Advanced Driving advice for Santa

[erdnase]

In the spirit of the season, let's give some Advanced Driving tips to the guy who has to cover the most miles in these wintery conditions - Santa Claus.

Not many people know that Santa is an acomplished advanced driver, familiar with techniques such as Heel and Ho-Ho-Ho, and in any trackday events is always in Pole position.

However, when delivering presents, he is always on the public road, and as such has to tailor his driving style to suit the conditions. Not many people have heard of Bernard the Brown Nose Reindeer. He's the reindeer at the front of the pack when Santa was tailgaiting and the sleigh in front stopped suddenly. Now he's always sure to leave a good 2 second gap.

Anyway, I'm struggling with puns here, and I'm sure the PH massive can do much better. Merry Christmas to you all, and safe driving!

[WhoseGeneration]

Santa, shouldn't be allowed out, eons old ancient bloke, in charge of unpredictable animals.
"Elf, or elves and safety", missed this one.
Travelling at night, no lights, under Construction and Use or Air Navigation rules?
I want him stopped now, a total menace whether on road or in sky.
Surely our "caring" Government will heed my plea.
Or, perhaps we should set vonhosen upon him?

[F i F]

He needs to be warned about the perils of SMPOL.





Nothing to do with a joint operation between Strathclyde and the Met, no it's the dangers of Sherry, Mince Pie Over Lap. Frozen sherry soaked mince pie crumbs being particularly difficult to remove from the beard.

[gdaybruce]

In best Pistonheads style:

"Speed Matters - Think of the Children!"

[WhoseGeneration]

F i F said:

He needs to be warned about the perils of SMPOL.





Nothing to do with a joint operation between Strathclyde and the Met, no it's the dangers of Sherry, Mince Pie Over Lap. Frozen sherry soaked mince pie crumbs being particularly difficult to remove from the beard.

I shied away from the potential DD charge.
He is a poor example to hold up to our younger citizens.