Things I hate.

[Mr E]

1) Popping nice fresh bread into the toaster and forgetting the last thing toasted (some days ago) were frozen waffles.

Excuse me. I need to deal with a fire alarm.

[DanBoy]

I hate smoke alarms.

I accept that one day a smoke alarm might save my life, but for the most part they're just a pain in the arse.

[planetdave]

Community patroller busybody bloody hitlers.

Why cant they use the money to get a proper copper on secondment?

[PatHeald]

planetdave said:

Community patroller busybody bloody hitlers. Why cant they use the money to get a proper copper on secondment?

I disagree.

They are pretty good at sweeping up the smackheads, alcoholics, village idiots and copulating chavs from the churchyard which is overlooked by our office.

They are a bit like a turbocharged park keeper.

[Chim Girl]

PatHeald said:

They are a bit like a turbocharged park keeper.

What a great description!

[sparkythecat]

DanBoy said:

I hate smoke alarms. I accept that one day a smoke alarm might save my life, but for the most part they're just a pain in the arse.

Smoke alarms must be a Jewish invention. They just won't let you cook bacon.

[mybrainhurts]

Forty five minutes, and no word from MrE......

Did anybody call the fire brigade.....?

[planetdave]

PatHeald said:

planetdave said: Community patroller busybody bloody hitlers. Why cant they use the money to get a proper copper on secondment? I disagree. They are pretty good at sweeping up the smackheads, alcoholics, village idiots and copulating chavs from the churchyard which is overlooked by our office. They are a bit like a turbocharged park keeper.

A park keeper with the powers of arrest. Same job - as specified by the council - but manned by blokes with tits on their heads.

[JagLover]

planetdave said:

Community patroller busybody bloody hitlers. Why cant they use the money to get a proper copper on secondment?

They are cheaper than police officers and fulfil many of the functions of a 'beat' police officer.

[UKbob]

Reminds me, I had to shove mine under the couch cushions last night, cheers

edit... my smoke alarm that is

>> Edited by UKbob on Friday 26th August 08:40

[r988]

DanBoy said:

I accept that one day a smoke alarm might save my life, but for the most part they're just a pain in the arse.

Your actually supposed to put them on the ceiling...

[Mr E]

mybrainhurts said:

Forty five minutes, and no word from MrE...... Did anybody call the fire brigade.....?

PMSL.

No, I made more toast, drank a beer, while watching QI and retired to bed.

But I thank the gentlemen for his concern.

[shadowninja]

r988 said:

DanBoy said: I accept that one day a smoke alarm might save my life, but for the most part they're just a pain in the arse. Your actually supposed to put them on the ceiling...

There's always one.

ya beat me to it!

[chris watton]

I hate the adverts being 10 times louder than the program you're watching!

[v15ben]

DanBoy said:

I hate smoke alarms.

I could rant about this all day! If you didn't have one, or it was turned off and your house burned to the ground, you would burn to death with it! They may sound annoying, but they are more than a bit useful when needed!
End of rant

[wiggy001]

I'm so laid back, my smoke alarm has a snooze button...

[timmy30]

Tax.

I hate having to pay bloody tax.

[pdV6]

chris watton said:

I hate the adverts being 10 times louder than the program you're watching!

[neil_cardiff]

pdV6 said:

chris watton said: I hate the adverts being 10 times louder than the program you're watching!

Surely me and you (and I guess, Numbnuts) need that? We wouldn't want to miss out on our Loreal products would we?

For those who don't know, or simply don't care - we're deaf gits

>> Edited by neil_cardiff on Friday 26th August 15:46

[pdV6]

Speaking of smoke alarms, ours are wired into the mains. Thought there was something seriously wrong with 'em the 1st time I set one off...

BBQ had run on into the night and there were sausages left to cook but no charcoal left and nobody sober enough to drive to a 24h petrol station. No problem; stick 'em under the grill instead!

Anyway. Promptly forgot about them, only to be reminded by the smoke alarm going off. Rescued the meat, jumped on a chair to silence the alarm...




...and the entire street lost power.


Turns out a street lamp had shorted out and started to smoulder, so the electricity board had cut power to the street whilst effecting a repair (didn't think to tell anybody). Just happened to be at the exact moment I pressed the button on the smoke alarm. Spooky.