Discussion
Hi everyone
So me and my missus have been in oz for nearly a month. We've only got a 1 year visa, and we're living with her folks in Adelaide at the moment.
So I've got through Xmas and new year, we had her 3 sister and 2 of there b/fs stay here too and it's been a good time, but saying goodbye to one couple last night as they head back to uk really hit me hard. I've spoken to my mum a few times on Skype but barely spoken to dad and I miss them a lot. It's also dawned on me that I will have to face a lot of ready and sad goodbyes if I wanted to live here permenently. I also hate the prospect of my parents not seeing grand kids regularly.
Anyway, we've been in Adelaide for 2 weeks after a week in Melbourne. The weather in Adelaide has been mid to high 30's and 40 a couple if days. After leaving frosty England, it's taken some real getting used to.
I've felt really homesick over the last few days. Me and OH have had few petty squabbles which has not helped. I know I need to MTFU up and get through the next few weeks and hopefully it will get better.
I really need a job of some sort. The days are dragging at the moment and I need something else to focus my mind on away from the uk.
I'm finding oz a bit weird at the moment. There doesn't seem like much of a community feel to the places I've been to. There doesn't seem like much to do apart from shopping or the beach. It's far too hot for soccer or golf or any sort of outdoor hobby. I'm still converting prices back to pounds, so I'm also thinking everything is well overpriced. 8 or 9$ for a beer has stung when out over Xmas.
I hope to sample Sydney and Perth and I do realise I'm being a bit if lightweight for moaning after just a month. Sometimes it helps just putting stuff down in writing. I'm really struggling to see myself settle in oz, which does het OH a lot. She would be here permenently so she could be near her folks.
I've gotta get in the job trail, I know that will help a lot when I'm earning.
I'm not after any advise, just really wanted to get stuff off my chest. Lots if people I know say its the greatest place to live, but I'm struggling to see that at the mo. I know I've gotta give it time, and judge maybe in 8 or 9 months.
Thanks for listening...
So me and my missus have been in oz for nearly a month. We've only got a 1 year visa, and we're living with her folks in Adelaide at the moment.
So I've got through Xmas and new year, we had her 3 sister and 2 of there b/fs stay here too and it's been a good time, but saying goodbye to one couple last night as they head back to uk really hit me hard. I've spoken to my mum a few times on Skype but barely spoken to dad and I miss them a lot. It's also dawned on me that I will have to face a lot of ready and sad goodbyes if I wanted to live here permenently. I also hate the prospect of my parents not seeing grand kids regularly.
Anyway, we've been in Adelaide for 2 weeks after a week in Melbourne. The weather in Adelaide has been mid to high 30's and 40 a couple if days. After leaving frosty England, it's taken some real getting used to.
I've felt really homesick over the last few days. Me and OH have had few petty squabbles which has not helped. I know I need to MTFU up and get through the next few weeks and hopefully it will get better.
I really need a job of some sort. The days are dragging at the moment and I need something else to focus my mind on away from the uk.
I'm finding oz a bit weird at the moment. There doesn't seem like much of a community feel to the places I've been to. There doesn't seem like much to do apart from shopping or the beach. It's far too hot for soccer or golf or any sort of outdoor hobby. I'm still converting prices back to pounds, so I'm also thinking everything is well overpriced. 8 or 9$ for a beer has stung when out over Xmas.
I hope to sample Sydney and Perth and I do realise I'm being a bit if lightweight for moaning after just a month. Sometimes it helps just putting stuff down in writing. I'm really struggling to see myself settle in oz, which does het OH a lot. She would be here permenently so she could be near her folks.
I've gotta get in the job trail, I know that will help a lot when I'm earning.
I'm not after any advise, just really wanted to get stuff off my chest. Lots if people I know say its the greatest place to live, but I'm struggling to see that at the mo. I know I've gotta give it time, and judge maybe in 8 or 9 months.
Thanks for listening...
Hi Andy, boy are you a glutton for punishment. Going from a winter UK to a summer Adelaide.
The first time I was in Adelaide, IU was driving a F1 Brabham at Mallala. The track melted, & 2 of us had our automatic fire extinguishers go off in the cockpit. I suppose you could have picked a tougher place to swap to, but I'm not sure.
