Food for depression

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Discussion

ChevronB19

Original Poster:

6,758 posts

173 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
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Mods - hope you don’t mind, but I *think* this is more appropriate for the food aspect, but if you feel the need to move to Health, then so be it.

Have a friend who is severely depressed.

She’s getting support from me and others, including her family and NHS, and as far as I can see, the care is good.

However, she isn’t eating. The best she will do is some hot buttered toast before she goes to bed (continual sleeping and hiding from the world is a symptom of her condition).

What can we do to interest her in food? We’ve tried the food replacement stuff (the proper stuff the nhs uses) - she doesn’t like them. Having tried them myself, I understand where she’s coming from in that respect.

Have tried delivering home cooked ‘ready’ meals, including staying with her, heating them up and giving her them on a plate. No joy. She can eat a couple of forkfuls, and that’s it. We are managing to get multivitamins down her (just, she gags at swallowing anything) but due to the lack of any ‘substance’ the vitamins are causing some, shall we say, ‘digestive’ issues.

Psychologically, she doesn’t think she’s ‘fat’, has no issues with people being ‘fat’, there is no history of an eating disorder in her teens (she’s 51), no examples of binge eating/bulimia. She just says every single food she tries ‘tastes of ash’.

Going to try poached eggs on toast next, but any other tips welcome.

And for purely PH purposes to preempt the inevitable, I’m happily married, she’s a good buddy who has stuck with me when I’ve been through hard times.

ETA: I should add we’ve done all the googling, professional advice etc., we’re now down to looking for personal experience - be reassured we are also doing all the ‘proper stuff’.

Edited by ChevronB19 on Tuesday 23 May 12:08

DaveTheRave87

2,141 posts

99 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
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When I was at my worst point I got up 1 day, went to the shops and bought the ingredients for a cheeseburger. I burnt the onions badly but the simple act of making it gave me a sense of achievement and made me feel better.

Maybe get your friend into cooking, rather than the food itself.

bolidemichael

15,706 posts

211 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
quotequote all
This is a very good book which breaks down the mineral and nutritional properties of natural foodstuffs

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Neals-Yard-Remedies-Heali...

It also suggest meals for 'a day of positive mood' amongst others. Staying well hydrated with a natural mineral water, particularly rich in magnesium >60mg/L will benefit brain function. Additionally, avoiding the highs and lows of sugar and caffeine may be beneficial to moderation of mood.

cookie1600

2,206 posts

171 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
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A jacket potato of appropriate size with lashings of butter and cheese then work up from there.

sherman

14,040 posts

225 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
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A plate of macaroni cheese always brings back happy childhood memories.

Try her on turkey dinosaurs, waffles and beans for instance.
Happy food.

simon_harris

1,917 posts

44 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
quotequote all
if you are just trying to get calories in why not try some of the meal replacement drinks like yfood etc?

that might stimulate appetite and make proper food more appealing

dudleybloke

20,553 posts

196 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
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Steak and eggs with cheesecake for dessert.

pork911

7,365 posts

193 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
quotequote all
ChevronB19 said:
(continual sleeping and hiding from the world is a symptom of her condition).
obviously itself an issue and of course a vicious circle but appetite for anything unlikely to come without some and increasing activity and exercise

Mr Roper

13,325 posts

204 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
quotequote all
Pancakes with sugar and lemon.

SlimJim16v

6,278 posts

153 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
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Mr Roper said:
Pancakes with sugar and lemon.
Yes, try cakes, chocolate eclairs, brownies etc. Not healthy but will get some calories in. Even chocolate bars, protein bars etc.

bolidemichael

15,706 posts

211 months

Tuesday 23rd May 2023
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I strongly disagree with the advice for empty calories that will create sugar spikes and crashes.

Mobile Chicane

21,398 posts

222 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
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I disagree with the advice re: 'stodge'.

Scientists are beginning to understand more about the relationship between gut biodiversity and mental health / overall wellbeing, and the advice is - surprise, surprise - more fruits and veggies.

I'd suggest getting in a stock of the ready-made mini salad / fruit pots that all supermarkets sell nowadays. Waitrose and M&S have some good ones.

I get where she's coming from in terms of 'food tastes like ash'. I've had COVID and everything tasted of soap for a while after. I used to quite like bitter flavours, but that's gone completely.

The odd glass of wine might stimulate the appetite.

HTH


simon_harris

1,917 posts

44 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
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The real obvious answer is 8-10 pints of stella which will immediately trigger desire for a greasy kebab.

Collectingbrass

2,448 posts

205 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
quotequote all
I had the same when my wife (now ex) was going through similar following undiagnosed Post Natal Depression. Sorry to put a downer on it but I found there wasn't much I could do, you can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink. I also know from my own low spells that appetite is one of the first things to go and eating sensibly the second.

All you can do is make sure there is food available and try and make sure it has some nutritional value. If you're able to join her for medical appointments with people prescribing any medication she is on, as a friend and note taker (worth noting that some people really need this) it would be worth tactfully raising this in those sessions.

Gone a bit AMG

7,060 posts

207 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
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Tom Kerridge has released a dopamine cookbook a while ago, that’s a good start for ideas.

markiii

3,966 posts

204 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
quotequote all
bolidemichael said:
This is a very good book which breaks down the mineral and nutritional properties of natural foodstuffs

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Neals-Yard-Remedies-Heali...

It also suggest meals for 'a day of positive mood' amongst others. Staying well hydrated with a natural mineral water, particularly rich in magnesium >60mg/L will benefit brain function. Additionally, avoiding the highs and lows of sugar and caffeine may be beneficial to moderation of mood.
can;t reccomend magnesium enough, if you can get her on some magnesium supplements

bolidemichael

15,706 posts

211 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
quotequote all
markiii said:
bolidemichael said:
This is a very good book which breaks down the mineral and nutritional properties of natural foodstuffs

https://www.amazon.co.uk/Neals-Yard-Remedies-Heali...

It also suggest meals for 'a day of positive mood' amongst others. Staying well hydrated with a natural mineral water, particularly rich in magnesium >60mg/L will benefit brain function. Additionally, avoiding the highs and lows of sugar and caffeine may be beneficial to moderation of mood.
can;t reccomend magnesium enough, if you can get her on some magnesium supplements
The reason that I recommended natural mineral water rich in magnesium is that it doubles up as hydration and is also more easily absorbed by / has a greater bioavailability for, the body.

ChevronB19

Original Poster:

6,758 posts

173 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
quotequote all
Thank you all for the advice (including the Stella comment, we have to find some humour in these situations).

Operation ‘poached egg on toast’ went well, so it’s a start.

P2KKA

148 posts

70 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
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Rather than suggesting foods to try, id echo another commenter. Find out what her favourite food is or favourite dish and cook it from scratch. Can be very rewarding and you are more likely to want eat it if you've made it!

Chainsaw Rebuild

2,071 posts

112 months

Wednesday 24th May 2023
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On a related note - I was doing sound for a lecture on depression once and the professor said that vitamin D and B12 can help - in his surgery he finds that about 10-20% of people with depression are deficient and over the counter vitamins help. I am a bit hazy because it was some time ago but he might have said omega 3 helps too.

Anyway I tend to feel a bit "flat" over the winter so I took them and I think it helps, so I would suggest going that - basically cant hurt.