Plumbing Innuendos
Discussion
tter?For inspiration, from Fry + Laurie:
Hugh: Help you sir?
Stephen: Um, a dozen grollings please.
Hugh: Flushed or galvanized?
Stephen: Flushed.
Hugh: Right. That be it?
Stephen: A copper flange-pipe, braced, two jubilees, seven nipples...
Hugh: Greased?
Stephen: Greased nipples, yeah. Five olive-spantles, jigged and onioned.
Hugh: Twelve or seventeen mil?
Stephen: Twelve. Metre of fleeling wire, co-axial, twenty UJs and a parping couplet.
Hugh: Male or female?
Stephen: Male. No - second thoughts - one of each.
Hugh: Do you want the parping couplet standing proud?
Stephen: No... embarrassed, I think.
Hugh: An embarrassed parping couplet. That it?
Stephen: Two rolls of spowling tape.
Hugh: Double-sided?
Stephen: Do they do single-sided?
Hugh: Only in Viennese lengths.
Stephen: Better go with double then. Six sheets of gruddock paper.
Hugh: Parkinised?
Stephen: No.
Hugh: Right.
Stephen: Nearly there. Four felching pens and a bevelled spill-trunion.
Hugh: Only got one felching pen left. Got some frotting pencils though.
Stephen: Will they do?
Hugh: Well - you know the thrush-plate?
Stephen: Yeah.
Hugh: You can use a frotting pencil on that, rude to the lookout-valve on the fumpspoke, and you can cut out the felching altogether... as long as you rim the satchel-arm properly first.
Stephen: Right - four frotting pencils then.
Hugh: So that's it, is it?
Stephen: Yup.
Hugh: You've already got a clip-jawed double lock brace, have you?
Stephen: D'you reckon I'll need one?
Hugh: Well, are you going straight or curved?
Stephen: Straight, then curved.
Hugh: Ah. Well you should be all right then, as long as you remember to suck the clenching pin tight to the arc thrust.
Stephen fetches Hugh one across the face.
Stephen: How dare you!
Hugh: Sorry.
Hugh: Help you sir?
Stephen: Um, a dozen grollings please.
Hugh: Flushed or galvanized?
Stephen: Flushed.
Hugh: Right. That be it?
Stephen: A copper flange-pipe, braced, two jubilees, seven nipples...
Hugh: Greased?
Stephen: Greased nipples, yeah. Five olive-spantles, jigged and onioned.
Hugh: Twelve or seventeen mil?
Stephen: Twelve. Metre of fleeling wire, co-axial, twenty UJs and a parping couplet.
Hugh: Male or female?
Stephen: Male. No - second thoughts - one of each.
Hugh: Do you want the parping couplet standing proud?
Stephen: No... embarrassed, I think.
Hugh: An embarrassed parping couplet. That it?
Stephen: Two rolls of spowling tape.
Hugh: Double-sided?
Stephen: Do they do single-sided?
Hugh: Only in Viennese lengths.
Stephen: Better go with double then. Six sheets of gruddock paper.
Hugh: Parkinised?
Stephen: No.
Hugh: Right.
Stephen: Nearly there. Four felching pens and a bevelled spill-trunion.
Hugh: Only got one felching pen left. Got some frotting pencils though.
Stephen: Will they do?
Hugh: Well - you know the thrush-plate?
Stephen: Yeah.
Hugh: You can use a frotting pencil on that, rude to the lookout-valve on the fumpspoke, and you can cut out the felching altogether... as long as you rim the satchel-arm properly first.
Stephen: Right - four frotting pencils then.
Hugh: So that's it, is it?
Stephen: Yup.
Hugh: You've already got a clip-jawed double lock brace, have you?
Stephen: D'you reckon I'll need one?
Hugh: Well, are you going straight or curved?
Stephen: Straight, then curved.
Hugh: Ah. Well you should be all right then, as long as you remember to suck the clenching pin tight to the arc thrust.
Stephen fetches Hugh one across the face.
Stephen: How dare you!
Hugh: Sorry.
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