Throwing it all away?
Discussion
So let me preface this by saying that I understand how fortunate I am in my situation. I’m not some powerfully built CEO but at 27, myself and my wife live a comfortable life with our dog.
I’ve been an engineer now for 9 years or so. 7.5 years in automotive and latterly in aerospace. We have a nice house, a decent garden and family local. We are paid well, but not stupidly dizzy figures. My folks aren’t in the best of health but my wife’s are fine, generally speaking.
Recently I’ve had an existential crisis - not really sure how I want to progress my career nor whether I’d like to even stay in engineering. I have hobbies outside of work like gardening, coffee and sourdough, and long for the time where I can buy a small holding and just live off the land.
For some reason I see myself as a business owner, but I just can’t get my head around it. Love digging holes and basic groundwork, and also putting things back and creating functional but practical spaces. Of course I know that this doesn’t mean I’m now qualified to do landscaping or anything but I can’t help but think if it’d be a career more suited to my personal perspectives.
Basically a bit of a rant but I can’t help but feel that it’s not normal to feel this way at 27, and so early in my career.
Suppose I’m looking for advice really on what to do, but also would appreciate some of the usual “stop being an idiot you’ve got it made” comments to snap me back to reality.
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, right?
I’ve been an engineer now for 9 years or so. 7.5 years in automotive and latterly in aerospace. We have a nice house, a decent garden and family local. We are paid well, but not stupidly dizzy figures. My folks aren’t in the best of health but my wife’s are fine, generally speaking.
Recently I’ve had an existential crisis - not really sure how I want to progress my career nor whether I’d like to even stay in engineering. I have hobbies outside of work like gardening, coffee and sourdough, and long for the time where I can buy a small holding and just live off the land.
For some reason I see myself as a business owner, but I just can’t get my head around it. Love digging holes and basic groundwork, and also putting things back and creating functional but practical spaces. Of course I know that this doesn’t mean I’m now qualified to do landscaping or anything but I can’t help but think if it’d be a career more suited to my personal perspectives.
Basically a bit of a rant but I can’t help but feel that it’s not normal to feel this way at 27, and so early in my career.
Suppose I’m looking for advice really on what to do, but also would appreciate some of the usual “stop being an idiot you’ve got it made” comments to snap me back to reality.
You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, right?
What does Mrs. GoFast think?
Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
I think its a fairly common feeling, call it a 1/4 life crisis. you are rapidly losing your 20's soon to be the big 3 0.
I went through the same thing and made some rash decisions, But you know what, you hit 30, nothing changes really and life goes on.
I realise everyone is different, but your hobbies are more suited to someone retired, is sourdough even a hobby? This is pistonheads, you are young... buy a daft car, do some trackdays, go travelling, have an affair etc. ok that last one was tongue in cheek but you get the idea.
I went through the same thing and made some rash decisions, But you know what, you hit 30, nothing changes really and life goes on.
I realise everyone is different, but your hobbies are more suited to someone retired, is sourdough even a hobby? This is pistonheads, you are young... buy a daft car, do some trackdays, go travelling, have an affair etc. ok that last one was tongue in cheek but you get the idea.
Pixel Pusher said:
What does Mrs. GoFast think?
Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
Honestly it's a good question about what my wife thinks. The answer is that she would drop everything in a heartbeat and move with me. She works in the Civil Service in a relatively secure sector. She could move her regular office, and she only goes in 1x per week anyway.Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
She's taken with the idea of a smallholding and I think a large part of that is because she sees how much I enjoy it. It's honestly a very nice situation to be in - both of us being on the same page and wanting the same thing. The MIL has also expressed interest in moving to wherever we go (not same house, but same area), so some of her support network would also be coming, which is nice.
I've pretty much done our garden in the middle of wet November, been outside digging out tree stumps in pouring rain and hand-digging out foundations for a ~55sqm patio in sub-10C temps. Of course I know that this isn't sustainable long-term and as I get older, so would have to invest in some plant machinery.
The office doesn't do anything for me. I spend all day thinking about what I'd be doing in my garden or my next project. Recently we got chickens, which fuelled this fire even more - building the run, harvesting the rainwater, getting the eggs etc. Honestly our neighbours must think we're direct from the good life.
I suppose I'm looking for more of a lifestyle change in the long-run, but for now more of a career change (leaving my cushy job) to be outside more, which may be transferrable when I do eventually realise the small-holding dream.
