AAAAAAARGH! RANT RANT RANT!
Discussion
Dear Ted - please accept my apologies if I wear out the ":censored:" smily during this thread...
The background - My wife and I (both English) live in Los Angeles. For the past few months my wife has been working in Atlanta temporarily, so flys there during the week and back to LA at weekends. I'm in England where I'll be for a few months. We're in the process of moving apartments which is kinda difficult when neither of us is in LA, so my wife HAS to fly back to LA this weekend to pack up the apartment and put our cats into a cattery for a month as our lease is up on our current apartment at the beginning of next week and someone else is waiting to move in, and our new apartment won't be ready for a month.
So far, not a problem. A pain in the arse for my wife, but not a problem. Then Delta Airlines decide to cancel BOTH the flights my wife is supposed to be on this weekend. She was supposed to fly to LA last night, and fly back to Atlanta tomorrow. My wife finds out that the flights have been cancelled at the airport 30 minutes before she is due to fly. They managed to get her on alternative flights (First class as compensation) - flying to LA Saturday morning and flying back to Atlanta Saturday evening, which'll give her about 6 hours to:
1. Get rental car.
2. Drive to the apartment (about 1 hour away on a good day. This is LA. There is never a good day in LA traffic).
3. Find the cats. There should be two.
4. Take p:censored:d off cats to vets for inoculations that they need if they are to stay in a cattery.
5. Take VERY p:censored:d off cats to cattery.
6. Hire truck from U-Haul.
7. Load entire contents of apartment (fortunately already packed into boxes. Mostly.) into truck.
8. Unload contents of truck into temporary rented storage.
9. Return truck.
10. Drive to LAX.
11. Return rental car.
12. Get through airport security and onto return flight.
As you can imagine, when my wife found out about this last night she was not in the best of moods. She was in an even worse mood when, on her way back from Atlanta airport after a wasted journey, some utter f:censored:kwit decided to run a red light and turn across the path of my wife, who was doing 50mph at the time.
At this point I'd like to thank Mazda for making MX5's a lot stronger than you'd think, and for giving them excellent brakes.
With my wife still in the remains of her car, the f:censored:kwit (sadly unhurt) gets out of his car, walks up to my wife and screams abuse at her, accusing her of jumping a red light.
At this point I'd like to thank the two rather large gentlemen from the car who narrowly avoided the accident for calling the police and paramedics, for restraining the f:censored:kwit until the police arrived, and for corroborating my wife's story.
After getting checked out by paramedics, who want her to spend the night in hospital as a precaution but give her the all-clear after hearing the story-so-far (with a warning that she's "not gonna feel too good tomorrow"), and sorting out the confusion surrounding her insurance (Car owners in Georgia have all their insurance details recorded on a computer database which the police have access to - my wife's car is registered in California but has temporary Georgia licence plates so her insurance details didn't show up) my wife is allowed to go home - amazingly in a courtesy car that her insurance company have delivered to the scene of the accident!
(time for an intermission - cue crappy music and kids pestering their parents for overpriced icecream...)
After about 4 hours sleep my wife gets to the airport in Atlanta. So far so good. Through security without a problem. The plane takes off on time. She even gets some sleep on the flight. The plane lands at LAX on time. She gets off the plane, and the fun begins again...
As my wife gets off the plane, she is met by a couple of armed Federal Aviation Authority agents and asked to follow them. She asks what the problem is - they reply "Don't worry, you're not under arrest - yet...".
My wife : "I'm not going any further unless you tell me what the problem is."
Agent : "Is your name ..........." (a name similar to my wifes)
My wife : "No."
Agent : "Can I see some ID please?"
My wife hands ID to Agent.
Agent : "Your name IS ......... - why did you lie to me?"
My wife : "Huh? No it's not - look..."
My wife points out difference in name.
Agent : "The name we got originally must be wrong - come with us while we check."
My wife : "What am I supposed to have done wrong?"
So the two agents march my wife off to a holding area without answering her question. After checking, they decide she is the person they need to speak to. They return with her flight itinerary and details of every flight she has been on for the past year. Apparently she has been reported to the FAA by Delta Airways for having a "suspicious flying record".
My wife explains that she is English (hence the overseas flights), lives in LA but works temporarily in Atlanta during the week.
Agent : "So why do you live in LA if you work in Atlanta?"
My wife : "As I just said, it's a temporary position."
My wife starts rubbing her neck, which by now is really starting to ache as a result of the previous night's car accident. One of the agents notices, and asks if there is anything wrong. She explains about the accident on the way back from the airport.
Agent : "So if you flew yesterday, why don't we have a record of it?"
My wife explains about the flight cancellations.
Agent : "So why fly back just for a few hours?"
My wife explains about the cats/moving/packing fiasco.
