't do any more. It's not worth intensifying and once Manson jr. arrives you won't have time to worry about all of that anyway!!
It's an end of terrace. I guess it's a semi? (apols if not)
It sounds similar, in part, before our first born arrived, I was decorating like mad, to ensure his room and the spare room were finished. Blown plaster patched, painted, new carpets, radiators moved and a new one inserted.. Quite a few niggly jobs.
Now of course he delights in stripping off parts of the border we put on... <arghh!>
If it were me I'd just apologise, explain things as calmly as possible and leave it at that, you can't do any more. It's not worth intensifying and once Manson jr. arrives you won't have time to worry about all of that anyway!!
I've got a border to fit at some point but apart from taking out the double bed/setting up the cot/waiting for the new wardrobe to be delivered we're all ready to go.
My childish side nearly came out and I was tempted to download some crap song and leave it playing on repeat at full volume this morning, but decided to take the grown up approach
ignore her.
i do far far worse thatn you do, but pointed out to my neighbours that i only work to what the law allows and i'm doing it to improve the house, not the piss them off [it was a boarded up wreck to start with]. one set of neighbours are fine with it but the other house is rented and the tenants like to think i give a st about their griping.
i do far far worse thatn you do, but pointed out to my neighbours that i only work to what the law allows and i'm doing it to improve the house, not the piss them off [it was a boarded up wreck to start with]. one set of neighbours are fine with it but the other house is rented and the tenants like to think i give a s
t about their griping. EP2Nick said:
2 years of one and off drilling, banging, sanding.
Sorry, but I'd want to move away from you..
As time (and money) allows we've been updating the house...Sorry, but I'd want to move away from you..
There have been significant amounts of time when we have been saving waiting to do the next part of the house. It has not been two constant years of work.
Since June 2007 we've brought the house, got married (July 2008) and done significant amount of work on the house (most of downstairs has been replastered (July 08)).
We did a lot of work last summer (plastering, painting, kitchen floor) then didn't do any more work until June this year when I fitted the new woodwork in the kitchen/lounge and painted it all before the carpet was laid.
Since then I fitted a laminate floor in the porch (1m x 1m) and have decorated one other room (the spare room/nursery).
Don't think that's unreasonable at all.
Prob not unreasonable but would still do my head in! I've never not lived in a detached and can only imagine it's staggeringly annoying to be sat down to watch TV in the evening and have someone start drilling in the wall of your room.
I'd also expect a 30 min job seems a lot less annoying to her if its done over the weekend during the day rather than at 8pm when most people are trying to relax with a cuppa and some telly.
I'd also expect a 30 min job seems a lot less annoying to her if its done over the weekend during the day rather than at 8pm when most people are trying to relax with a cuppa and some telly.
Tiggsy said:
Prob not unreasonable but would still do my head in! I've never not lived in a detached and can only imagine it's staggeringly annoying to be sat down to watch TV in the evening and have someone start drilling in the wall of your room.
I'd also expect a 30 min job seems a lot less annoying to her if its done over the weekend during the day rather than at 8pm when most people are trying to relax with a cuppa and some telly.
thisI'd also expect a 30 min job seems a lot less annoying to her if its done over the weekend during the day rather than at 8pm when most people are trying to relax with a cuppa and some telly.
you could have nipped round and explained to her beforehand "I'm just drilling a couple of holes for the baby's room yadda yadda.."
Surprised at some of the replies here, but perhaps should expect it with the state that Britain is in.
You have to live next to your neighbour - so only you can decide whether it is a problem. We have a neighbour with a large garden and an affection for JCB's. Don't mind once in a while, but when every nice Sunday there is something like that roaring it gets irritating.
Perhaps your neighbour was expecting some peace and quiet, yet suddenly gets noise. She does not know you were only drilling a few holes.
Perhaps to put relations right (if you are bothered) a bottle of wine or something similar?
You have to live next to your neighbour - so only you can decide whether it is a problem. We have a neighbour with a large garden and an affection for JCB's. Don't mind once in a while, but when every nice Sunday there is something like that roaring it gets irritating.
Perhaps your neighbour was expecting some peace and quiet, yet suddenly gets noise. She does not know you were only drilling a few holes.
Perhaps to put relations right (if you are bothered) a bottle of wine or something similar?
Fittster said:
You don't appear to have shown any consideration for your neighbour so you can't expect them to be happy.
We have shown her plenty of consideration - I try and keep any noise to a minimum and normally at the weekend. I would have finished the jobs I did last night on Monday if my Nan hadn't passed away. It needed to be done before Saturday as my parents are coming to stay.
If I had gone round to tell her that I would be drilling seven small holes I doubt she would have answered the door.
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