Now come winter you'll find the climate great, like a dry UK summer.
I spent a few years in the islands, mostly New Guinea, & the Solomon Islands, & had no trouble adjusting. However when I came back to Oz I found myself lost, until I started working seriously at something.
I reckon you are definitely right about getting a job. Once you are working seriously, you'll probably have trouble finding time to be lost.
Get a car, & go do some driving round the hills, there is some great motoring to be had there, to take your mind of home.
The first time I was in Adelaide, IU was driving a F1 Brabham at Mallala. The track melted, & 2 of us had our automatic fire extinguishers go off in the cockpit. I suppose you could have picked a tougher place to swap to, but I'm not sure.
Now come winter you'll find the climate great, like a dry UK summer.
I spent a few years in the islands, mostly New Guinea, & the Solomon Islands, & had no trouble adjusting. However when I came back to Oz I found myself lost, until I started working seriously at something.
I reckon you are definitely right about getting a job. Once you are working seriously, you'll probably have trouble finding time to be lost.
Get a car, & go do some driving round the hills, there is some great motoring to be had there, to take your mind of home.
Andy,
Moving so far is tough. Normally after a few months, but in your case it looks as though without a job and with family visiting and leaving, it's not been a normal transition. I've moved twice (aus to the usa, then aus to Switzerland), So i understand how you are feeling. Work is very important because it gives you a purpose, and helps you meet people - so that will certainly help. Perhaps you should approach it by looking at this as a one year 'experience', and see and learn as much as you can. If at the end you love it, give it another year and see. It also sounds like you need to find that community feel, which does not exist in the suburbs. Look for areas where there is a pub, cafes, shops, etc, where you will get that. Also, the stress of the move can bring on a lot of fights. It's stressful for both of you, so try to focus on making her happy and things will fall in place.
All the best.
Moving so far is tough. Normally after a few months, but in your case it looks as though without a job and with family visiting and leaving, it's not been a normal transition. I've moved twice (aus to the usa, then aus to Switzerland), So i understand how you are feeling. Work is very important because it gives you a purpose, and helps you meet people - so that will certainly help. Perhaps you should approach it by looking at this as a one year 'experience', and see and learn as much as you can. If at the end you love it, give it another year and see. It also sounds like you need to find that community feel, which does not exist in the suburbs. Look for areas where there is a pub, cafes, shops, etc, where you will get that. Also, the stress of the move can bring on a lot of fights. It's stressful for both of you, so try to focus on making her happy and things will fall in place.
All the best.
Agree with Hasbeen, try and find a job. Once you are earning Oz money it will feel a lot easier. My brother just visited from the UK for the first time in about 12 years and he was also converting everything to pounds and saying it was expensive. I told him, if you put it into perspective then it is not too bad, as we earn a larger amount of dollars to corresponding pounds. Yes some things are expensive, like cars. Try and get a car so you can get around and see places.
Cheers for the replies. Sometimes it feels a bit like I'm sort of doing the whole OZ thing wrong. I knew it would be hard moving to a place that I don't know and don't really know where anything is or who anyone is.
I'm lucky because we are staying with her parents. They have done loads for us which is great, but that's perhaps part of the reason I'm so bored. Even not having to do my own cooking or washing etc. I do have access to the car, but I've felt it would be a bit awkward maybe to go off for a hoon, when all the 8 or so of the family are about. Also, I cannot get my bearings in my head. I know the area where I live and the roads for about 2 or 3 miles, but I wouldn't really know how to get into the city.
After today, it'll just be me and OH and her parents living here, and they should be back at work, so hopefully we'll have chance to spend a bit of time together and clear the air and do a few bits together.
I'm also missing my old mates quite a bit. I could've done with a night or 2 out for a few beers and a laugh outside of the family time. I also miss English soccer. Anyone know any decent sites to catch highlights of the Premier League? The TV over here is shockingly bad. We only have the 15 or so freeview channels and 5 or so of them are home shopping. I found myself watching Sparticus yesterday
I'm lucky because we are staying with her parents. They have done loads for us which is great, but that's perhaps part of the reason I'm so bored. Even not having to do my own cooking or washing etc. I do have access to the car, but I've felt it would be a bit awkward maybe to go off for a hoon, when all the 8 or so of the family are about. Also, I cannot get my bearings in my head. I know the area where I live and the roads for about 2 or 3 miles, but I wouldn't really know how to get into the city.
