things that make you go 'ouch'
Discussion
Just got back from a nice 3day stay in hospital...
Decided to quickly change a lightbulb on saturday lunchtime. Had just collected my brand spankers Civic Type R, so we were going to go out for a little run shortly.
Antway, as I stepped off the chair (Yeah,yeah, I know....) it tipped up anf I landed on the inverted leg. With the bottom of my kneecap.
It turns out( after my wife and son had got me to hospital in the back of her golf) that I had ripped the tendon off my patella, causimg the upper kneecap tendon to pull it about 3 inches up my thigh.
3 weeks in a full leg plaster with weeks of physio afterwards.
Good news is the chair is undamaged, jeans are fine and the lightbulb is still working.
Although it seemed serious at the time, I am sure I am just a beginner against the talent on PH.
Decided to quickly change a lightbulb on saturday lunchtime. Had just collected my brand spankers Civic Type R, so we were going to go out for a little run shortly.
Antway, as I stepped off the chair (Yeah,yeah, I know....) it tipped up anf I landed on the inverted leg. With the bottom of my kneecap.
It turns out( after my wife and son had got me to hospital in the back of her golf) that I had ripped the tendon off my patella, causimg the upper kneecap tendon to pull it about 3 inches up my thigh.
3 weeks in a full leg plaster with weeks of physio afterwards.
Good news is the chair is undamaged, jeans are fine and the lightbulb is still working.
Although it seemed serious at the time, I am sure I am just a beginner against the talent on PH.
The gringo builders my parents got in to do their driveway put a new man-hole cover on which was sightly too small for the opening. As I walked over it the thing fell in on an angle and got jarred with one corner pointing upwards. My sacks were the only things between my entire body weight and that acute lump of metal. I spoke like one of the chipmonks for the next week.
My brother in law was running a cross country race, decided on a short cut, over an iron fence with the spikes in the top (fool) and by by bollock! Allegedly it was still hanging on the spike till someone dared to take it off.
He has managed to have kids though so he is still firing live rounds.
He has managed to have kids though so he is still firing live rounds.
dick dastardly said:
The gringo builders my parents got in to do their driveway put a new man-hole cover on which was sightly too small for the opening. As I walked over it the thing fell in on an angle and got jarred with one corner pointing upwards. My sacks were the only things between my entire body weight and that acute lump of metal. I spoke like one of the chipmonks for the next week.
Sorry but nearly chocked on my apple reading that.
Must have been nasty..sorry.
dick dastardly said:
The gringo builders my parents got in to do their driveway put a new man-hole cover on which was sightly too small for the opening. As I walked over it the thing fell in on an angle and got jarred with one corner pointing upwards. My sacks were the only things between my entire body weight and that acute lump of metal. I spoke like one of the chipmonks for the next week.
Sorry I mean 
The most painful thing I've done was misjudging the last step of our staircase and putting my entire body weight on the tip of my right foot. This twisted my foot 120 degrees round the wrong way resulting in a bad sprain. Worst yet, a week into the recovery I did the same again, on the same ankle
5 weeks of physio and ultrasonic treatment later it was fixed. Never been the same since though On the knee thing I was run over by an off road kart 10 years ago. upright to 17 stone flying through the air in 1/4 second.
Thought I'd done nothing more than strained something and grazed the back of my neck on the rear tyre on the way down.
A week later, feeling no so good, I went to see my osteopath who told my I'd dislocated it! nice bloke poped it back into place there and then. Took 6 months to get 90% right.
Least it wasn't me nuts though...
Thought I'd done nothing more than strained something and grazed the back of my neck on the rear tyre on the way down.
A week later, feeling no so good, I went to see my osteopath who told my I'd dislocated it! nice bloke poped it back into place there and then. Took 6 months to get 90% right.
Least it wasn't me nuts though...
When my Dad was but a nipper he was trying to climb over one of the ver same steel railings mentioned earlier with spikes on top. Slipped and impaled himself an inch from his heart (didn't come out the back though). Managed to push himself off and get home so my Gran could get him to hospital. Still has a nice scar there now.
My most painfull experiance was when I had an operation to fix an ingrowing toenail. The doctors plan was to take either side of my nail off, leaving a strip in the middle, then to cut through the toe and scrape the root out. It was all to be done under local aneasthetic and after a week of taking painkillers and walking around the house with a big bandage on all should have been well.
The anesthetic was administered, and after a short delay to allow it to take effect, she set to work. However, the anesthetic wasnt working and as she set about butchering my toe it hurt. A lot.
The anesthetic was administered, and after a short delay to allow it to take effect, she set to work. However, the anesthetic wasnt working and as she set about butchering my toe it hurt. A lot.