Agent : "You'll never get all that done in a few hours - why didn't you fly here yesterday?"
My wife : "Have you been listening to anything I've said?"
Agent : "I need to confirm this with the airline"
Both agents leave and return again a few minutes later.
Agent : "Everything checks out - you can go."
My wife : "Good."
The agents escort my wife to baggage claim. My wife says she doesn't have any bags and starts to walk away.
Agent : "Hang on - why don't you have to get any bags?"
My wife : "I don't have to get any bags because I'm only supposed to be here for a few hours. You know this because I've told you repeatedly. You also know that I have an apartment here and I work in Atlanta, so it's safe to assume I can fit everything important in my hand luggage and leave clothes at my apartment here in LA and the hotel I'm staying at in Atlanta. Do you have any more stupid questions or can I leave now?"
Agent : "I think we should escort you to your car. Where are you parked?"
My wife (who has just realised what she has said and to whom) : "I'm sorry. I'm not parked anywhere - I have to hire a car"
Agent : "Rental comanies aren't on airport property - we can't come with you. Have a nice day."
My wife finally gets to leave the airport - only 30 minutes later than she should have. Fortunately there are no problems renting the car, and no problems with the journey to the apartment. On arrival at the apartment, both cats are present. Both cats are enticed into pet carriers with a minimum of fuss and bloodloss. Things appear to be running smoothly again...
(another intermission - more crappy music, kids throwing up after eating too much icecream)
... until my wife gets to the vets for their appointment. An appointment that was booked a week ago and at which time it was explained exactly what innoculations they would need and why they needed them. Unsurprisingly, the vets are running late. 30 minutes later, with the cats now ready to claw off the fingers of the first person to go near them, the vet is ready. My wife takes the two mewing demons into the vets office. The vet, with an almost sincere look on his face, asks "so why are these two delightful furballs here today?"
My wife : "For the innoculations they need so they can go into a cattery this afternoon."
The expression on the vets face changes, and not in a good way.
My wife, whose expression also changed : "I told you what innoculations they need when I made the appointment a week ago."
Vet : "Ah. Unfortunately we don't have any of those innoculations left."
The US Geological Survey have a website that shows the location and size of recent earthquakes in the Los Angeles area. It appears that the earthquake sensors wern't working for a few minutes this afternoon, or they would have picked up the seismic event that occured approx 15 miles north northwest of Los Angeles a fraction of a second after the vet finished saying the word "left". The "conversation" went something like this:
My wife : ":censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored:"
Vet: "..."
My wife : ":censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored:"
Vet: "..."
My wife : ":censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored:"
Vet: "..."
My wife : "Right! I'll just have to fly them to Atlanta with me!"
Vet : "Err... if your cats are to be transported to a different state then they need certificates to say that they are healthy enough to travel, and that they have had the required innoculations..."
By this point the cats have stopped complaining and are watching intently...
My glaring wife : "What innoculations?"
Vet : "As long as they are healthy they just need rabies innoculations - we have plenty of those..."
The cats, sensing an impending trip to the local furriers if they cause a fuss, are perfectly well behaved as the vet examines them. They are given a clean bill of health, and don't even flinch as the vet gives them the rabies innoculations while my wife phones the airline to see if she have have two cats fly to Atlanta with her...
(Intermission. Music. Kids. Icecream. Vomit.)
The Man From Del-Ta, He Say "YESSSSS!" providing you can get them to the Delta Airlines cargo loading bay within the next hour, and by the way you'll need to buy two more pet carriers as the ones you've got aren't approved for airline cargo usage. Fortunately a local pet store has exactly the right carriers. Tranferring the (by now angry again) cats from one carrier to another proves to be, er, entertaining. Fortunately the woman in the pet store claims to know a good plastic surgeon. There is now 45 minutes left to get to the Delta cargo bay at LAX.
90 minutes later, after phoning Delta and pleading with them to still allow the cats on the plane, my wife arrives at the cargo bay. They are expecting her and the cats - they can fly on the next flight, but first there's all this paperwork to be filled out...
Delta Rep : "Who's collecting the cats in Atlanta?"
My wife : "I am!"
Delta Rep looks at his watch : "You're very late - I don't think you'll have enough time to get on the flight..."
As I type this my wife has just returned the rental car. The company we rent our apartment from will put our furniture into storage - we'll lose our security deposit, and they'll charge us a small fortune for storage, but we are past caring. All my wife has left to do is get on the flight. Check-in closes in 10 minutes. The buses from the rental company run every 10 minutes. I'm off to have several beers and wait for my wife to phone...
