I want a refund

[Jaglover]

Ananova said:

Man lodges complaint over rejected proposal A Romanian tried to lodge a complaint with consumer protection officials after his girlfriend refused to marry him. Petru M, from Botosani, says he felt cheated when she turned down his marriage proposal without giving any solid reasons. He demanded to be 'tested' and wanted a certificate to prove he is qualified to become a good husband. The head of the consumers office in Botosani, Dumitru Monacu, said: "The man complained his ex-girlfriend refuses to marry him even if, he says, she doesn't have any good reason. "He wanted us to issue a kind of quality husband certificate on his behalf. Bu we had to inform him that we cannot do such a thing."

[RossMac]

Can I get a new for old replacement on mine?

[silversun]

I once knew a bloke who tried to sue his ex after she broke up with him - he'd spent a lot of money on her apparently. Mind you, this was the same bloke that used to keep his mobile phone in his trouser pocket so he could get 'good vibrations' when it rang...

[JonRB]

Reminds me of the following Monty Python sketch:

Python said:

Man - Good morning. Registrar - Good morning. Man - Are you the registrar? Registrar - I have that function. Man - I was here on Saturday, getting married to a blonde girl, and I'd like to change please. I'd like to have this one instead please. Registrar - What do you mean? Man - Er, well, the other one wasn't any good, so I'd like to swap it for this one, please. Er, I have paid. I paid on Saturday. Here's the ticket. (gives him the marriage licence.) Registrar - Ah, oh, no. That was when you were married. Man - Er, yes. That was when I was married to the wrong one. I didn't like the colour. This is the one I want to have, so if you could just change the forms round I can take this one back with me now. Registrar - I can't do that. Man - Look, make it simpler, I'll pay again. Registrar - No, you can't do that. Man - Look, all I want you to do is change the wife, say the words, blah, blab, blah, back to my place, no questions asked. Registrar - I'm sorry sir, but we're not allowed to change. Man - You can at Harrods. Registrar - You can't. Man - You can. I changed my record player and there wasn't a grumble. Registrar - It's different. Man - And I changed my pet snake, and I changed my Robin Day tie. Registrar - Well, you can't change a bloody wife! Man - Oh, all right! Well, can I borrow one for the weekend. Registrar - No!