Last christmas while trying to get a pressie of the top of a built in wardrobe I jumped up to grab it and my kneecap hit the bottom shelf on the way back down. The shelf was about 6 inches above my knee. From the pain I had, it felt like it been pushed that far up my leg! Fortunately after I stopped feeling very faint and sickly there was no permanent damage.
Hope you're feeling better soon and it doesn't spoil christmas for you.
Hope you're feeling better soon and it doesn't spoil christmas for you.
c c said:
The gringo builders my parents got in to do their driveway put a new man-hole cover on which was sightly too small for the opening. As I walked over it the thing fell in on an angle and got jarred with one corner pointing upwards. My sacks were the only things between my entire body weight and that acute lump of metal. I spoke like one of the chipmonks for the next week.
Sorry but nearly chocked on my apple reading that.
Must have been nasty..sorry.
Choked on my apple- some sort of double entendre perchance??
Had a mate at uni who got a kick in the pods playing footie, and ended up having to have one surgically removed from between his pelvic bones.
Another lad I was at uni with played rugby for Northampton and Scotland, and I heard he had one removed after being stamped/stood on.
:weep:
whoateallthepies said:
dick dastardly said:
The gringo builders my parents got in to do their driveway put a new man-hole cover on which was sightly too small for the opening. As I walked over it the thing fell in on an angle and got jarred with one corner pointing upwards. My sacks were the only things between my entire body weight and that acute lump of metal. I spoke like one of the chipmonks for the next week.
Sorry but nearly chocked on my apple reading that.
Must have been nasty..sorry.
Choked on my apple- some sort of double entendre perchance??
Had a mate at uni who got a kick in the pods playing footie, and ended up having to have one surgically removed from between his pelvic bones.
Another lad I was at uni with played rugby for Northampton and Scotland, and I heard he had one removed after being stamped/stood on.
:weep:
I'm wincing while I'm reading this
Currently have sticky tape holding the end of my right forefinger together after I gashed it on a raggy piece of steel.
By the time I got home the end 1" of my finger was numb, so I used a needle to fish around in the blood clot and dig out the flap of skin that had folded in on itself.
Oddly enough, it hurt more after I'd 'fixed' it than it did before.
Yes, I know it's hardly eye-watering stuff...
but I did say 'Ow' or words to that effect.
An uncle of mine leapt over a barbed-wire fence and caught his wedding ring, which pulled his finger off....
A mate did a similar thing but managed to stop before it had unrolled the flesh from the bone. The medics rolled it back down and stitched it up...
By the time I got home the end 1" of my finger was numb, so I used a needle to fish around in the blood clot and dig out the flap of skin that had folded in on itself.
Oddly enough, it hurt more after I'd 'fixed' it than it did before.
Yes, I know it's hardly eye-watering stuff...
but I did say 'Ow' or words to that effect. An uncle of mine leapt over a barbed-wire fence and caught his wedding ring, which pulled his finger off....
A mate did a similar thing but managed to stop before it had unrolled the flesh from the bone. The medics rolled it back down and stitched it up...
whoateallthepies said:
Had a mate at uni who got a kick in the pods playing footie, and ended up having to have one surgically removed from between his pelvic bones.
Another lad I was at uni with played rugby for Northampton and Scotland, and I heard he had one removed after being stamped/stood on.
:weep:
Wasn't that Budge Poutney?? I think he quit from Scotland when he had just lost one of his plums and the SRFU told him to buy his own tie.
One of my mates was playing in a county trial and one of the guys got his nutsack ripped open & both nuts fell out. Apparently he was ok until one of the medics moved and he could see what happened to the family jewels. He didn't lose them but was out of "action" for a couple of months.
Got tendonitis in my wrist after a bout of stylish indoor karting (the pimply faced youth running the show was condescending about how rear wheel drive works, I'd tipped up in an RX7 Twin Turbo, there was a point to be made).
Within 2 days I was unable to turn my wrist without going hot then cold and the sky fading from my view.
Just you try turning up at a car dealership with a wrist injury!
Within 2 days I was unable to turn my wrist without going hot then cold and the sky fading from my view.
Just you try turning up at a car dealership with a wrist injury!
On CCF (Combined Cadet Forces) field camp a fried of mine and the section were doing an exercise, which involved gathering mock artillery pieces from a large crater. The point was to retrieve them without a sniper firing blanks shooting at you. Well My good South African friend decided to run down the crater, at full speed and ran into a barbed wire and wooden frame fence. That was the last re-enactment of the Somme he did that day
Gassing Station | The Pie & Piston Archive | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff