University Rejection
Discussion
Son just got a formal rejection from his preferred University today, he starts his mocks on Monday, which obviously isn't great timing as could potentially lose interest in his exams.
He was hoping to go to Durham to study Economics, which I appreciate is a competitive course, at a competitive University, but was his first choice as didn't want to go to Oxford/Cambridge of the London Universities.
Bit of a sh!t night for him to be honest, and has friends over later, but really hasn't said much as yet.
I'm guessing the Universities give reasons for rejections ? He is doing Maths, Further Maths, Physics & Economics at A Level, and projected A* in them all, and got straight 9's at GCSE's in his 11 (I think) exams. Obviously as a parent I think it seems harsh, but am sure there are reasons, so would just like to understand better.
He was hoping to go to Durham to study Economics, which I appreciate is a competitive course, at a competitive University, but was his first choice as didn't want to go to Oxford/Cambridge of the London Universities.
Bit of a sh!t night for him to be honest, and has friends over later, but really hasn't said much as yet.
I'm guessing the Universities give reasons for rejections ? He is doing Maths, Further Maths, Physics & Economics at A Level, and projected A* in them all, and got straight 9's at GCSE's in his 11 (I think) exams. Obviously as a parent I think it seems harsh, but am sure there are reasons, so would just like to understand better.
With grades like that he's not going to just suddenly lose interest.
It's a rubbish situation, but a lesson that things don't always work out (even if it's somewhat harsh and very undeserved).
I'd remind him that he's a smart lad, and wherever he goes he'll have the potential to do well, be it in economics or whatever takes his fancy.
Best of luck to him.
It's a rubbish situation, but a lesson that things don't always work out (even if it's somewhat harsh and very undeserved).
I'd remind him that he's a smart lad, and wherever he goes he'll have the potential to do well, be it in economics or whatever takes his fancy.
Best of luck to him.
I guess he maybe doing one of the University admissions exams also then, possibly TMUA. Its not the end of the world. Both of mine got rejections from one of the establishments you mentioned for economics and then maths. I'm from the provinces so originally went to a comparatively much lower graded uni but my best mate ended up doing a PHd at Oxford after under graduate. Its your job as parent to act as his coach. This is a minor set back but he can and WILL still do well so give him a bit of a gee up.
My second child is a bit on the spectrum and less embarrassed by others opinion on him so he was straight back in the rejecting Uni's face asking them why. Sent a few emails, made a few calls and elicited a response that was..."well stay in touch". I have coached him not to pin his hopes on it but asking never hurts. My eldest was much too shy to do that.
Arm round him, tell him you still love him and his effort still matters and get back on it after Friday night off!
My second child is a bit on the spectrum and less embarrassed by others opinion on him so he was straight back in the rejecting Uni's face asking them why. Sent a few emails, made a few calls and elicited a response that was..."well stay in touch". I have coached him not to pin his hopes on it but asking never hurts. My eldest was much too shy to do that.
Arm round him, tell him you still love him and his effort still matters and get back on it after Friday night off!
Child #1 was rejected from both first and second choice and ended up in Edinburgh somewhere they’d never previously considered,
Now having graduated after a fantastic time, they can’t imagine having been anywhere else and settled there,
Sometimes these things, whilst frustrating at the time, turn out alright in the end
Now having graduated after a fantastic time, they can’t imagine having been anywhere else and settled there,
Sometimes these things, whilst frustrating at the time, turn out alright in the end
Hobo said:
Fully appreciate this could be for the best, but he'd set his mind on Durham after not bothering with Oxford/Cambridge & LSE.
He's got offers from his 'back up' selections, which were Manchester & Nottingham, and awaiting Warwick & Bristol.
If it helps, I loved my time at Warwick. Shame I had to graduate. He's got offers from his 'back up' selections, which were Manchester & Nottingham, and awaiting Warwick & Bristol.
So hopefully, he'll get an offer from there and also experience that.
He can't go wrong with those back ups.
I'd prefer Manchester just because I was brought up just outside, it's where my daughter went to Uni (MM) and she now works and lives there.
She was going to go to York but decided at the last minute to reject their offer and got in at MM through clearing.
Never regretted it.
It's my son's back up Uni as well after UEA and Loughborough.
I'd prefer Manchester just because I was brought up just outside, it's where my daughter went to Uni (MM) and she now works and lives there.
She was going to go to York but decided at the last minute to reject their offer and got in at MM through clearing.
Never regretted it.
It's my son's back up Uni as well after UEA and Loughborough.
Uni rejection was always a mystery. It trains you for when recruiters completely ignore you after you've interviewed for a role. You can only assume that it is something about the application and they want something more. With grades like those he will be able to choose an alternative or reapply for next year and take a year out to do something fun.
Durham is an odd uni. My wife went - key reason she was offered a place was Oxford was her first choice. Her grades were lower than expected.
I was offered a place on a post grad there with a 2:1...a mate who did his undergrad (1st) at Durham and applied for the same course as me was rejected.
The college system is cool, but he'll have just as much fun elsewhere.
Tell him not to worry.
I was offered a place on a post grad there with a 2:1...a mate who did his undergrad (1st) at Durham and applied for the same course as me was rejected.
The college system is cool, but he'll have just as much fun elsewhere.
Tell him not to worry.