After today, it'll just be me and OH and her parents living here, and they should be back at work, so hopefully we'll have chance to spend a bit of time together and clear the air and do a few bits together.
I'm also missing my old mates quite a bit. I could've done with a night or 2 out for a few beers and a laugh outside of the family time. I also miss English soccer. Anyone know any decent sites to catch highlights of the Premier League? The TV over here is shockingly bad. We only have the 15 or so freeview channels and 5 or so of them are home shopping. I found myself watching Sparticus yesterday
Aussie TV still crap then - was there in '99 and lifesavers in budgie smugglers on a sunday mornin', no thanks! at least you've got the internet
Get yourself down the local Leagues club - Aussies are sporty & will love the chance to beat a Pom - if you beat them (darts, pool, anything) & buy 'em a beer after you'll be seen as a good bloke.
Now the hols are over, your main job is getting a job - anything'll do. Just call every employment agency, make appointments & get out to see them, into the city with a cv & visit everywhere you'd want to work.
Let us know how you get on
Get yourself down the local Leagues club - Aussies are sporty & will love the chance to beat a Pom - if you beat them (darts, pool, anything) & buy 'em a beer after you'll be seen as a good bloke.
Now the hols are over, your main job is getting a job - anything'll do. Just call every employment agency, make appointments & get out to see them, into the city with a cv & visit everywhere you'd want to work.
Let us know how you get on
They have a Targa Adelaide, [or South Australia], a tarmac rally like Targa Tasmania around there.
Get on the net & find the route, then go drive it, just not quite so fast. It takes in some great country.
There is a fair bit of motor sport of all forms there, with some great vintage & historic organisations, as well as all forms of motoring interest. Join a couple. Put yourself up for some work load. Clubs always have trouble finding secretaries, treasurers, & magazine editors etc., they will grab you & put you to work.
This type of thing often leads to real work opportunities, & definitely to friends.
It's definitely get off the bum time Andy.
If you are having motivational problems, here is one that worked with horses, in the old days of Oz. Requires a rusty nail, & a bottle of turps. The idea was to scratch the horse on the rump, with said nail, then pour the turps on the scratch.
If it could get a tired old horse gingered up & running again, it should work with a demotivated pom, I reckon.
Give us a post, after you slow down.
Get on the net & find the route, then go drive it, just not quite so fast. It takes in some great country.
There is a fair bit of motor sport of all forms there, with some great vintage & historic organisations, as well as all forms of motoring interest. Join a couple. Put yourself up for some work load. Clubs always have trouble finding secretaries, treasurers, & magazine editors etc., they will grab you & put you to work.
This type of thing often leads to real work opportunities, & definitely to friends.
It's definitely get off the bum time Andy.
If you are having motivational problems, here is one that worked with horses, in the old days of Oz. Requires a rusty nail, & a bottle of turps. The idea was to scratch the horse on the rump, with said nail, then pour the turps on the scratch.
If it could get a tired old horse gingered up & running again, it should work with a demotivated pom, I reckon.
Give us a post, after you slow down.
I can sort of relate to what's going on here - me and Mrs PB landed here almost 10 years ago with a one-year visa. Not found us yet 
We spent the first few months in a dingy two-room (not two bedrooms, just the two rooms in total) unit above a pizza restuarant in Enmore, Sydney.
The Mrs went and found work straight away, but I couldn't get a job related to my profession, and was starting to find it all a bit, well, tiresome. There's only so many days you can just loaf on the beach...
So I worked at a truck driver doing office removals. Easier than you think with a UK licence as it allows you (or used to) to drive up to 7.5t, rather than 4.5t in NSW. Great fun for a few months - met lots of people, introduced me to new circles of friends and gave me the breathing space to look for my 'real' job. And it also brought in some cash so we could go exploring.