The background - My wife and I (both English) live in Los Angeles. For the past few months my wife has been working in Atlanta temporarily, so flys there during the week and back to LA at weekends. I'm in England where I'll be for a few months. We're in the process of moving apartments which is kinda difficult when neither of us is in LA, so my wife HAS to fly back to LA this weekend to pack up the apartment and put our cats into a cattery for a month as our lease is up on our current apartment at the beginning of next week and someone else is waiting to move in, and our new apartment won't be ready for a month.
So far, not a problem. A pain in the arse for my wife, but not a problem. Then Delta Airlines decide to cancel BOTH the flights my wife is supposed to be on this weekend. She was supposed to fly to LA last night, and fly back to Atlanta tomorrow. My wife finds out that the flights have been cancelled at the airport 30 minutes before she is due to fly. They managed to get her on alternative flights (First class as compensation) - flying to LA Saturday morning and flying back to Atlanta Saturday evening, which'll give her about 6 hours to:
1. Get rental car.
2. Drive to the apartment (about 1 hour away on a good day. This is LA. There is never a good day in LA traffic).
3. Find the cats. There should be two.
4. Take p:censored:d off cats to vets for inoculations that they need if they are to stay in a cattery.
5. Take VERY p:censored:d off cats to cattery.
6. Hire truck from U-Haul.
7. Load entire contents of apartment (fortunately already packed into boxes. Mostly.) into truck.
8. Unload contents of truck into temporary rented storage.
9. Return truck.
10. Drive to LAX.
11. Return rental car.
12. Get through airport security and onto return flight.
As you can imagine, when my wife found out about this last night she was not in the best of moods. She was in an even worse mood when, on her way back from Atlanta airport after a wasted journey, some utter f:censored:kwit decided to run a red light and turn across the path of my wife, who was doing 50mph at the time.
At this point I'd like to thank Mazda for making MX5's a lot stronger than you'd think, and for giving them excellent brakes.
With my wife still in the remains of her car, the f:censored:kwit (sadly unhurt) gets out of his car, walks up to my wife and screams abuse at her, accusing her of jumping a red light.
At this point I'd like to thank the two rather large gentlemen from the car who narrowly avoided the accident for calling the police and paramedics, for restraining the f:censored:kwit until the police arrived, and for corroborating my wife's story.
After getting checked out by paramedics, who want her to spend the night in hospital as a precaution but give her the all-clear after hearing the story-so-far (with a warning that she's "not gonna feel too good tomorrow"), and sorting out the confusion surrounding her insurance (Car owners in Georgia have all their insurance details recorded on a computer database which the police have access to - my wife's car is registered in California but has temporary Georgia licence plates so her insurance details didn't show up) my wife is allowed to go home - amazingly in a courtesy car that her insurance company have delivered to the scene of the accident!
(time for an intermission - cue crappy music and kids pestering their parents for overpriced icecream...)
After about 4 hours sleep my wife gets to the airport in Atlanta. So far so good. Through security without a problem. The plane takes off on time. She even gets some sleep on the flight. The plane lands at LAX on time. She gets off the plane, and the fun begins again...
As my wife gets off the plane, she is met by a couple of armed Federal Aviation Authority agents and asked to follow them. She asks what the problem is - they reply "Don't worry, you're not under arrest - yet...".
My wife : "I'm not going any further unless you tell me what the problem is."
Agent : "Is your name ..........." (a name similar to my wifes)
My wife : "No."
Agent : "Can I see some ID please?"
My wife hands ID to Agent.
Agent : "Your name IS ......... - why did you lie to me?"
My wife : "Huh? No it's not - look..."
My wife points out difference in name.
Agent : "The name we got originally must be wrong - come with us while we check."
My wife : "What am I supposed to have done wrong?"
So the two agents march my wife off to a holding area without answering her question. After checking, they decide she is the person they need to speak to. They return with her flight itinerary and details of every flight she has been on for the past year. Apparently she has been reported to the FAA by Delta Airways for having a "suspicious flying record".
My wife explains that she is English (hence the overseas flights), lives in LA but works temporarily in Atlanta during the week.
Agent : "So why do you live in LA if you work in Atlanta?"
My wife : "As I just said, it's a temporary position."
My wife starts rubbing her neck, which by now is really starting to ache as a result of the previous night's car accident. One of the agents notices, and asks if there is anything wrong. She explains about the accident on the way back from the airport.
Agent : "So if you flew yesterday, why don't we have a record of it?"
My wife explains about the flight cancellations.
Agent : "So why fly back just for a few hours?"
My wife explains about the cats/moving/packing fiasco.
Agent : "You'll never get all that done in a few hours - why didn't you fly here yesterday?"
My wife : "Have you been listening to anything I've said?"
Agent : "I need to confirm this with the airline"
Both agents leave and return again a few minutes later.
Agent : "Everything checks out - you can go."
My wife : "Good."
