Ex Partner - Mortgage Advice
Discussion
Hi Folks, I guess besides the obvious jokes, I am in need of some advice....
3 months ago I split with my partner of 13 years after she fell in-love with another. At the time I thought I didn't want to stay in the house so left. Unfortunately at the age of 40 I find myself back at my parents.
We have agreed a settlement figure and she wishes to stay in the house, all this is fine as to be honest I am better off out of it all now
The problem resides in the Mortgage, it was in joint names and as such she has applied to transfer it all into her name. This should not be an issue as she earns very good money. I have until now remained contributing to my half of the monthly payments.
The issue is it all appears to have stalled, her solicitor is stuck awaiting the paper work from the Abbey National which appears to be taking an age. I can't contact them to speed things up as all I can find out is the payments are still being made and that my name is still on the agreement.
So any sensible advice, am I within my rights to stop funding the mortgage now ? Should I plead my case to the Abbey more ?
It's all a bit up in the air !
I don't want to make things difficult but refuse to fund someone elses lifestyle.
Any ideas ?
3 months ago I split with my partner of 13 years after she fell in-love with another. At the time I thought I didn't want to stay in the house so left. Unfortunately at the age of 40 I find myself back at my parents.
We have agreed a settlement figure and she wishes to stay in the house, all this is fine as to be honest I am better off out of it all now
The problem resides in the Mortgage, it was in joint names and as such she has applied to transfer it all into her name. This should not be an issue as she earns very good money. I have until now remained contributing to my half of the monthly payments.
The issue is it all appears to have stalled, her solicitor is stuck awaiting the paper work from the Abbey National which appears to be taking an age. I can't contact them to speed things up as all I can find out is the payments are still being made and that my name is still on the agreement.
So any sensible advice, am I within my rights to stop funding the mortgage now ? Should I plead my case to the Abbey more ?
It's all a bit up in the air !
I don't want to make things difficult but refuse to fund someone elses lifestyle.
Any ideas ?
ianreeves said:
Hi Folks, I guess besides the obvious jokes, I am in need of some advice....
3 months ago I split with my partner of 13 years after she fell in-love with another. At the time I thought I didn't want to stay in the house so left. Unfortunately at the age of 40 I find myself back at my parents.
We have agreed a settlement figure and she wishes to stay in the house, all this is fine as to be honest I am better off out of it all now
The problem resides in the Mortgage, it was in joint names and as such she has applied to transfer it all into her name. This should not be an issue as she earns very good money. I have until now remained contributing to my half of the monthly payments.
The issue is it all appears to have stalled, her solicitor is stuck awaiting the paper work from the Abbey National which appears to be taking an age. I can't contact them to speed things up as all I can find out is the payments are still being made and that my name is still on the agreement.
So any sensible advice, am I within my rights to stop funding the mortgage now ? Should I plead my case to the Abbey more ?
It's all a bit up in the air !
I don't want to make things difficult but refuse to fund someone elses lifestyle.
Any ideas ?
I assume you will be getting half the value of the house less the outstanding mortgage. So as you are paying the mortgage effectively you will be getting it back at a later date.3 months ago I split with my partner of 13 years after she fell in-love with another. At the time I thought I didn't want to stay in the house so left. Unfortunately at the age of 40 I find myself back at my parents.
We have agreed a settlement figure and she wishes to stay in the house, all this is fine as to be honest I am better off out of it all now
The problem resides in the Mortgage, it was in joint names and as such she has applied to transfer it all into her name. This should not be an issue as she earns very good money. I have until now remained contributing to my half of the monthly payments.
The issue is it all appears to have stalled, her solicitor is stuck awaiting the paper work from the Abbey National which appears to be taking an age. I can't contact them to speed things up as all I can find out is the payments are still being made and that my name is still on the agreement.
So any sensible advice, am I within my rights to stop funding the mortgage now ? Should I plead my case to the Abbey more ?
It's all a bit up in the air !
I don't want to make things difficult but refuse to fund someone elses lifestyle.
Any ideas ?
Yes you are right, the issue I have is time scale. She can drag this on as long as she likes.........
Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Olf said:
She started shagging someone else
You moved out
She earns good money
You still pay half of the mortgage.
You're doing this all wrong - time to get legal.