Ten years later, with a young family, I don't have any regrets. I miss a few things - family, friends, pubs, beer, countryside, cars, roads, mountain bike courses, proximity to Europe, supermarkets, clothes, shoes - OK, I miss a lot of things, but I've learned not to dwell on them, and instead look around me a take what I've got. I spent New Years Day on the beach from 9am, throwing my kids into the surf and having a ball. Could I do that in Bristol? Not without getting sectioned.
Bit of a longer post than I thought it would be... Its pretty much as others have already said, but landing just before Christmas, in a heatwave, is probably not going to give you the most comfortable feeling. It does get better, though, and you might find one of the other cities suits you better - its worth looking. Happy travels!!
We spent the first few months in a dingy two-room (not two bedrooms, just the two rooms in total) unit above a pizza restuarant in Enmore, Sydney. The Mrs went and found work straight away, but I couldn't get a job related to my profession, and was starting to find it all a bit, well, tiresome. There's only so many days you can just loaf on the beach...
So I worked at a truck driver doing office removals. Easier than you think with a UK licence as it allows you (or used to) to drive up to 7.5t, rather than 4.5t in NSW. Great fun for a few months - met lots of people, introduced me to new circles of friends and gave me the breathing space to look for my 'real' job. And it also brought in some cash so we could go exploring.
Ten years later, with a young family, I don't have any regrets. I miss a few things - family, friends, pubs, beer, countryside, cars, roads, mountain bike courses, proximity to Europe, supermarkets, clothes, shoes - OK, I miss a lot of things, but I've learned not to dwell on them, and instead look around me a take what I've got. I spent New Years Day on the beach from 9am, throwing my kids into the surf and having a ball. Could I do that in Bristol? Not without getting sectioned.
Bit of a longer post than I thought it would be... Its pretty much as others have already said, but landing just before Christmas, in a heatwave, is probably not going to give you the most comfortable feeling. It does get better, though, and you might find one of the other cities suits you better - its worth looking. Happy travels!!
Just to add to the slight depressing tone…
I’ve been in Australia now for 6 months – 5 of those in Brisbane doing FiFo and the last month in Sydney. It’s a bit of a pain now as I’d just got to a state of normality in Brisbane when I had to pack up and do it all again – but it was the choice I made to get away from FiFo (which I wouldn’t recommend to anyone sane).
I had my Partner over for Xmas/NYE with a couple of our friends, and we had a great time – it was fantastic to get to explore Australia with people, driving around on your own just doesn't really feel the same. I waved them off at the weekend, now back in work and it’s a bit of a struggle to be honest.
Part of the trip was for her to see Australia with a view to moving out later this year, but although she liked it here as a holiday, she had said (and I understand) that she doesn't think she could move here. This has kind of thrown everything up in the air for me too, so while I’m trying to settle in Sydney I’m thinking that it won’t be for long as I’ll have to move.
The problem I find now, having worked in a few countries, is that I don’t feel settled anywhere in particular – I know if I went back to the UK then I’d be happy for 6 months before wanting to go somewhere else.
Strangely, she liked the Middle East – so maybe we might end up with a compromise and both move there…..
I’ve been in Australia now for 6 months – 5 of those in Brisbane doing FiFo and the last month in Sydney. It’s a bit of a pain now as I’d just got to a state of normality in Brisbane when I had to pack up and do it all again – but it was the choice I made to get away from FiFo (which I wouldn’t recommend to anyone sane).
I had my Partner over for Xmas/NYE with a couple of our friends, and we had a great time – it was fantastic to get to explore Australia with people, driving around on your own just doesn't really feel the same. I waved them off at the weekend, now back in work and it’s a bit of a struggle to be honest.
Part of the trip was for her to see Australia with a view to moving out later this year, but although she liked it here as a holiday, she had said (and I understand) that she doesn't think she could move here. This has kind of thrown everything up in the air for me too, so while I’m trying to settle in Sydney I’m thinking that it won’t be for long as I’ll have to move.
The problem I find now, having worked in a few countries, is that I don’t feel settled anywhere in particular – I know if I went back to the UK then I’d be happy for 6 months before wanting to go somewhere else.
Strangely, she liked the Middle East – so maybe we might end up with a compromise and both move there…..
Mattt said:
The problem I find now, having worked in a few countries, is that I don’t feel settled anywhere in particular – I know if I went back to the UK then I’d be happy for 6 months before wanting to go somewhere else.