I started my own frim at 26 - 15 years later we are busier than ever - Great team of people and I love it
For me it was the best decision I have ever made - Its not for everyone mind you so don't get sucked into it with out really trying to understand the pressures of running a business
For me it was the best decision I have ever made - Its not for everyone mind you so don't get sucked into it with out really trying to understand the pressures of running a business
Its a tough one and only you and your missus can decide. You need to way up the pros and cons either way.
Many people take the safe option and stay in a job and career that pays the bills but doesn't really fulfill them. Those same people tend to make family, kids, hobbies the focal point of their life, and that's fine.
Other people need the challenge and jump around jobs and are natural born entrepreneurs. Staying in a "pays the bills" job would be slow suicide for them.
Personally I'm the first type. I work in IT but I'd happily spend me days building and fixing bikes if it paid the mortgage!
Many people take the safe option and stay in a job and career that pays the bills but doesn't really fulfill them. Those same people tend to make family, kids, hobbies the focal point of their life, and that's fine.
Other people need the challenge and jump around jobs and are natural born entrepreneurs. Staying in a "pays the bills" job would be slow suicide for them.
Personally I'm the first type. I work in IT but I'd happily spend me days building and fixing bikes if it paid the mortgage!
Pixel Pusher said:
What does Mrs. GoFast think?
Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
As above, I think it’s normal for a lot of people to wonder whether other jobs would be more rewarding/enjoyable/better in other ways. Your landscape gardeners might well dream of being in an office or an engineer in the winter months when it’s chucking it down and back’s hurting. Can you find a way to incorporate more of your hobbies into your life without leaving your job? Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
Have a weekend gig making/selling sourdough?
Drop down a day or two at your current work and try your hand at something different on the other days?
tactical lizard said:
I think its a fairly common feeling, call it a 1/4 life crisis. you are rapidly losing your 20's soon to be the big 3 0.
I went through the same thing and made some rash decisions, But you know what, you hit 30, nothing changes really and life goes on.
I realise everyone is different, but your hobbies are more suited to someone retired, is sourdough even a hobby? This is pistonheads, you are young... buy a daft car, do some trackdays, go travelling, have an affair etc. ok that last one was tongue in cheek but you get the idea.
Yeah - the age thing doesn't really bother me too much but I guess what you are describing is right. Never even knew 1/4 life crises were a thing honestly.I went through the same thing and made some rash decisions, But you know what, you hit 30, nothing changes really and life goes on.
I realise everyone is different, but your hobbies are more suited to someone retired, is sourdough even a hobby? This is pistonheads, you are young... buy a daft car, do some trackdays, go travelling, have an affair etc. ok that last one was tongue in cheek but you get the idea.
It's true that my hobbies are sad and quite solitary - they're like that for a reason. I also do like cars and motorbikes. Only issue being that we are extending in the immediate future so all cash going there - no chance to buy stupid cars or bikes!
I'm not taken by travelling in honesty. Yes it's lovely to go somewhere hot or new, but I generally struggle with different social environments and feel really out of my comfort zone when abroad. I'll let the mrs know about the affair and see what she says. I'm sure she'd be game.
andy_ran said:
I started my own frim at 26 - 15 years later we are busier than ever - Great team of people and I love it
For me it was the best decision I have ever made - Its not for everyone mind you so don't get sucked into it with out really trying to understand the pressures of running a business
Is that a landscaping firm, or something else? Appreciate that not everyone is made to be a business owner, but I feel so wasted as an engineer in a (lets be honest) place where you don't really do engineering any more. I'm effectively a glorified email sender.For me it was the best decision I have ever made - Its not for everyone mind you so don't get sucked into it with out really trying to understand the pressures of running a business
T1547 said:
As above, I think it’s normal for a lot of people to wonder whether other jobs would be more rewarding/enjoyable/better in other ways. Your landscape gardeners might well dream of being in an office or an engineer in the winter months when it’s chucking it down and back’s hurting. Can you find a way to incorporate more of your hobbies into your life without leaving your job?
Have a weekend gig making/selling sourdough?
Drop down a day or two at your current work and try your hand at something different on the other days?
Yeah - it's a grass is always greener type scenario I suppose. I could do the sourdough selling etc. but my house isn't currently in the position for getting any form of food hygiene ratings.Have a weekend gig making/selling sourdough?
Drop down a day or two at your current work and try your hand at something different on the other days?
I had thought about dropping down to a 3/4 day week at work, but as we are extending at the moment and coming up, we need all the extra cash we can get really.
