When in the month can you say :

[jacko lah]

Darling I think you should get to the doctors and have your PMT looked at.

I've kept a secret diary since january and every 28 days I am treated to the worst levels of verbal abuse, and it is rare that I am not invited to leave. This lasts on average 4 days. There are at least 8 days when I am GODs Gift to the world.

So 1) Am I allowed to point out this cycle.
2) If so, how best to approach it.

[nonegreen]

get her pissed first and pick your time

[morebeanz]

Doesn't sound right to me at all...



...should be in trouble for 8 days and God's gift for 4!

[tonto]

jacko lah said:

Darling I think you should get to the doctors and have your PMT looked at. I've kept a secret diary since january and every 28 days I am treated to the worst levels of verbal abuse, and it is rare that I am not invited to leave. This lasts on average 4 days. There are at least 8 days when I am GODs Gift to the world. So 1) Am I allowed to point out this cycle. 2) If so, how best to approach it.

Try mentioning it during the 8 'good' days.

[Taxi 4 Hutton]

jacko lah said:

2) If so, how best to approach it.

With Chocolate and Body armour

[AlexH]

tonto said:

Try mentioning it during the 8 'good' days.

And even then on the phone...

[mechsympathy]

jacko lah said:

There are at least 8 days when I am GODs Gift to the world.

I think you've answered your own question (Although you probably don't feel like rocking the boat when times are good.)

>>edit to add: looks like a consensus then

>>(And: probably best to do it before she finds the diary)

>> Edited by mechsympathy on Friday 9th September 13:13

[jacko lah]

nonegreen said:

get her pissed first and pick your time

That's usually when she wants sex so I prefer not to discuss the issue on that 1 night a year.

[mrs trackside]

I presume the PMT stops when her period starts?

Do it then, and show her the diary.

Be sure to bring gifts, such as chocolate (very importantly) and flowers.

[jacko lah]

May I ask if PMT is erm 'TREATABLE'

Like Could something be done ?

[jacko lah]

mrs trackside said:

I presume the PMT stops when her period starts? Do it then, and show her the diary. Be sure to bring gifts, such as chocolate (very importantly) and flowers.

About 3 hours before.

Best not to show the diary, it has all sorts of thoughts and feelings and rants and stuff, which is why it's at work in the bottom of my desk.

Chocolate ? Why does that work so well ?

[JonRB]

Work late / away on the "danger days"? Sounds like she's regular as clockwork, so should be easy to predict / plan for.

Otherwise phrases such as "I'm beyond caring what you say " or "like I give a shit" or "ok, I will leave then" might help.

Or not.

[Taxi 4 Hutton]

One a serious note......Every woman is different when it comes to PMT. There are lots of off the shelf remedies you can buy from boots etc,like evening primrose oil capsules, but the problem may be that if you actually buy them yourself and offer them to your Mrs, you may leave yourself open for an even greater amount of abuse. Us ladeez are sensitive souls when it comes to PMT . Yeah yeah and many other issues too, before you all say it

Certain types of contraceptive pill can alleviate the problem in some cases.

It seems like you may just have to bite the bullet and mention it to her (in a gentle way) during your 8 day ‘gods gift’ period (no pun intended). Being armed with chocolate and sympathy may help your cause.

[AlexH]

JonRB said:

Otherwise phrases such as "I'm beyond caring what you say " or "like I give a shit" or "ok, I will leave then" might help.

I've always found 'Talk to the hand...cos the face ain't listening' a personal favourite...particularly like wobbling your head like one of those black chicks on the US daytime chav showcase chatshows...

[jacko lah]

AlexH said:

JonRB said: Otherwise phrases such as "I'm beyond caring what you say " or "like I give a shit" or "ok, I will leave then" might help. I've always found 'Talk to the hand...cos the face ain't listening' a personal favourite...particularly like wobbling your head like one of those black chicks on the US daytime chav showcase chatshows...

or as my 14 year old neice once put it : Talk to the shoulder cause the hand can't be arsed.

Nice.