Sorry to hear it's not working out Mattt. I know exactly how you feel about a lack of a real 'home' once you've been living away. Half of the reason for our impending move to Sydney is to get to somewhere that offers a chance of settling; the short termism of the Middle East is grinding me down after four years. For the OP I have to echo the advice above; seems like you're a bit of a passenger at the moment so you need some direction to make Aus work for you. My Bro in Law didn't work for two years when he moved to Melbourne a decade ago and was desperately unhappy. A month after finding a job (any job - he was in a bread factory) all of that changed. He's now moved jobs twice and is doing what he did in the UK but for more money and has picked up a load of mates in the places he's worked along the way. He also just turned up at the local sports club one weekend and got asked to help coach a kids side; he's been elected Chairman of the club every second year since!
I use this example because by his own admission he's not the most outgoing or the most confident of chaps - it seems to me that Aussie society is pretty open to new comers so long as you're willing to get involved.
No man is an island - get building some bridges!
Hitch78 said:
Mattt said:
The problem I find now, having worked in a few countries, is that I don’t feel settled anywhere in particular – I know if I went back to the UK then I’d be happy for 6 months before wanting to go somewhere else.
Sorry to hear it's not working out Mattt. I know exactly how you feel about a lack of a real 'home' once you've been living away. Half of the reason for our impending move to Sydney is to get to somewhere that offers a chance of settling; the short termism of the Middle East is grinding me down after four years.I think if she came here, we could be happy - I don't have anywhere near the amount of 'Falling Down' days as I did in the UAE/Qatar, and there's no head wobbling going on.
I've tried to sell it as a 'temporary' thing, come for a couple of years and see how it goes - we can always return if she doesn't like it, however she is settled in the UK with a house/career which is going well, and it's a lot for her to give up, particularly when I'm fairly whimsical when it comes to opportunities...
All in all, it's still a fantastic place to live, particularly given the state of the economy vs the world. The only thing I haven't found to be true is the better work/life balance, in the experience of many people I've met, it's pretty similar to the UK - but the opportunities outside work are better or at least different.
I've lived out of the UK for a while and the easy way to stop thinking about the UK is to actually think about the UK as strange as it seems. You only need to think about the reasons you wanted to leave the UK and realise that you don't really want to return any time soon.
The miserable weather for 12 months of the year, the over crowded roads, the state of the roads, the general up-tight attitudes of people, the crap TV, etc. etc. etc...... after giving these a bit of thought you'll soon 'pick up' and be glad you're not here
The miserable weather for 12 months of the year, the over crowded roads, the state of the roads, the general up-tight attitudes of people, the crap TV, etc. etc. etc...... after giving these a bit of thought you'll soon 'pick up' and be glad you're not here
Google [bot] said:
AJI said:
The over crowded roads, the state of the roads, the general up-tight attitudes of people, the crap TV, etc. etc. etc...... after giving these a bit of thought you'll soon 'pick up' and be glad you're not here
Pick up?! Suicide recipe right there 
t hole to a life of effort just to enjoy each day makes me want to kill myself.Don't look at Australia of how it is better than the UK, look at the UK and how bad it is.
Quick update, I went and met up with a mate yesterday, who's over from UK for Xmas and new year. We sat and had a good chat and a couple of beers which was nice. It was good to have a chat with someone whom I'm not living with and just do the general blokey thing for the afternoon.
I've got 2 interviews tomorrow afternoon which both look promising, so thats good progress too.
Thanks for all the replies everyone.
I've got 2 interviews tomorrow afternoon which both look promising, so thats good progress too.
Thanks for all the replies everyone.
Pommygranite said:
Spot on. The thought of returning to that broken st hole to a life of effort just to enjoy each day makes me want to kill myself.
Don't look at Australia of how it is better than the UK, look at the UK and how bad it is.
Never a truer word said! After over 10 years in Oz, there's no way I'd go back to living in the UK. ft hole to a life of effort just to enjoy each day makes me want to kill myself.Don't look at Australia of how it is better than the UK, look at the UK and how bad it is.
k that.Gassing Station | Australia | Top of Page | What's New | My Stuff