How to dump a girl...

[tonyhetherington]

Hi everyone....

Ok, just been having a discussion with a friend of mine as I'm looking for a serious way to say 'no' to a girl. Anyway, that's been and gone.

Of course, during that conversation we came up with a few funny ones! Not for the purpose of using them, simply funny ones.

So, people, please give me here funny ways to dump a girl.

I'll start you off with...

"hey babe, you know how you like buying the tesco's meal for one. the half a bottle of wine. the single yogurt packs. and those mushy dvd's?"

"yeah...?"

"keep buying them"

or

"hey babe...welcome to dumpsville....population...YOU"

[rico]

Goldie Lookin Chain - Sister

Absolutely cracking tune and relevent to this thread.

[Plotloss]

Move house and town one weekend without telling her.

The shame.

Seemed like a good idea at the time though.

[MikeyT]

"Hey babe?" How old are you? 18?

[wolves_wanderer]

"Everyone in a relationship step forward"
"Not so fast love"

[Munter]

In a text message I used "Your only redeeming feature is you breasts. Bye ugly".

But she still insists well over a year later in occasionally sending me messages.... So sad.

[timmy30]

Tell her your giving up your job to spend time finding yourself, but that because you'll have no income her wage will have to be enough for two.......

[krusty]

Munter said:

In a text message I used "Your only redeeming feature is you breasts. Bye ugly". But she still insists well over a year later in occasionally sending me messages.... So sad.

Ask her to send you a picture of her breasts as that's the only bit you're missing

[tonyhetherington]

wolves_wanderer said:

"Everyone in a relationship step forward" "Not so fast love"

That is BRILLIANT! I am cracking up at that

Everyone else...you are evil people!

[krusty]

Tony, you could always show her "that magazine cover" and let her make her own mind up

[tonyhetherington]

I like your thinking Krusty my man...

(but what if she has fit mates though? Would ruin my chances!)

[shadytree]

Tell her you're gay and prefer being penetrated.

[krusty]

Take 'em all on

[wedge girl]

tonyhetherington said:

I like your thinking Krusty my man... (but what if she has fit mates though? Would ruin my chances!)

That should improve your chances, as they will see you as a challenge and want to convert you.

[tonyhetherington]

shadytree said:

Tell her you're gay and prefer being penetrated.

I think we'll call that plan B

[D_Mike]

I'm pleased we haven't left the age of chivalry. Time was, if you got engaged to a girl (deliberately, or perhaps accidentally as our good pal Bertie Wooster did so often) then you pretty much had to resign yourself to a married life.

[lazyitus]

You "Wanna see a picture of my Ex ?"

Her "Yeah."

At this point, give her a vanity mirror.

[krusty]

Or resign yourself to the Best man "standing in"

[tonyhetherington]

engaged!?

I've had two dates with the girl!?

>> Edited by tonyhetherington on Tuesday 27th September 11:53

[timmy30]

tonyhetherington said:

shadytree said: Tell her you're gay and prefer being penetrated. I think we'll call that plan B

this could backfire badly if she whips out a strapon and takes you roughly from behind.