>> Edited by jacko lah on Friday 9th September 13:26

[Taxi 4 Hutton]

AlexH said:

JonRB said: Otherwise phrases such as "I'm beyond caring what you say " or "like I give a shit" or "ok, I will leave then" might help. I've always found 'Talk to the hand...cos the face ain't listening' a personal favourite...particularly like wobbling your head like one of those black chicks on the US daytime chav showcase chatshows...

Such a gent But the image of that is very very funny.

[nightmare]

Taxi 4 Hutton said:

With Chocolate and Body armour

brilliant!!

Jacko... there are quite a few things which can be used to treat severe PMT thesedays - and this sounds like the chemical changes here are fairly severe. bear in mind that decreasing the bad times will probably also decrease your godlike status at toher times!! Main recommendations include

increasing intake of vitamin B6 (but NOT large doses as it can be a problem)
taking evening primrose oil
taking magnesium and calium supplements

none of the above have any scientific trial data behind them and are more anecdotal than medical.

there are also many medical 'treatments' - though all treat symptoms, not cause, as no-one actually udnerstands what causes it - in your case this would mainly be anti-depressants or tranquilisers which personally I'd avoid until you'd tried other routes.

regular exercise is supposed to help (but then thats considered a cure-all for the whole world!)

She may actually be suffering from Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder - the emotional side of PMT (about 5% of women suffer from it) Ther is mroe that can be done if a GP identifies tis as the problem....

hope this helps a bit
Night

[Iria]

Taxi 4 Hutton said:

One a serious note......Every woman is different when it comes to PMT. There are lots of off the shelf remedies you can buy from boots etc,like evening primrose oil capsules, but the problem may be that if you actually buy them yourself and offer them to your Mrs, you may leave yourself open for an even greater amount of abuse. Us ladeez are sensitive souls when it comes to PMT . Yeah yeah and many other issues too, before you all say it Certain types of contraceptive pill can alleviate the problem in some cases. It seems like you may just have to bite the bullet and mention it to her (in a gentle way) during your 8 day ‘gods gift’ period (no pun intended). Being armed with chocolate and sympathy may help your cause.

Yupp... chocolate goodies help a lot. Contraceptive pill is one of the ways of sorting these cases, tends to make your humour vary but it makes PMT almost invisible (it got me depressed though). It is a bit too much if you get what seems like a lot of verbal abuse and so on and so forth, regardless of PMT. Underlying problems? Sometimes during your period you tend to speak your mind for better or worse (or so it says in the Always bag Going to the gym before and during your period helps prevent this bouts of bad temper since you burn it all there. Each woman suffers it in a different way, and their partners also!

[mrs trackside]

jacko lah said:

mrs trackside said: I presume the PMT stops when her period starts? Do it then, and show her the diary. Be sure to bring gifts, such as chocolate (very importantly) and flowers. About 3 hours before. Best not to show the diary, it has all sorts of thoughts and feelings and rants and stuff, which is why it's at work in the bottom of my desk. Chocolate ? Why does that work so well ?

Does SHE realise she's like this? I get PMT (which has gotten worse since I hit my 30s). At it's worst it lasts about a week and everything and everyone annoys me, but I don't get abusive (I don't think I do anyway), I just tell every one to fk off. I also become very clumsy and get emotional about stupid things. As someone else said, regular exercise does help.

When your girlfriend gets abusive, have you tried calmly asking her not to talk to you like that? She may not even realise she's doing it, which may sound strange to a bloke, but honestly, hormones can play havoc with our heads. It may also be that she knows she's doing it, but she can't stop it.

Also, the diary. You say it has thoughts, feelings and rants in it. Unless they are pertaining to what a hot little minx the new 18 year old secretary is in her spandex shorts and rubber stilettos, it may be the wake up your girlfriend needs if she refuses to acknowledge that she has a problem.


And chocolate works so well, because it does. Right? Now stop asking stupid questions and go buy some.


>> Edited by mrs trackside on Friday 9th September 13:41

[wedg1e]

I had a psychopathic wife like this. Trouble is, it seemed like she was having more bad days than good towards the end of our relationship, maybe the onset of the menopause? Surely two periods a month is wrong?

Anyway, like I gave a sh!t by then....