Not much they can do either, the Building society won't communicate to anyone else.You moved out
She earns good money
You still pay half of the mortgage.
You're doing this all wrong - time to get legal.
To be honest I had hoped she would want it all over ASAP.
ianreeves said:
Yes you are right, the issue I have is time scale. She can drag this on as long as she likes.........
Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Move back in with your new girlfriend. That should speed things up a bit.Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Olf said:
ianreeves said:
Yes you are right, the issue I have is time scale. She can drag this on as long as she likes.........
Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Move back in with your new girlfriend. That should speed things up a bit.Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
espically if it is her sister
SplatSpeed said:
Olf said:
ianreeves said:
Yes you are right, the issue I have is time scale. She can drag this on as long as she likes.........
Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Move back in with your new girlfriend. That should speed things up a bit.Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
espically if it is her sister
She does not know I am seeing anyone. I am not sure that would help !
ianreeves said:
SplatSpeed said:
Olf said:
ianreeves said:
Yes you are right, the issue I have is time scale. She can drag this on as long as she likes.........
Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Move back in with your new girlfriend. That should speed things up a bit.Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
espically if it is her sister
She does not know I am seeing anyone. I am not sure that would help !
e-mail is your friend, and also a record of what is said.
1. Do you have a solicitor acting for you in connection with the transfer of the house? If not why not? it should be no more than £350+vat and you NEED to make sure that this is done properly or else you could be FUBARed in the future. GET A SOLICITOR.
2. Have you started to sort out the division of other assets? if not get it recorded what you have having (the 10th anniversary napkin rings, etc and make sure you are 100% agreed as to EXACTLY what she is keeping and what you are taking.
3 Have you instructed a solicitor to sort out a consent agreement? if not why not? You MUST have one of these in place before you buy anything else house wise! If not there is no 100% certainty they will not claim against you on this. Unless you have a 'clean break' consent order, agreed and sealed by the courts all bets are off. She (or you) could go back to the court and ask for more, even if that be in 20 years time.
I am not a Family Solicitor but a property one so whilst i am fairly certain what i have said which is off my pitch is correct do not rely on it, GO AND SEE A FAMILY LAW SOLICITOR NOW!!!
Above all else DO NOT sign a damn thing until you have been told you can by a solicitor. Spend a little now and get it sorted right the first time with nothing hanging over your head or try to do it on the cheap and keep looking over your shoulder, forever. Your call.
edit to correct spulings.
1. Do you have a solicitor acting for you in connection with the transfer of the house? If not why not? it should be no more than £350+vat and you NEED to make sure that this is done properly or else you could be FUBARed in the future. GET A SOLICITOR.
2. Have you started to sort out the division of other assets? if not get it recorded what you have having (the 10th anniversary napkin rings, etc and make sure you are 100% agreed as to EXACTLY what she is keeping and what you are taking.
3 Have you instructed a solicitor to sort out a consent agreement? if not why not? You MUST have one of these in place before you buy anything else house wise! If not there is no 100% certainty they will not claim against you on this. Unless you have a 'clean break' consent order, agreed and sealed by the courts all bets are off. She (or you) could go back to the court and ask for more, even if that be in 20 years time.
I am not a Family Solicitor but a property one so whilst i am fairly certain what i have said which is off my pitch is correct do not rely on it, GO AND SEE A FAMILY LAW SOLICITOR NOW!!!
Above all else DO NOT sign a damn thing until you have been told you can by a solicitor. Spend a little now and get it sorted right the first time with nothing hanging over your head or try to do it on the cheap and keep looking over your shoulder, forever. Your call.
edit to correct spulings.
Edited by rude-boy on Tuesday 7th October 13:19
Sounds like you are being led up the garden path. Her solicitor won't be getting any paperwork from the mortgage company until she's made an appointment and been in, then filled out a load of forms to see if she can afford the mortgage on her salary. That will take about six weeks, then it'll go over to the solicitor. Whole process usually takes between 3 and 9 months....but from the sound of it she's not even made the first step? Otherwise you'd both know wether she can afford it or not.
Call a local estate agent and put the house on the market. It only takes one owner, no matter how many others there are, to cause the sale of a property.
Put it on sale at a VERY competitive price. One which will cause buyers, even today, to sit up and notice.
