Be prepared!

[Dr Jekyll]

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/sci/tech/8206280.stm

[RS Jim]

Hmmm better get the shotgun.

[Jasandjules]

Hmm, isn't there a Frankie Boyle joke about scientists having too much time on their hands?!?!?
Seems like he was right.

[DSM2]

"If zombies actually existed, an attack by them would lead to the collapse of civilisation unless dealt with quickly and aggressively."

FFS! If a death ray existed I would be using it, on the fking wasters who come up with this crap, right now....................

[DangerousMike]

scientists need time on their hands to come up with ideas. thinking takes time? what else should we be doing with our time?

[Halb]

Silly scientists, they are put up to it by the socialist/bbc/lefty/liberal lot, next they will be saying bees can't fly.

[Digga]

DSM2 said:

"If zombies actually existed...

Might it also be possible for live, winged monkeys to fly out of my arse?

[Einion Yrth]

Article said:

Professor Robert Smith? (the question mark is part of his surname and not a typographical mistake)

Pretentious loon alert!

[FourWheelDrift]

Halb said:

Silly scientists, they are put up to it by the socialist/bbc/lefty/liberal lot, next they will be saying bees can't fly.

Or dogs can't look up.

[AshVX220]

Halb said:

Silly scientists, they are put up to it by the socialist/bbc/lefty/liberal lot, next they will be saying bees can't fly.

If you ask the right questions during a study, you can come up with any conclusion you want.

[FourWheelDrift]

AshVX220 said:

If you ask the right questions during a study, you can come up with any conclusion you want.

And example of such from a recent repeat of Yes, Prime Minister

[Sir Humphrey demonstrates how public surveys can reach opposite conclusions]
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Mr. Woolley, are you worried about the rise in crime among teenagers?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think there is lack of discipline and vigorous training in our Comprehensive Schools?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think young people welcome some structure and leadership in their lives?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do they respond to a challenge?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Might you be in favour of reintroducing National Service?
Bernard Woolley: Er, I might be.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Yes or no?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Of course, after all you've said you can't say no to that. On the other hand, the surveys can reach opposite conclusions.
[survey two]
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Mr. Woolley, are you worried about the danger of war?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Are you unhappy about the growth of armaments?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think there's a danger in giving young people guns and teaching them how to kill?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Do you think it's wrong to force people to take arms against their will?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
Sir Humphrey Appleby: Would you oppose the reintroduction of conscription?
Bernard Woolley: Yes.
[does a double-take]
Sir Humphrey Appleby: There you are, Bernard. The perfectly balanced sample.

[telecat]

As the report says they used the "Zombie" scenario as a way off finding out how disease that is spread by contact could be combated. In this case they found that swift, decisive action is the best route to take.

[FourWheelDrift]

Avian Flu, Swine Flu, next Zombies.

I can see Gordon Brown planning the out-break now, anticipated casualty numbers. A planned introduction of a vaccine at a later date which mysteriously causes side-effects in children to keep everyone scared and their minds of the atrocious government of the country and general wall pissing of taxes.

[G_T]

I think the question that needs answering is whether or not this is more dangerous than eating processed ham.

[350GT]

People.. It was a mathematical exercise. It's not as if they all dressed up as zombies, and went on a rampage, and saw how quickly they were killed. This is crud dressed up as news.

[DangerousMike]

by the way at work today I was investigating what shape balloons are best for making people's hair stand on end. you were paying for it. I love my job.

[grumbledoak]

DangerousMike said:

by the way at work today I was investigating what shape balloons are best for making people's hair stand on end.

That doesn't sound very dangerous.

[Cpn Jack Spanner]

Digga said:

DSM2 said:

"If zombies actually existed...

Might it also be possible for live, winged monkeys to fly out of my arse?

I had that a few weeks back... well, it felt like winged monkeys

Oh, and they actually smell bad too.