The agents escort my wife to baggage claim. My wife says she doesn't have any bags and starts to walk away.
Agent : "Hang on - why don't you have to get any bags?"
My wife : "I don't have to get any bags because I'm only supposed to be here for a few hours. You know this because I've told you repeatedly. You also know that I have an apartment here and I work in Atlanta, so it's safe to assume I can fit everything important in my hand luggage and leave clothes at my apartment here in LA and the hotel I'm staying at in Atlanta. Do you have any more stupid questions or can I leave now?"
Agent : "I think we should escort you to your car. Where are you parked?"
My wife (who has just realised what she has said and to whom) : "I'm sorry. I'm not parked anywhere - I have to hire a car"
Agent : "Rental comanies aren't on airport property - we can't come with you. Have a nice day."
My wife finally gets to leave the airport - only 30 minutes later than she should have. Fortunately there are no problems renting the car, and no problems with the journey to the apartment. On arrival at the apartment, both cats are present. Both cats are enticed into pet carriers with a minimum of fuss and bloodloss. Things appear to be running smoothly again...
(another intermission - more crappy music, kids throwing up after eating too much icecream)
... until my wife gets to the vets for their appointment. An appointment that was booked a week ago and at which time it was explained exactly what innoculations they would need and why they needed them. Unsurprisingly, the vets are running late. 30 minutes later, with the cats now ready to claw off the fingers of the first person to go near them, the vet is ready. My wife takes the two mewing demons into the vets office. The vet, with an almost sincere look on his face, asks "so why are these two delightful furballs here today?"
My wife : "For the innoculations they need so they can go into a cattery this afternoon."
The expression on the vets face changes, and not in a good way.
My wife, whose expression also changed : "I told you what innoculations they need when I made the appointment a week ago."
Vet : "Ah. Unfortunately we don't have any of those innoculations left."
The US Geological Survey have a website that shows the location and size of recent earthquakes in the Los Angeles area. It appears that the earthquake sensors wern't working for a few minutes this afternoon, or they would have picked up the seismic event that occured approx 15 miles north northwest of Los Angeles a fraction of a second after the vet finished saying the word "left". The "conversation" went something like this:
My wife : ":censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored:"
Vet: "..."
My wife : ":censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored:"
Vet: "..."
My wife : ":censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored: :censored:"
Vet: "..."
My wife : "Right! I'll just have to fly them to Atlanta with me!"
Vet : "Err... if your cats are to be transported to a different state then they need certificates to say that they are healthy enough to travel, and that they have had the required innoculations..."
By this point the cats have stopped complaining and are watching intently...
My glaring wife : "What innoculations?"
Vet : "As long as they are healthy they just need rabies innoculations - we have plenty of those..."
The cats, sensing an impending trip to the local furriers if they cause a fuss, are perfectly well behaved as the vet examines them. They are given a clean bill of health, and don't even flinch as the vet gives them the rabies innoculations while my wife phones the airline to see if she have have two cats fly to Atlanta with her...
(Intermission. Music. Kids. Icecream. Vomit.)
The Man From Del-Ta, He Say "YESSSSS!" providing you can get them to the Delta Airlines cargo loading bay within the next hour, and by the way you'll need to buy two more pet carriers as the ones you've got aren't approved for airline cargo usage. Fortunately a local pet store has exactly the right carriers. Tranferring the (by now angry again) cats from one carrier to another proves to be, er, entertaining. Fortunately the woman in the pet store claims to know a good plastic surgeon. There is now 45 minutes left to get to the Delta cargo bay at LAX.
90 minutes later, after phoning Delta and pleading with them to still allow the cats on the plane, my wife arrives at the cargo bay. They are expecting her and the cats - they can fly on the next flight, but first there's all this paperwork to be filled out...
Delta Rep : "Who's collecting the cats in Atlanta?"
My wife : "I am!"
Delta Rep looks at his watch : "You're very late - I don't think you'll have enough time to get on the flight..."
As I type this my wife has just returned the rental car. The company we rent our apartment from will put our furniture into storage - we'll lose our security deposit, and they'll charge us a small fortune for storage, but we are past caring. All my wife has left to do is get on the flight. Check-in closes in 10 minutes. The buses from the rental company run every 10 minutes. I'm off to have several beers and wait for my wife to phone...
king Hell!!!!! Very sorry to hear about the crappy time she had. Sadly, this is no longer the land of the free, it is the land of the little Hitlers, petty rules, and complete misunderstanding of the fact that free people might do things that do not fit into a simple category.
In New York, it is no bettter than the sad story you relate.
Yet still, the sadly deluded people here think that they are the "most free" country on the planet.
In New York, it is no bettter than the sad story you relate.
Yet still, the sadly deluded people here think that they are the "most free" country on the planet.
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