Trying2GoFast said:
unbiased said:
Does sourdough pass as a hobby these days?
Suppose that's dependent on the person really - I bake about 20 loaves a week and have 2x dedicated ovens, a mixer, and half of our dining room... You’ve been in your career long enough to know whether it’s a long term fit. You’re only here once and your heart is telling you to change direction. Only you know all the details on which you can make the decision, but from what you’ve typed, it seems to me you’ve already made it.
T1547 said:
....
Have a weekend gig making/selling sourdough?...
That sounds like what the OP needs. Get a stall at the local 'famers market' and start selling the bread (although perhaps that's what he does with the 20 loaves he already makes) and maybe coffees if that's another interest. (I often think there is a gap in the market for someone selling cheap filter coffee made with decent beans - nicer than instant but less faff than espressos that most punters ruin by having too much milk with it).Have a weekend gig making/selling sourdough?...
Maybe stop working on a Friday and use that as the baking day for weekend events.
As a 'hobby job' it perhaps doesn't even have to turn a huge profit.
Trying2GoFast said:
Pixel Pusher said:
What does Mrs. GoFast think?
Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
Honestly it's a good question about what my wife thinks. The answer is that she would drop everything in a heartbeat and move with me. She works in the Civil Service in a relatively secure sector. She could move her regular office, and she only goes in 1x per week anyway.Ultimately, you only have to justify your decision to her & yourself don't you?
I guess at this time of year being a landscape gardener has it's attractions but when you are self employed and deep into the winter up to your waist in mud...will you miss the comfort of the office?
She's taken with the idea of a smallholding and I think a large part of that is because she sees how much I enjoy it. It's honestly a very nice situation to be in - both of us being on the same page and wanting the same thing. The MIL has also expressed interest in moving to wherever we go (not same house, but same area), so some of her support network would also be coming, which is nice.
I've pretty much done our garden in the middle of wet November, been outside digging out tree stumps in pouring rain and hand-digging out foundations for a ~55sqm patio in sub-10C temps. Of course I know that this isn't sustainable long-term and as I get older, so would have to invest in some plant machinery.
The office doesn't do anything for me. I spend all day thinking about what I'd be doing in my garden or my next project. Recently we got chickens, which fuelled this fire even more - building the run, harvesting the rainwater, getting the eggs etc. Honestly our neighbours must think we're direct from the good life.
I suppose I'm looking for more of a lifestyle change in the long-run, but for now more of a career change (leaving my cushy job) to be outside more, which may be transferrable when I do eventually realise the small-holding dream.
As someone else has said, do some research to work out how your income will work out. What will you charge for in a business, how much can you charge and work out your overall estimate of revenue and costs.
It's a big step going from the comfort of secure employee to own business with all the related exposure and risk.
You sound like you really enjoy the outside, you enjoy the hard work and that you are cut out for it. Is your wife similar or will she find it too hard work in the long term?
If the business case works out then it sounds like you should go for it since your heart is in this.
Make sure you have a big reserve of savings first.
Having read a couple of your replies, I'd just go with it. Don't worry about others who may judge you because you have it all now. If you can make it work, by the time you're 40 and looking back, you will not have regretted it. Just check the numbers before you make a financial mistake.
Hello, fellow quarter life crisis club member here, I'm on my third at the ripe old age of 31.
I have an engineering degree and masters too but I am currently stuck in a job I got in Covid putting up crash barrier. I like bits of it but I've never been a company person. I have worked for myself in the past and it is great. Hard work but you do it because you care.
After running an ultimately u successful business, I feel it would be good to start at the weekend and build it because you then have the financial back up of a job.
I'm one thing away from rage quitting my job due to empty promises and bulls
t but I know it would be a bad idea. I'm looking for a pathway to a lucrative business to set up with the experience I have. Difficult as I have a small one on the way!
I have an engineering degree and masters too but I am currently stuck in a job I got in Covid putting up crash barrier. I like bits of it but I've never been a company person. I have worked for myself in the past and it is great. Hard work but you do it because you care.
After running an ultimately u successful business, I feel it would be good to start at the weekend and build it because you then have the financial back up of a job.
I'm one thing away from rage quitting my job due to empty promises and bulls
t but I know it would be a bad idea. I'm looking for a pathway to a lucrative business to set up with the experience I have. Difficult as I have a small one on the way!Gassing Station | Jobs & Employment Matters | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff