How Many 5 Year olds.....
How Many 5 Year olds.....
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neil.b

Original Poster:

6,546 posts

276 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
You're in the middle of an arena. You're being attacked by 5 year olds who will stop at nothing to kill you. How many can you take on before they overcome you?

http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/showflat.php?Cat=&Number=1556673&page=0&view=collapsed&sb=9&o=14&vc=1

Fer

7,773 posts

309 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
I don't even want to start to imagine how you found this thread!

neil.b

Original Poster:

6,546 posts

276 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
There's some awesome quotes on it;

"Are you allowed to use one the kids to wield at other kids ala a sword?

It is not hard at all to swing them around and if so then i have a feeling you could just swing around in a little circle and knock them all out as they get close to you. "

Priceless!

superflid

2,254 posts

294 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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Disturbing film (from the 70's?) "Would you kill a child".

Anyone remember it?

BrianTheYank

7,585 posts

279 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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Great question ever!

JagLover

46,737 posts

264 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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Ok lets start the ball rolling-assuming that they have no special training I say , 40

opieoilman

4,408 posts

265 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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I am going to give it ago this evening, I will let you know how I get on.

Cheers

Guy.

justayellowbadge

37,057 posts

271 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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Love the question (regarding using the kids as weapons) -

'Can I freeze the 5 year olds so they'll sting more?'

BrianTheYank

7,585 posts

279 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
JagLover said:
Ok lets start the ball rolling-assuming that they have no special training I say , 40


40 at least. Probably upwards of 50+ easily.
Even if there are tons of kids only about 10 of em could grab you at once.

JagLover

46,737 posts

264 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
BrianTheYank said:

JagLover said:
Ok lets start the ball rolling-assuming that they have no special training I say , 40



40 at least. Probably upwards of 50+ easily.
Even if there are tons of kids only about 10 of em could grab you at once.


We have to working on the assumption that they are blood crazed-kind of like the zombie children in RE2

BrianTheYank

7,585 posts

279 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
5yo's are fragile as shit, and one hit from any adult would knock them out most likely. What could they honestly do to knock you out anyways? You would have to be completely pinned to the ground for them to have any chance at all.

superflid

2,254 posts

294 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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My 3 year old son put me on the floor.....

Smacked me straight in the goolies the day after my vasectomy

BrianTheYank

7,585 posts

279 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
superflid said:
My 3 year old son put me on the floor.....

Smacked me straight in the goolies the day after my vasectomy


the original post said a cup would be worn so the crotch shots would be ineffective.

sirtophamhat

1,072 posts

267 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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with no crotch shos the number would be high, and as you say, they can't all be on you at once. I think once you got over the idea of thumping a five year old it would become a matter of stamina more than anything else. Can you land fifty consecutive knockout blows, while being swarmed at the same time?

I like this guy:
Alobar on the other site said:
Someday when I'm uber rich I'm gunna buy a [censored] load of 5 year olds on the black market and try this out

superflid

2,254 posts

294 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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BrianTheYank said:

superflid said:
My 3 year old son put me on the floor.....

Smacked me straight in the goolies the day after my vasectomy



the original post said a cup would be worn so the crotch shots would be ineffective.


I'd assume it wouldn't be done the day after surgery either.

nervous

24,050 posts

259 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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tell you what: im running a contest for over 200 of the little darlings tommorow. lets have your bets and ill test it out and report back.

to allow you to fully evaluate all the criteria they will be relativley grumpy and assertive cos theyre working on a 'day off' (ha!) BUT there will be Sunny Delight at snack time. and we know what that means.

lets have your guesses, standard fictional-kid-attack-on-a-basketball-court rules apply.

for a kick off, i reckon i could take 15 before they did for me.

BrianTheYank

7,585 posts

279 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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I hope your not serious............I mean, 15 only? you little girl

nervous

24,050 posts

259 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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no, seriously. i know what the little bast*rds are capable of. make them race around all day building some hugeley challenging structure and then tell them they didnt all win. youll see that, although they look cute, theyre actually miniature gift wrapped buckets of malevolence.

and im 6 foot 4 and built like a brick latrine. and have several black belts. and a brown one to go with my jeans.

know your enemy my friend. and be afraid, be very afraid.

BrianTheYank

7,585 posts

279 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
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With that build and training you oughta be able to easily take down more than 15.
I play football(american) all the time with my little bro and his friends who are 8-12 and I can carry 7-10 of em across the whole field while there clawing and kicking and hitting me. All day too. Im not very big either.

And a question for those that may not know- Do children that young produce adrenaline? If the dont it could make a huge difference when you get that rush and they dont.

nervous

24,050 posts

259 months

Thursday 24th March 2005
quotequote all
yes they do. AND they dont get the rapid build up of lactic acid that we do that causes muscles to get tired almost immediatley in non-lilliputians. plus, lets not forget the Sunny D factor.

what have you then folks? i dont mind getting fired if its all the name of good science...
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