Tips for Shrugging Off Negative things?

[Chainsaw Rebuild]

Hello all, long story short I’m currently in a job that doesn’t suit me very well. I’m good at the work and get on the others but the fundamental problem is I’m really a freelancer who’s having to be PAYE for a bit.

This job isn’t forever because growing my own business. But for now the wage is handy.

Anyway my question is; when you meet with frustration and negative things how do you shrug it off quickly?

I had a disagreement with a manager who was clearly wrong on a legislative point. As it happens; I know my stuff, I also double checked the regs and I’m right.

I’m doing my best to leave it behind me, but it takes me too long I feel. I have said to myself “I’m right, his lack of experiance is why he’s being difficult and it doesn’t matter anyway because I’m off in a few months - forget it”. And mostly I have but it still lingers a bit since it happened on Monday.

Is this just me? Do you have a method for getting over things quickly?

[Gary29]

I used to feel like this, it's difficult, but you just have to 'care less'.

We're impossibly insignificant, nothing really matters in the grand scheme of things. Take a deep breath, and walk away, presumably your manager is getting compensated for being the deciding voice, so just let him get on with it.

It might sting your moral compass at first, but being less pro-active will be better for your stress levels in the long run, especially if this is just a stepping stone.

[mikef]

If people being wrong and belligerent about it triggers you, you're probably on the wrong web site

[Sporky]

Jasey_ said:

You can't cure moron.

My wife phrases it as "you can't teach pork".

I'm not great at putting up with this, but I've found "go limp" a useful internal phrase. You might jot like being picked up by a bear and carried off to its cave, but your best bet is to go limp and escape later. You won't win the stand-up fight.

[w8pmc]

Can't add much, but like you i encounter these people in/out of work all the time (guessing like we all do).

Mantra i've lived by for years is 'if winning a fight/argument gives me little satisfaction, walk away & forget'

This has served me well & am now very good at just laughing these scenarios off & give them very little second thought.

Unfortunately they walk among us & the number of 'them' is rapidly increasing.

[Billy_Rosewood]

The "trick" applies to life in general.. I always try to remember the phrase during the lows..

https://youtu.be/uWNw13ZOaEY?si=mJcM2wxz6G4svIvA

[Seventyseven7]

mikef said:

If people being wrong and belligerent about it triggers you, you're probably on the wrong web site

[Chainsaw Rebuild]

Seventyseven7 said:

mikef said:

If people being wrong and belligerent about it triggers you, you're probably on the wrong web site

I thought this was good too.

[Chainsaw Rebuild]

Thanks chaps, you are right and I shall endeavour to care less about this job.

“Take what you can, and give nothing back!” Captain Jack Sparrow. (And actually sailors).

[ecs]

[carinaman]

Useful thread. It's a stop gap role and income. Look at the big picture and further down the road.

[Collectingbrass]

While I agree with all the above I would, given you've mentioned legisiation and regs, drop him a simple email saying you've discussed situation x and will follow his direction y to do z about it. Don't mention that you still disagree, just state the facts then print a pdf and send it to your non work email. Never give a fk and always cover your arse.

[Steve H]

ecs said:

This makes a lot of sense.

Like anyone, I sometimes feel the pull that makes me think that something is reeeeealy important, but have to remind myself that it absolutely isn’t. Then I feel a lot better.

[MOBB]

Watching with interest, and also buying that book