A 'For Sale' sign in the garden and viewers traipsing round will REALLY focus her mind.
Put it on sale at a VERY competitive price. One which will cause buyers, even today, to sit up and notice.
A 'For Sale' sign in the garden and viewers traipsing round will REALLY focus her mind.
rude-boy said:
e-mail is your friend, and also a record of what is said.
1. Do you have a solicitor acting for you in connection with the transfer of the house? If not why not? it should be no more than £350+vat and you NEED to make sure that this is done properly or else you could be FUBARed in the future. GET A SOLICITOR.
2. Have you started to sort out the division of other assets? if not get it recorded what you have having (the 10th anniversary napkin rings, etc and make sure you are 100% agreed as to EXACTLY what she is keeping and what you are taking.
3 Have you instructed a solicitor to sort out a consent agreement? if not why not? You MUST have one of these in place before you buy anything else house wise! If not there is no 100% certainty they will not claim against you on this. Unless you have a 'clean break' consent order, agreed and sealed by the courts all bets are off. She (or you) could go back to the court and ask for more, even if that be in 20 years time.
I am not a Family Solicitor but a property one so whilst i am fairly certain what i have said which is off my pitch is correct do not rely on it, GO AND SEE A FAMILY LAW SOLICITOR NOW!!!
Above all else DO NOT sign a damn thing until you have been told you can by a solicitor. Spend a little now and get it sorted right the first time with nothing hanging over your head or try to do it on the cheap and keep looking over your shoulder, forever. Your call.
edit to correct spulings.
Ok, to answer some questions. I have seen a solicitor and yes you are correct. The work is being done by her solicitor this is the agreement and he is drawing up the transfer agreement as you say. Only one of us needs to do this again I will get it reviewed before I sign, but am not anticiating any issues. In that respect it should be easy, they draw up the document, my solicitor reviews it. I sign job done.1. Do you have a solicitor acting for you in connection with the transfer of the house? If not why not? it should be no more than £350+vat and you NEED to make sure that this is done properly or else you could be FUBARed in the future. GET A SOLICITOR.
2. Have you started to sort out the division of other assets? if not get it recorded what you have having (the 10th anniversary napkin rings, etc and make sure you are 100% agreed as to EXACTLY what she is keeping and what you are taking.
3 Have you instructed a solicitor to sort out a consent agreement? if not why not? You MUST have one of these in place before you buy anything else house wise! If not there is no 100% certainty they will not claim against you on this. Unless you have a 'clean break' consent order, agreed and sealed by the courts all bets are off. She (or you) could go back to the court and ask for more, even if that be in 20 years time.
I am not a Family Solicitor but a property one so whilst i am fairly certain what i have said which is off my pitch is correct do not rely on it, GO AND SEE A FAMILY LAW SOLICITOR NOW!!!
Above all else DO NOT sign a damn thing until you have been told you can by a solicitor. Spend a little now and get it sorted right the first time with nothing hanging over your head or try to do it on the cheap and keep looking over your shoulder, forever. Your call.
edit to correct spulings.
Edited by rude-boy on Tuesday 7th October 13:19
Yes, the inside 'assets' are divided and sorted, I want only a few things and this is agreed.
I know the building society has been informed and I believe all the work has started, the issue is the transfer paperwork has not been issued. The mortgage is only £75k and she earns over £50k pa.
To add we were never married.
Now to be honest I think this is an Abbey issue as they are slow, but would be nice to speak to someone to see what's going on !
Edited by ianreeves on Tuesday 7th October 21:12
SplatSpeed said:
ianreeves said:
SplatSpeed said:
Olf said:
ianreeves said:
Yes you are right, the issue I have is time scale. She can drag this on as long as she likes.........
Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
Move back in with your new girlfriend. That should speed things up a bit.Upto now I have paid sightly more such as the contents insurance etc, but as nothing of mine is in there I don't see the point in paying those. I will change this from next month to half mortgage only.
I want to get a house myself and have one I like and would love to be in by xmas.
To be honest I don't want to speak to her, although I am 'over' it all I don't want to rake up the past and I am sure I'd only making it worse.
espically if it is her sister
She does not know I am seeing anyone. I am not sure that would help !
My solicitor said I should not have left, but at the time you don't think about that.
Since then I have met someone else who is such a breath of fresh air..
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