TGCOTF-dewey said:
Durham is an odd uni. My wife went - key reason she was offered a place was Oxford was her first choice. Her grades were lower than expected.
I was offered a place on a post grad there with a 2:1...a mate who did his undergrad (1st) at Durham and applied for the same course as me was rejected.
??? Did they give a reason?I was offered a place on a post grad there with a 2:1...a mate who did his undergrad (1st) at Durham and applied for the same course as me was rejected.
Hobo said:
Son just got a formal rejection from his preferred University today, he starts his mocks on Monday, which obviously isn't great timing as could potentially lose interest in his exams.
He was hoping to go to Durham to study Economics, which I appreciate is a competitive course, at a competitive University, but was his first choice as didn't want to go to Oxford/Cambridge of the London Universities.
Bit of a sh!t night for him to be honest, and has friends over later, but really hasn't said much as yet.
I'm guessing the Universities give reasons for rejections ? He is doing Maths, Further Maths, Physics & Economics at A Level, and projected A* in them all, and got straight 9's at GCSE's in his 11 (I think) exams. Obviously as a parent I think it seems harsh, but am sure there are reasons, so would just like to understand better.
My first choice of uni rejected me, but I wrote to the head of department selling myself, got an interview and was accepted. I think the odds of your child being able to do that are slim (I was lucky I think). But they COULD try. It may be a good exercise in not taking NO for an answer.He was hoping to go to Durham to study Economics, which I appreciate is a competitive course, at a competitive University, but was his first choice as didn't want to go to Oxford/Cambridge of the London Universities.
Bit of a sh!t night for him to be honest, and has friends over later, but really hasn't said much as yet.
I'm guessing the Universities give reasons for rejections ? He is doing Maths, Further Maths, Physics & Economics at A Level, and projected A* in them all, and got straight 9's at GCSE's in his 11 (I think) exams. Obviously as a parent I think it seems harsh, but am sure there are reasons, so would just like to understand better.
That having been said: One of my brood was offered at Durham and they rejected the offer. Much as the prestige appealed, the campus(?) was not as well appointed as some others, the course seemed less than other unis too. Finally we had received feedback that the uni attracts a lot of monied people who can tend to be aloof and not integrate that well.
Some advice if I may:
Give him space to be disappointed - this genuinely is tough news.
When he's ready, remind him his academic abilities haven't changed. The rejection reflects Durham's specific choices this year, not his potential.
For the mocks, help create a manageable study routine that acknowledges his emotional state. Short, focused sessions might work better than pushing too hard.
When appropriate, discuss his insurance choices with him. Many students find their second-choice universities end up being perfect fits.
Consider requesting feedback from Durham for closure.
Your confidence in him matters tremendously right now. With his exceptional academic record, he has numerous paths to success ahead.
Give him space to be disappointed - this genuinely is tough news.
When he's ready, remind him his academic abilities haven't changed. The rejection reflects Durham's specific choices this year, not his potential.
For the mocks, help create a manageable study routine that acknowledges his emotional state. Short, focused sessions might work better than pushing too hard.
When appropriate, discuss his insurance choices with him. Many students find their second-choice universities end up being perfect fits.
Consider requesting feedback from Durham for closure.
Your confidence in him matters tremendously right now. With his exceptional academic record, he has numerous paths to success ahead.
Hobo said:
didn't want to go to Oxford/Cambridge of the London Universities
I get Oxbridge, but for economics, London would be worth consideration, unless it’s for financial/economic reasons - clearly it’s not the cheapest place to studyMy daughter visited Durham and hated everything about it, said it was like a slightly bigger version of her school in the countryside (actually said the same of Exeter). She got her masters at LSE, and you couldn’t do better for Economics. Also UCL, Imperial, Kings are near the top of pretty much every global university ranking
The thing about university entrance these days is that it has changed from when the OP (and the rest of us) were applying. Here’s what Durham have on their Ucas page:
Whilst many of our applicants exceed our entry requirements, we don’t make offers based only on who has the highest grades. We’ll look at your background, context and personal statement as well as your academic grades when we consider your application.
I suspect the reason is in there somewhere. The university market is increasingly international, and so the kids applying now are competing against their peers from around the world. There’s also a much greater emphasis on your interest outside pure study. I don’t just mean extracurricular, but the increasing emphasis on “supracurricular” activities.
PS OP - I was like your son in that I didn’t want to apply for Oxbridge (as that would have required a actually having to put some effort in). I regret that a little and wish I’d at least given it a shot, even if only to have my mediocrity confirmed! I’d have done some growing up I think. Rejection is good for you. Instead I took the easy path and and easy degree.
Good luck!
Whilst many of our applicants exceed our entry requirements, we don’t make offers based only on who has the highest grades. We’ll look at your background, context and personal statement as well as your academic grades when we consider your application.
I suspect the reason is in there somewhere. The university market is increasingly international, and so the kids applying now are competing against their peers from around the world. There’s also a much greater emphasis on your interest outside pure study. I don’t just mean extracurricular, but the increasing emphasis on “supracurricular” activities.
PS OP - I was like your son in that I didn’t want to apply for Oxbridge (as that would have required a actually having to put some effort in). I regret that a little and wish I’d at least given it a shot, even if only to have my mediocrity confirmed! I’d have done some growing up I think. Rejection is good for you. Instead I took the easy path and and easy degree.
Good luck!
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